(no subject)
non existant, that basically describes me today. i feel like the only emotion i have is sadness. i cant even count all the times i felt like i was about to start crying today in school, and for no reason at all. i am sad for an unknown reason. i hate how people try to tell me how im feeling because they dont know at all. and i also hate how i look forward to something all weekend and it ends up being a total letdown, and then you will be letdown again this weekend. therefore i have nothing to look forward to this week. my plans are cancelled, i dont have a boyfriend to run to when everythings wrong and i just need a hug, hell i dont even have friends to run to this weekend. im gradually turning into someone no one wants to be around. i dont even want to be around me, let alone be me. what is going on with me? im always happy, why am i crying right now? i have no motivation towards anything i need to accomplish. i put myself down too much to motivate myself, telling myself bad things is just normal to me, when i did gymnastics larissa always told me bad things, i was never good enough to be one of her girls. she made me think i was a failure, and now it feels like i know i am a failure. everything is crashing down.