The Snow's Lament - Part 1
Author: emmachase
Requested by: Everyone who took part in my poll
Title: The Snow's Lament - Part 1
Rating: R
Genre: Angst, Family, some fluff
Pairing: RyuuJima (Yuto/Ryutaro) <- Brotherly love
Summary: Remember that little poll I had a while ago? Well, I finally got around to making a quick story about it! I hope you like it
Notes: Stay tuned for the next chapter folks!
“I don't want to! I don’t want it!” Ryutaro yelled as he stormed out of the room, firmly sliding the door behind him shut. He ran to his room at the far corner of the mountain mansion and plopped upon the tatamis in his room.
“Unthinkable….” He mumbled as he replayed the events of the last conversation in his mind.
“We’re perfectly happy as we are…. Why does he need to do something as stupid as that!?” Ryutaro yelled to no one in particular.
“Because…. Your father is lonely… and so is Ms. Nakajima…” A voice said and Ryutaro turned around to see a woman standing at the door to his room. She was a soft spoken woman, dressed ornately in a Kimono and her hair done up in a bun.
“He’s not lonely! He’s perfectly happy!” Ryutaro insisted adamantly.
“Is he? Ever since your mother passed away when you were three, your father has been so alone, so afraid to search for someone, and he devoted his time to you and to his arts…. Ryuu-Chan, don’t you think its time to let your father go?” The woman knelt quietly beside the pouting boy and gently patted his head.
“Oh… what do you know anyway Aiko…” Ryutaro grumbled.
“Ryutaro! Ryutaro where are you?” A man’s voice called through the halls.
“He’s in here! In his room!” Aiko replied as Ryutaro gave her a glare
“…. Traitor… Let’s not forget you’re MY caretaker….” The little boy sat up again for the lecture he was sure was coming. He sat with his back straight up, dressed in his own Kimono, bearing proudly the Morimoto crest, a symbol that had become synonymous with the arts in Japan. He heard the door slide open and somewhat to his surprise, the lecture he expected never came. Instead, he felt a hand land upon his shoulder and when he opened his eyes, his father was sitting beside him.
“Ryutaro… I know it can’t be easy for you to hear all this at once… but this is the way things are….”
“I’ve never met this woman! Who is she?! Why do you have to remarry!?” Ryutaro demanded all at once.
“She is the person who calms my soul, and she is the mother that I have been searching for you to have….”
“I don't want it… any of it!”
“A-Ah… well… I forgot…. Ms. Nakajima, has a child of her own….. you’ll have an older brother!” Ryutaro glared at his father as he tried to focus on the cheerful side of the situation.
“Ryutaro…. I want to marry Ms. Nakajima, and I want us to be a happy family… don’t you think you can help dad do that?” The man asked softly, and by now, Ryutaro had laid down upon his bed again, and he was tired of this whole situation.
“Whatever…” He replied. Ryutaro resolved he would never accept this. No matter what, he would not accept… that woman.. or her son..
A few days passed, as Ryutaro shut himself into his room, he did his flower arrangements, his tea ceremonies, and his calligraphy, the very things that had always brought him peace. They all seemed to fail him now, as he tried his best to come to terms with the people that would soon be invading his home.
“This is hopeless….” He sighed as he set down the white rose he was holding upon the soft mahogany table and slid open the door to the small pond behind his room. He gazed at the moon reflected in its waters and he sighed as he could hear someone approaching in the distant halls. The sounds of the small creek in the courtyard just outside became muffled as he picked up one… two…. People walking quickly.
“Ryutaro…. This is Ms. Nakajima…. And her son, Yuto. Your new mother and brother….” Ryutaro recognized the sounds of his father’s voice, and he refused to turn around.
“Ryutaro…. Look….. now….” The man repeated, and this time Ryutaro rolled his eyes as he turned reluctantly to see a woman dressed in the softest green kimono and a boy wearing the same, except in pure silky white.
“Hello… Ryutaro-Kun….” The lady bowed and her son did the same.
“Hello…” Ryutaro grumbled.
The rest of the night didn't go much better, the awkward silence that hung in the air stayed there for the whole of the evening. Ryutaro glanced and wrinkled his nose as he watched the “newlyweds” be all lovey dovey. He turned to look at the boy that had become his brother and for a moment he was struck with bewilderment. The boy in the white Kimono was silent, he hadn’t said a single word since they had met. Ryutaro watched as the boy, softly picked up his chopsticks and began eating, his eyes never changed from their tired state. If anything… he looked to be absolutely worn out. .
“Ryutaro? Why don't you go talk to Yuto-kun? After all, he is your brother now…” His father encouraged. Which by all respects, was all the more reason NOT to go talk to him.
Still, Ryutaro spent the night staring at the boy, Yuto. He noticed the delicate ways he set things down, the gracefulness of his actions, and even the soft way he spoke whenever spoken to. Why was he so tired? As far as Ryutaro could tell, he wasn’t against the marriage, and it wasn't as if he had done anything to prevent it…..
“Whatever… I’m going to bed…” The little boy excused himself as he walked to his room. He shut the door tightly, making sure to insist that he be left alone. He lay down on his futon covered tatatmis in the room and sighed. This was the way it was going to be from now on…. And he hated it. He thought about how awkward it would be to call someone…. Else… mom… and while he pondered just what to do about his “brother” he felt the soft embraces of his blankets reach him and drag him into a soft slumber.
Ryutaro yawned awake as he sat up again.
“Must have…. Dozed off…..” He shook his head slightly to wake himself up. In the distance, he heard the soft sounds of a instrument being played and he stood up to investigate. No one within the house played an instrument this late, not ever. He crept to his door and peeked out to see the hallway empty. Quietly he shuffled across the floor, following the sounds to the small room that rested directly across the courtyard from his and he slid the door open just a bit.
There sitting on the floor was Yuto, his back still rigidly straight and in his hands rested a flute. The soft notes that came from the boy’s mouth wafted around him as if carried by the winds and swam through the air carrying its soft melody to all who would lend an ear. The melody bounced and skipped happily, but all too suddenly it turned and drifted slowly… wearily…. It grew tired, and wept.
Ryutaro gasped quietly as the outer coat of Yuto’s white Kimono slipped off the boy’s slender shoulder, revealing his left shoulder and a few scars along the boy’s back. He was so focused on the scars that he barely noticed when Yuto stopped playing until he saw the slender form stand up. Slowly Yuto walked to the small door that overlooked the mountain that lay just beyond, and he looked into the sky as if talking with the stars themselves. For a brief moment, Ryutaro felt such pity for him, and yet he didn’t know why. Yuto looked so sad… his pale white shoulder glowed with the light of the moon and the boy’s eyes were still dull.
“Anh!” Ryutaro fell backwards as Yuto turned to look at the door, and he felt their eyes lock. But as he tried to stand up the door slid open and Yuto stood before him, his Kimono still askew on his slender frame. He wore a pair of simple white pajama pants that tied together around his waist by a thin cord and as Ryutaro gulped and looked up at him. He noticed the battle marks along Yuto’s body and gulped again as the older boy slowly knelt down and offered his hand.
“Ryutaro-kun… are you okay?” Yuto said in barely above a whisper, his voice still tired, but firm.
“I-I u-uh… I wasn't spying on you…” Ryutaro managed as he tried to stand up again without Yuto’s help.
“I see…. Did I wake you?” Yuto asked as he turned around and walked back into the room.
“N-No! I… was just out…for a walk…” Ryutaro cursed himself as he realized he was somehow on the defensive part of this conversation.
“You’re very lucky…. To have lived such a peaceful life….” Yuto said as he lightly caressed a small flower arrangement in the corner of the room. Ryutaro blinked blankly as he took in the words, but understood nothing of their meaning. He squinted at the arrangement in the distance to see it as one of his own, the small arrangement with a single white rose standing amongst a tangle of greens.
“Dad….” Ryutaro mumbled.
“Wh-Whatever! I…. I will never accept this! And I.. I’ll never accept you as my brother!” Ryutaro grew infuriated as he felt so little right at that moment. He had no reason to be afraid of Yuto, but he was…..
With nothing else between the boys, Ryutaro stood up and stormed out of the room, not caring if he woke people up when he stomped back to his room.
Yuto sighed as for the first time that night, he left his posture relax and he shut the door to his room again. He lay down upon his own soft tatamis and closed his eyes as he thought about the boy that had just stormed out of his room and absolutely refused to acknowledge him.
---The Next Day---
Ryutaro ran out into the courtyard as he laughed with a couple of the boys that played with him during the day. Their mothers came to the Morimoto house for Ikebana lessons from Ryutaro’s father, and while they were in class, the boys were set free to wander and play.
“Hey! Give that back!” Ryutaro shouted as one of the boys grasped the ball that he had been holding. After the events of last night he was in no mood to play anything and just sat there.
“Well if you’re not going to ussssee it! It’s ours!” The boy who stole the ball made a face, mocking Ryutaro.
“I said give it back!” He tried again
“Or what!? You’ll throw some flowers at me?” The boy and his companions laughed.
“I-I’ll….” What did Ryutaro have that he could honestly threaten them with?
As he stumbled for a threat, the boys laughter died out as their eyes grew wide in terror. Ryutaro looked at them for a moment before realizing that they were looking at someone behind him.
“Wha-“ He turned to see Yuto standing behind him.
“H-Here!” The boy threw the ball at Ryutaro with all his might and ran off.
“Are you okay? Otouto-kun?” Yuto knelt again as he again offered a pale moon white hand.
“I’m fine! Just.. leave me alone!” Ryutaro insisted as he stood up again without the boy’s help and stormed off into the distance again. He didn’t know if he should be annoyed that his playmates were all scared off…. Or annoyed that Yuto talked as if they were really a family.
“Ah, Ryuu-Chan? Why aren’t you playing?” The door slid open as Aiko stepped in and began to quietly wipe down and dust the furniture in Ryutaro’s room.
“Stupid Yuto scared away all my friends…” He grumbled as he threw the ball he had been holding back into his closet.
“It’s not his fault…. I rather pity the boy….” Aiko sighed as she took to scrubbing a particular spot just outside the room.
“W-Why?” Ryutaro asked, suddenly curious.
“Well… after all that he’s been through… the poor soul…”
She looked at Ryutaro but found the young boy’s face still puzzled.
“O-Oh my….. You don't know?”
Ryutaro shook his head
“Yuto-kun…. Is a victim of circumstance… he hasn't been very fortunate in life…. When he was little…. he began to receive training…. And not the type of culture that you or I are used to, but rather… of the… “ She swallowed hard as she could barely choke out the last word
“What?” Ryutaro pursued
“Murderous… sort….”
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“Yuto-kun…. Is….. an no he was an….assassin…”
Ryutaro blinked as he froze right to the spot.
“Y-You’re kidding…. I-I don't believe that…”
“It wasn't by his choice…. His father pressured him and essentially treated him like…. Like a sword for hire….”
“You’re lying… right?”
“It was only last year that Yuto-kun’s father, the late Mr. Nakajima died. Supposedly, around that time, Yuto’s mother took over his life and freed him from….. that… world… and well… I don't know… but I know that they called him “The Snow”, he would always wear white, like he does now, and no one… none of his supposed targets have ever survived…..”
“H-How…do you know..”
“I’ve heard the talk between your father and Ms. Nakajima, I’ve heard the way people in town talk about him.. it’s not a joke Ryutaro-kun… you should be nicer to him, for life certainly hasn't been.” Aiko sighed as she picked up her rags and walked away to the next room.
Ryutaro sat quietly alone in his room for a moment as he let the new information sink in. He imagined Yuto the night that he saw him, reflecting upon the moon, and he realized it all made sense… he recognized the tired look in the boy’s eyes as those of someone who had been through so much he was tired…. Of life.
He didn't know what to do with this bit of knowledge now….. he wondered why things had developed the way they had, and he wondered if he should …. Apologize to the boy somehow… he hadn’t really done anything wrong afterall…
After making up his mind, Ryutaro stood up and slowly trekked his way to Yuto’s room again and knocked. He heard no steps within the room and sighed as he felt his resolve fading again. But just as he turned to walk away the door to the room slid open and Yuto stood before him again.
“Ryutaro-kun?” He asked quietly.
“I… I’m sorry okay?” Ryutaro spat out bluntly
“For what?”
“I… I don't know… I just am… “
“Ryutaro…” Yuto looked at the still shrinking boy that stood before him, their eyes never met as the younger boy kept his focused firmly on the ground.
“Are you… scared of me?” Yuto asked, his voice showing a bit of emotion for the first time
“N-no! I just uh…”
“Then I take it… you’ve heard about me…” Yuto said softly as he knelt down beside the boy again.
“I-Is it true?” Ryutaro asked, and he felt so childish again as he cursed himself.
“Yes… I used to be a very different person… but despite my past… Ryutaro….” Yuto stopped as he gently lifted the younger boy’s chin until their eyes met.
“Despite my past… I would never hurt you…. You’re my… cherished little brother…” Yuto smiled, and Ryutaro was taken aback as he saw for the first time just how bright Yuto could be.
“Why….?” Ryutaro wasn't sure if he was really asking anything now, but he found his eyes fixed on Yuto as he stood up.
“You know… it’s been almost a year since my father died…. He was the one…. Who started me into all this… do you remember what I said Ryutaro-kun? About how you were so lucky to have grown up so peacefully? Your hands have touched only the softest of silks and the prettiest of roses, you heard the sounds of waterfalls outside your room… where as I suffered through nights of screams and fights, my hands were, and still are, stained with blood that I cant wash off…. But when my father died…. He told me that he would take all the responsibility for my sufferings, that he was… sorry he had made me into who I am…and when he died… he told me to find that one thing in life that I wanted. I knew then… that I wanted…. A family. I wanted something that I could nurture, something that I could protect….. I’ve seen so much death Ryutaro…. And I’ve seen horrors you can only imagine…. When I see you…. I imagine the life that I could have had… I can see happiness in your eyes…. And I want to nurture that…” Yuto sighed as he sat down again.
“If only you would let me in….. I want to be your brother….but I wont force myself upon you…”
“I…I….” Ryutaro felt so ashamed at his conduct…. He had been acting like a spoiled brat this entire time towards Yuto….
“You don't have to answer me all at once…. You don't even have to call me Nii-chan, just…. whenever you’re ready….” Yuto said softly as he sat down on the floored tatami, the white kimono slipped off his shoulder again as he lay down upon the soft blankets.
“I…” Ryutaro didn't know what to say anymore…. And he turned around and left the room.
The next few days were awkward around the house. Ryutaro felt annoyed with the woman his father had married, but at the same time annoyed with himself, for letting something like this get to him. But now, whenever he looked at Yuto, another sensation overtook him… pity.
Yuto had never done anything wrong to him, but why was he so angry at him? The boy wanted to be his brother, but he could do nothing but push him away.
“Ryuu-kun, you’ll have to be careful where you zone out today, the people that are moving all the furniture at here today. They’ll be moving things around the house to make room for your mother’s things. Don’t get in their way okay?” Aiko smiled as Ryutaro grumbled again and walked off, finding another quiet place to ponder about his situation again.
Quietly he walked to his own courtyard, the small one lined with lush green trees and he stopped as he noticed a boy in the loose white kimono standing beneath his favorite tree. He could see Yuto’s hand touch against the base, as the taller boy looked up at the branches. The leaves that had fallen around him whipped around, dancing as if they had found a new friend, and Ryutaro scowled.
Blocking everything out of his mind, he managed enough concentration to walk to his room and close himself in. He liked being alone these days, the quiet helped him think, but he knew he couldn’t always shut himself away everyday.
“Maybe… just for today…. I should try a little harder…” Ryutaro sighed as he got up again and walked to the door. He wasn't sure where it wanted to go though, he had just gotten to his room and now….
“Ah! I’ll go to the kitchen… maybe… something to eat….” He wondered aloud again as he opened the door and poked his head out. Gently, as if he were afraid someone would catch him, he walked towards the kitchens, but as he did, his mind began to wonder again. This time, he found himself imagining all the things that Yuto had said.
He imagined horrible nights of tossing and turning to the sounds of people fighting, people screaming. He imagined having to kill someone….
Lastly, he imagined….. a family. He could see a bright and sunny day, and there he was running around until a taller boy tackled him playfully into the soft grasses and tickled him. Ryutaro smiled unconsciously as he felt Yuto’s arms around him and the older boy hugged him tightly. He felt… comfortable… loved…. Now his father would come with his mother at his side, and they’d take a picture of the two boys, giggling to themselves as their sons played together.
“I should….. be nicer to Yuto…” Ryutaro said finally, to no one but himself.
“Ryu-chan!” Aiko gasped as Ryutaro turned around to see two men lifting a heavy dresser behind him. One of the drawers was in the process of slipping out and hitting him in the head!
Ryutaro felt frozen to the spot, and he braced himself for the pain that was to come. Instead he felt something wrap around him and in a short instant he felt himself be pushed back a bit and finally the sounds of a loud thud, the sound of the drawer landing on the floor.
“Hnnh…” He let out and unconscious whimper as he opened his eyes. He saw a brilliant flash of white and his eyes opened all in an instant. Yuto had wrapped himself around him, and now, the older boy winced slightly as he slowly untangled his arms.
“Ryutaro-kun, are you okay?” Yuto asked, but Ryutaro stumbled. He didn't know what to say again…
“Ryuu-Chan! Are you okay!?” Aiko ran over inspecting the boy, and seeing that he was fine, she turned her attention to Yuto.
“Yuto-kun! You’re bleeding!” She nearly shrieked as she hurriedly pushed Yuto away in the direction of his room, saying she would need to bandage him up.
Ryutaro was left alone, standing in the corridor just outside his room, as the two men apologized, he stared at Yuto’s back, the silky white Kimono he always wore now had a growing red stain on the back. Suddenly…. He wasn’t so hungry anymore.
That night, Ryutaro lay in his room again, he didn't think it wise to go out again, especially during moving days. Instead, he busied himself with his flower arrangements, and his own calligraphy. He re-studied all of his past writings and in doing so, hours passed. He didn't noticed the hour until he heard a familiar melody in the air again.
Ryutaro got up now, and he winced as his legs had long fallen asleep. He felt the pinpricks of circulation returning, and stumbled his way to the door. The hallways were empty, the sounds of the men moving were now replaced by the familiar flute what wafted its way to his ears.
Gently he pressed his ears against the door to Yuto’s room and he closed his eyes as the melody calmed him. The song danced lightly around him, and then Ryutaro opened his eyes as he heard the sounds drop now. Once again into the soft sad notes it plunged and Ryutaro felt almost like crying.
“Ryutaro-kun, if you’d like, you can come in…..” Yuto called out, and Ryutaro wondered how he knew. Shamefully he opened the door and stepped in. Yuto never turned around to look at him. Ryutaro was taken aback as he walked in to find the slender boy with bandages wrapped all the way across his back, blood seeped through the bandages and formed a large red gash.
Once again, Ryutaro felt terrible. He slowly walked over to the pale white boy and sat down next to him.
“Ryutaro-kun, are you okay? You shouldn't be sneaking out at nights.” Yuto said calmly
“H-Hai….” Ryutaro nodded.
Yuto picked up his flute again and just before he began to play Ryutaro turned to face him
“I’m… sorry…and… thank you… Yuto-kun” He said bluntly.
He watched as a small grin appeared on Yuto’s face and the flute rested in his lap again.
“W-What?” Ryutaro questioned again as he wondered if he was perhaps a bit too blunt with his words.
“You called me by my name… it’s nice… to hear…” Yuto smiled to himself as he placed the flute down beside him now and he gazed at the moon.
“But you know, Ryutaro-kun, you should never have to thank me… or apologize… we are family now… this is what one family member does for another….” Yuto said, his voice drifting softly.
“B-But…I just wanted to…”
“If you wanted to repay me… would you let me… call you… Otouto?” Yuto asked, his eyes never leaving the night sky.
“U-un..” Ryutaro nodded as he wondered about the simplicity of Yuto’s request.
“Ja…. Otouto-kun… I’m glad you came to see me…” Yuto smiled again as he turned his gaze to Ryutaro again and as their eyes met, Ryutaro felt frozen in place again. Yuto’s eyes gleamed, the tired look he had seen just days before, seemed to be replaced… with…. Happiness.
“Yuto-kun, could I…. come and listen to you….. tomorrow?” Ryutaro asked sheepishly. He couldn't explain it, but he felt so…. at ease whenever he was around Yuto. He looked back and felt rather stupid about thinking too much.
“You’re always welcome…” Yuto beamed.
Just as the night began to quiet and settle, the heavens opened and drops of rain began their descent. The waters coursed through the tiles on the roof, landing in a steady stream onto the pebbled ground below.
“Otouto-kun, don’t go back to your room tonight. I don't want you to catch a cold walking in the courtyard in this rain…” Yuto said as Ryutaro began to get up.
“B-but..”
Yuto turned to him and without a word, nodded to the soft futon. Ryutaro understood but didn't move. Instead he chose to sit beside Yuto a little longer as the boy listened to the rain. Everything was so peaceful… even if Yuto didn't say a word, he felt so at ease.
Somewhere in the middle of the night, Ryutaro realized he must have fallen asleep as he woke back to semi-consciousness. He felt himself resting on Yuto’s shoulders, and the older boy was now gently laying him down on a futon. The silky wave of a blanket rushed over him and he felt warm again… he wanted to thank Yuto, but his body would not wake up to permit it.
Maybe having a brother….wouldn’t be so bad…
(>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<)
Sorry it took so long Minna! I hope you enjoyed the story! Once again, Comments are ALWAYS welcome, as I love hearing from you! The more the better the longer the better!
~Emmie
Requested by: Everyone who took part in my poll
Title: The Snow's Lament - Part 1
Rating: R
Genre: Angst, Family, some fluff
Pairing: RyuuJima (Yuto/Ryutaro) <- Brotherly love
Summary: Remember that little poll I had a while ago? Well, I finally got around to making a quick story about it! I hope you like it
Notes: Stay tuned for the next chapter folks!
“I don't want to! I don’t want it!” Ryutaro yelled as he stormed out of the room, firmly sliding the door behind him shut. He ran to his room at the far corner of the mountain mansion and plopped upon the tatamis in his room.
“Unthinkable….” He mumbled as he replayed the events of the last conversation in his mind.
“We’re perfectly happy as we are…. Why does he need to do something as stupid as that!?” Ryutaro yelled to no one in particular.
“Because…. Your father is lonely… and so is Ms. Nakajima…” A voice said and Ryutaro turned around to see a woman standing at the door to his room. She was a soft spoken woman, dressed ornately in a Kimono and her hair done up in a bun.
“He’s not lonely! He’s perfectly happy!” Ryutaro insisted adamantly.
“Is he? Ever since your mother passed away when you were three, your father has been so alone, so afraid to search for someone, and he devoted his time to you and to his arts…. Ryuu-Chan, don’t you think its time to let your father go?” The woman knelt quietly beside the pouting boy and gently patted his head.
“Oh… what do you know anyway Aiko…” Ryutaro grumbled.
“Ryutaro! Ryutaro where are you?” A man’s voice called through the halls.
“He’s in here! In his room!” Aiko replied as Ryutaro gave her a glare
“…. Traitor… Let’s not forget you’re MY caretaker….” The little boy sat up again for the lecture he was sure was coming. He sat with his back straight up, dressed in his own Kimono, bearing proudly the Morimoto crest, a symbol that had become synonymous with the arts in Japan. He heard the door slide open and somewhat to his surprise, the lecture he expected never came. Instead, he felt a hand land upon his shoulder and when he opened his eyes, his father was sitting beside him.
“Ryutaro… I know it can’t be easy for you to hear all this at once… but this is the way things are….”
“I’ve never met this woman! Who is she?! Why do you have to remarry!?” Ryutaro demanded all at once.
“She is the person who calms my soul, and she is the mother that I have been searching for you to have….”
“I don't want it… any of it!”
“A-Ah… well… I forgot…. Ms. Nakajima, has a child of her own….. you’ll have an older brother!” Ryutaro glared at his father as he tried to focus on the cheerful side of the situation.
“Ryutaro…. I want to marry Ms. Nakajima, and I want us to be a happy family… don’t you think you can help dad do that?” The man asked softly, and by now, Ryutaro had laid down upon his bed again, and he was tired of this whole situation.
“Whatever…” He replied. Ryutaro resolved he would never accept this. No matter what, he would not accept… that woman.. or her son..
A few days passed, as Ryutaro shut himself into his room, he did his flower arrangements, his tea ceremonies, and his calligraphy, the very things that had always brought him peace. They all seemed to fail him now, as he tried his best to come to terms with the people that would soon be invading his home.
“This is hopeless….” He sighed as he set down the white rose he was holding upon the soft mahogany table and slid open the door to the small pond behind his room. He gazed at the moon reflected in its waters and he sighed as he could hear someone approaching in the distant halls. The sounds of the small creek in the courtyard just outside became muffled as he picked up one… two…. People walking quickly.
“Ryutaro…. This is Ms. Nakajima…. And her son, Yuto. Your new mother and brother….” Ryutaro recognized the sounds of his father’s voice, and he refused to turn around.
“Ryutaro…. Look….. now….” The man repeated, and this time Ryutaro rolled his eyes as he turned reluctantly to see a woman dressed in the softest green kimono and a boy wearing the same, except in pure silky white.
“Hello… Ryutaro-Kun….” The lady bowed and her son did the same.
“Hello…” Ryutaro grumbled.
The rest of the night didn't go much better, the awkward silence that hung in the air stayed there for the whole of the evening. Ryutaro glanced and wrinkled his nose as he watched the “newlyweds” be all lovey dovey. He turned to look at the boy that had become his brother and for a moment he was struck with bewilderment. The boy in the white Kimono was silent, he hadn’t said a single word since they had met. Ryutaro watched as the boy, softly picked up his chopsticks and began eating, his eyes never changed from their tired state. If anything… he looked to be absolutely worn out. .
“Ryutaro? Why don't you go talk to Yuto-kun? After all, he is your brother now…” His father encouraged. Which by all respects, was all the more reason NOT to go talk to him.
Still, Ryutaro spent the night staring at the boy, Yuto. He noticed the delicate ways he set things down, the gracefulness of his actions, and even the soft way he spoke whenever spoken to. Why was he so tired? As far as Ryutaro could tell, he wasn’t against the marriage, and it wasn't as if he had done anything to prevent it…..
“Whatever… I’m going to bed…” The little boy excused himself as he walked to his room. He shut the door tightly, making sure to insist that he be left alone. He lay down on his futon covered tatatmis in the room and sighed. This was the way it was going to be from now on…. And he hated it. He thought about how awkward it would be to call someone…. Else… mom… and while he pondered just what to do about his “brother” he felt the soft embraces of his blankets reach him and drag him into a soft slumber.
Ryutaro yawned awake as he sat up again.
“Must have…. Dozed off…..” He shook his head slightly to wake himself up. In the distance, he heard the soft sounds of a instrument being played and he stood up to investigate. No one within the house played an instrument this late, not ever. He crept to his door and peeked out to see the hallway empty. Quietly he shuffled across the floor, following the sounds to the small room that rested directly across the courtyard from his and he slid the door open just a bit.
There sitting on the floor was Yuto, his back still rigidly straight and in his hands rested a flute. The soft notes that came from the boy’s mouth wafted around him as if carried by the winds and swam through the air carrying its soft melody to all who would lend an ear. The melody bounced and skipped happily, but all too suddenly it turned and drifted slowly… wearily…. It grew tired, and wept.
Ryutaro gasped quietly as the outer coat of Yuto’s white Kimono slipped off the boy’s slender shoulder, revealing his left shoulder and a few scars along the boy’s back. He was so focused on the scars that he barely noticed when Yuto stopped playing until he saw the slender form stand up. Slowly Yuto walked to the small door that overlooked the mountain that lay just beyond, and he looked into the sky as if talking with the stars themselves. For a brief moment, Ryutaro felt such pity for him, and yet he didn’t know why. Yuto looked so sad… his pale white shoulder glowed with the light of the moon and the boy’s eyes were still dull.
“Anh!” Ryutaro fell backwards as Yuto turned to look at the door, and he felt their eyes lock. But as he tried to stand up the door slid open and Yuto stood before him, his Kimono still askew on his slender frame. He wore a pair of simple white pajama pants that tied together around his waist by a thin cord and as Ryutaro gulped and looked up at him. He noticed the battle marks along Yuto’s body and gulped again as the older boy slowly knelt down and offered his hand.
“Ryutaro-kun… are you okay?” Yuto said in barely above a whisper, his voice still tired, but firm.
“I-I u-uh… I wasn't spying on you…” Ryutaro managed as he tried to stand up again without Yuto’s help.
“I see…. Did I wake you?” Yuto asked as he turned around and walked back into the room.
“N-No! I… was just out…for a walk…” Ryutaro cursed himself as he realized he was somehow on the defensive part of this conversation.
“You’re very lucky…. To have lived such a peaceful life….” Yuto said as he lightly caressed a small flower arrangement in the corner of the room. Ryutaro blinked blankly as he took in the words, but understood nothing of their meaning. He squinted at the arrangement in the distance to see it as one of his own, the small arrangement with a single white rose standing amongst a tangle of greens.
“Dad….” Ryutaro mumbled.
“Wh-Whatever! I…. I will never accept this! And I.. I’ll never accept you as my brother!” Ryutaro grew infuriated as he felt so little right at that moment. He had no reason to be afraid of Yuto, but he was…..
With nothing else between the boys, Ryutaro stood up and stormed out of the room, not caring if he woke people up when he stomped back to his room.
Yuto sighed as for the first time that night, he left his posture relax and he shut the door to his room again. He lay down upon his own soft tatamis and closed his eyes as he thought about the boy that had just stormed out of his room and absolutely refused to acknowledge him.
---The Next Day---
Ryutaro ran out into the courtyard as he laughed with a couple of the boys that played with him during the day. Their mothers came to the Morimoto house for Ikebana lessons from Ryutaro’s father, and while they were in class, the boys were set free to wander and play.
“Hey! Give that back!” Ryutaro shouted as one of the boys grasped the ball that he had been holding. After the events of last night he was in no mood to play anything and just sat there.
“Well if you’re not going to ussssee it! It’s ours!” The boy who stole the ball made a face, mocking Ryutaro.
“I said give it back!” He tried again
“Or what!? You’ll throw some flowers at me?” The boy and his companions laughed.
“I-I’ll….” What did Ryutaro have that he could honestly threaten them with?
As he stumbled for a threat, the boys laughter died out as their eyes grew wide in terror. Ryutaro looked at them for a moment before realizing that they were looking at someone behind him.
“Wha-“ He turned to see Yuto standing behind him.
“H-Here!” The boy threw the ball at Ryutaro with all his might and ran off.
“Are you okay? Otouto-kun?” Yuto knelt again as he again offered a pale moon white hand.
“I’m fine! Just.. leave me alone!” Ryutaro insisted as he stood up again without the boy’s help and stormed off into the distance again. He didn’t know if he should be annoyed that his playmates were all scared off…. Or annoyed that Yuto talked as if they were really a family.
“Ah, Ryuu-Chan? Why aren’t you playing?” The door slid open as Aiko stepped in and began to quietly wipe down and dust the furniture in Ryutaro’s room.
“Stupid Yuto scared away all my friends…” He grumbled as he threw the ball he had been holding back into his closet.
“It’s not his fault…. I rather pity the boy….” Aiko sighed as she took to scrubbing a particular spot just outside the room.
“W-Why?” Ryutaro asked, suddenly curious.
“Well… after all that he’s been through… the poor soul…”
She looked at Ryutaro but found the young boy’s face still puzzled.
“O-Oh my….. You don't know?”
Ryutaro shook his head
“Yuto-kun…. Is a victim of circumstance… he hasn't been very fortunate in life…. When he was little…. he began to receive training…. And not the type of culture that you or I are used to, but rather… of the… “ She swallowed hard as she could barely choke out the last word
“What?” Ryutaro pursued
“Murderous… sort….”
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“Yuto-kun…. Is….. an no he was an….assassin…”
Ryutaro blinked as he froze right to the spot.
“Y-You’re kidding…. I-I don't believe that…”
“It wasn't by his choice…. His father pressured him and essentially treated him like…. Like a sword for hire….”
“You’re lying… right?”
“It was only last year that Yuto-kun’s father, the late Mr. Nakajima died. Supposedly, around that time, Yuto’s mother took over his life and freed him from….. that… world… and well… I don't know… but I know that they called him “The Snow”, he would always wear white, like he does now, and no one… none of his supposed targets have ever survived…..”
“H-How…do you know..”
“I’ve heard the talk between your father and Ms. Nakajima, I’ve heard the way people in town talk about him.. it’s not a joke Ryutaro-kun… you should be nicer to him, for life certainly hasn't been.” Aiko sighed as she picked up her rags and walked away to the next room.
Ryutaro sat quietly alone in his room for a moment as he let the new information sink in. He imagined Yuto the night that he saw him, reflecting upon the moon, and he realized it all made sense… he recognized the tired look in the boy’s eyes as those of someone who had been through so much he was tired…. Of life.
He didn't know what to do with this bit of knowledge now….. he wondered why things had developed the way they had, and he wondered if he should …. Apologize to the boy somehow… he hadn’t really done anything wrong afterall…
After making up his mind, Ryutaro stood up and slowly trekked his way to Yuto’s room again and knocked. He heard no steps within the room and sighed as he felt his resolve fading again. But just as he turned to walk away the door to the room slid open and Yuto stood before him again.
“Ryutaro-kun?” He asked quietly.
“I… I’m sorry okay?” Ryutaro spat out bluntly
“For what?”
“I… I don't know… I just am… “
“Ryutaro…” Yuto looked at the still shrinking boy that stood before him, their eyes never met as the younger boy kept his focused firmly on the ground.
“Are you… scared of me?” Yuto asked, his voice showing a bit of emotion for the first time
“N-no! I just uh…”
“Then I take it… you’ve heard about me…” Yuto said softly as he knelt down beside the boy again.
“I-Is it true?” Ryutaro asked, and he felt so childish again as he cursed himself.
“Yes… I used to be a very different person… but despite my past… Ryutaro….” Yuto stopped as he gently lifted the younger boy’s chin until their eyes met.
“Despite my past… I would never hurt you…. You’re my… cherished little brother…” Yuto smiled, and Ryutaro was taken aback as he saw for the first time just how bright Yuto could be.
“Why….?” Ryutaro wasn't sure if he was really asking anything now, but he found his eyes fixed on Yuto as he stood up.
“You know… it’s been almost a year since my father died…. He was the one…. Who started me into all this… do you remember what I said Ryutaro-kun? About how you were so lucky to have grown up so peacefully? Your hands have touched only the softest of silks and the prettiest of roses, you heard the sounds of waterfalls outside your room… where as I suffered through nights of screams and fights, my hands were, and still are, stained with blood that I cant wash off…. But when my father died…. He told me that he would take all the responsibility for my sufferings, that he was… sorry he had made me into who I am…and when he died… he told me to find that one thing in life that I wanted. I knew then… that I wanted…. A family. I wanted something that I could nurture, something that I could protect….. I’ve seen so much death Ryutaro…. And I’ve seen horrors you can only imagine…. When I see you…. I imagine the life that I could have had… I can see happiness in your eyes…. And I want to nurture that…” Yuto sighed as he sat down again.
“If only you would let me in….. I want to be your brother….but I wont force myself upon you…”
“I…I….” Ryutaro felt so ashamed at his conduct…. He had been acting like a spoiled brat this entire time towards Yuto….
“You don't have to answer me all at once…. You don't even have to call me Nii-chan, just…. whenever you’re ready….” Yuto said softly as he sat down on the floored tatami, the white kimono slipped off his shoulder again as he lay down upon the soft blankets.
“I…” Ryutaro didn't know what to say anymore…. And he turned around and left the room.
The next few days were awkward around the house. Ryutaro felt annoyed with the woman his father had married, but at the same time annoyed with himself, for letting something like this get to him. But now, whenever he looked at Yuto, another sensation overtook him… pity.
Yuto had never done anything wrong to him, but why was he so angry at him? The boy wanted to be his brother, but he could do nothing but push him away.
“Ryuu-kun, you’ll have to be careful where you zone out today, the people that are moving all the furniture at here today. They’ll be moving things around the house to make room for your mother’s things. Don’t get in their way okay?” Aiko smiled as Ryutaro grumbled again and walked off, finding another quiet place to ponder about his situation again.
Quietly he walked to his own courtyard, the small one lined with lush green trees and he stopped as he noticed a boy in the loose white kimono standing beneath his favorite tree. He could see Yuto’s hand touch against the base, as the taller boy looked up at the branches. The leaves that had fallen around him whipped around, dancing as if they had found a new friend, and Ryutaro scowled.
Blocking everything out of his mind, he managed enough concentration to walk to his room and close himself in. He liked being alone these days, the quiet helped him think, but he knew he couldn’t always shut himself away everyday.
“Maybe… just for today…. I should try a little harder…” Ryutaro sighed as he got up again and walked to the door. He wasn't sure where it wanted to go though, he had just gotten to his room and now….
“Ah! I’ll go to the kitchen… maybe… something to eat….” He wondered aloud again as he opened the door and poked his head out. Gently, as if he were afraid someone would catch him, he walked towards the kitchens, but as he did, his mind began to wonder again. This time, he found himself imagining all the things that Yuto had said.
He imagined horrible nights of tossing and turning to the sounds of people fighting, people screaming. He imagined having to kill someone….
Lastly, he imagined….. a family. He could see a bright and sunny day, and there he was running around until a taller boy tackled him playfully into the soft grasses and tickled him. Ryutaro smiled unconsciously as he felt Yuto’s arms around him and the older boy hugged him tightly. He felt… comfortable… loved…. Now his father would come with his mother at his side, and they’d take a picture of the two boys, giggling to themselves as their sons played together.
“I should….. be nicer to Yuto…” Ryutaro said finally, to no one but himself.
“Ryu-chan!” Aiko gasped as Ryutaro turned around to see two men lifting a heavy dresser behind him. One of the drawers was in the process of slipping out and hitting him in the head!
Ryutaro felt frozen to the spot, and he braced himself for the pain that was to come. Instead he felt something wrap around him and in a short instant he felt himself be pushed back a bit and finally the sounds of a loud thud, the sound of the drawer landing on the floor.
“Hnnh…” He let out and unconscious whimper as he opened his eyes. He saw a brilliant flash of white and his eyes opened all in an instant. Yuto had wrapped himself around him, and now, the older boy winced slightly as he slowly untangled his arms.
“Ryutaro-kun, are you okay?” Yuto asked, but Ryutaro stumbled. He didn't know what to say again…
“Ryuu-Chan! Are you okay!?” Aiko ran over inspecting the boy, and seeing that he was fine, she turned her attention to Yuto.
“Yuto-kun! You’re bleeding!” She nearly shrieked as she hurriedly pushed Yuto away in the direction of his room, saying she would need to bandage him up.
Ryutaro was left alone, standing in the corridor just outside his room, as the two men apologized, he stared at Yuto’s back, the silky white Kimono he always wore now had a growing red stain on the back. Suddenly…. He wasn’t so hungry anymore.
That night, Ryutaro lay in his room again, he didn't think it wise to go out again, especially during moving days. Instead, he busied himself with his flower arrangements, and his own calligraphy. He re-studied all of his past writings and in doing so, hours passed. He didn't noticed the hour until he heard a familiar melody in the air again.
Ryutaro got up now, and he winced as his legs had long fallen asleep. He felt the pinpricks of circulation returning, and stumbled his way to the door. The hallways were empty, the sounds of the men moving were now replaced by the familiar flute what wafted its way to his ears.
Gently he pressed his ears against the door to Yuto’s room and he closed his eyes as the melody calmed him. The song danced lightly around him, and then Ryutaro opened his eyes as he heard the sounds drop now. Once again into the soft sad notes it plunged and Ryutaro felt almost like crying.
“Ryutaro-kun, if you’d like, you can come in…..” Yuto called out, and Ryutaro wondered how he knew. Shamefully he opened the door and stepped in. Yuto never turned around to look at him. Ryutaro was taken aback as he walked in to find the slender boy with bandages wrapped all the way across his back, blood seeped through the bandages and formed a large red gash.
Once again, Ryutaro felt terrible. He slowly walked over to the pale white boy and sat down next to him.
“Ryutaro-kun, are you okay? You shouldn't be sneaking out at nights.” Yuto said calmly
“H-Hai….” Ryutaro nodded.
Yuto picked up his flute again and just before he began to play Ryutaro turned to face him
“I’m… sorry…and… thank you… Yuto-kun” He said bluntly.
He watched as a small grin appeared on Yuto’s face and the flute rested in his lap again.
“W-What?” Ryutaro questioned again as he wondered if he was perhaps a bit too blunt with his words.
“You called me by my name… it’s nice… to hear…” Yuto smiled to himself as he placed the flute down beside him now and he gazed at the moon.
“But you know, Ryutaro-kun, you should never have to thank me… or apologize… we are family now… this is what one family member does for another….” Yuto said, his voice drifting softly.
“B-But…I just wanted to…”
“If you wanted to repay me… would you let me… call you… Otouto?” Yuto asked, his eyes never leaving the night sky.
“U-un..” Ryutaro nodded as he wondered about the simplicity of Yuto’s request.
“Ja…. Otouto-kun… I’m glad you came to see me…” Yuto smiled again as he turned his gaze to Ryutaro again and as their eyes met, Ryutaro felt frozen in place again. Yuto’s eyes gleamed, the tired look he had seen just days before, seemed to be replaced… with…. Happiness.
“Yuto-kun, could I…. come and listen to you….. tomorrow?” Ryutaro asked sheepishly. He couldn't explain it, but he felt so…. at ease whenever he was around Yuto. He looked back and felt rather stupid about thinking too much.
“You’re always welcome…” Yuto beamed.
Just as the night began to quiet and settle, the heavens opened and drops of rain began their descent. The waters coursed through the tiles on the roof, landing in a steady stream onto the pebbled ground below.
“Otouto-kun, don’t go back to your room tonight. I don't want you to catch a cold walking in the courtyard in this rain…” Yuto said as Ryutaro began to get up.
“B-but..”
Yuto turned to him and without a word, nodded to the soft futon. Ryutaro understood but didn't move. Instead he chose to sit beside Yuto a little longer as the boy listened to the rain. Everything was so peaceful… even if Yuto didn't say a word, he felt so at ease.
Somewhere in the middle of the night, Ryutaro realized he must have fallen asleep as he woke back to semi-consciousness. He felt himself resting on Yuto’s shoulders, and the older boy was now gently laying him down on a futon. The silky wave of a blanket rushed over him and he felt warm again… he wanted to thank Yuto, but his body would not wake up to permit it.
Maybe having a brother….wouldn’t be so bad…
(>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<) (>’_’)><(‘_’<)
Sorry it took so long Minna! I hope you enjoyed the story! Once again, Comments are ALWAYS welcome, as I love hearing from you! The more the better the longer the better!
~Emmie