a return to livejournal? maybe.
so with winter break coming (blessedness) i may actually have time to update. maybe.
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christmas has gotten to me i think. i have a large list of individuals to get presents for, many of whom i don't want to give anything to, it is simply an obligation, which sounds terrible. i know it is reduntant rhetoric but this modern 'holiday' has nothing to do with 'good will toward men.' it's a packege of consumerism, buying people gifts 'cause if you didn't, they'd take offense. i am not insinuated that all who celebrate christmas are shallow slaves to 'the system' but i'm having a hard time figuring out what the hell 'christmas spirit' is anyumore.
the salvation army bell ringers seem to be getting it right. but they are a volunteering
minority subsisting off the 'generious' (pocket change for the poor??) donations of the affluent.
i don't know what solution or point i am looking for here, if one at all. the contradiction of 'suburban' and middle class life has my mind in a whirl.
can we be advocates of the oppressed, the marginalized, the downtroden with our bellies full, our self centered concerns of expensive education and our christmas lights/nativities/trees/etc sucking up precious energy all day and night?
white man's guilt? middle class shame?
is it idealistic (or pessimistic) to see anything short of feeding impovershed children at my table as below par, as far as community service goes?
the luxury of worrying about grades, paying bills and entertaining abstract theories makes me sick sometimes.
maybe the gifts to give aren't to someone, but rather in the spirit of the shared relationship, if that makes sense. giving money, time, resources in someone's name?
or maybe i am just taking this all too far.
i read about this monk, i believe it was benedict (correct me if i'm wrong here), who gave up a life of affluence in a merchant family to live and minister among the poor. there was a story about how he traded the clothes on his back with a man poorer than he, right there on the street. masochism? self-gradifying in the self-denial? nievely idealistic? maybe.
but he had a hell of a lot more balls then i do.
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christmas has gotten to me i think. i have a large list of individuals to get presents for, many of whom i don't want to give anything to, it is simply an obligation, which sounds terrible. i know it is reduntant rhetoric but this modern 'holiday' has nothing to do with 'good will toward men.' it's a packege of consumerism, buying people gifts 'cause if you didn't, they'd take offense. i am not insinuated that all who celebrate christmas are shallow slaves to 'the system' but i'm having a hard time figuring out what the hell 'christmas spirit' is anyumore.
the salvation army bell ringers seem to be getting it right. but they are a volunteering
minority subsisting off the 'generious' (pocket change for the poor??) donations of the affluent.
i don't know what solution or point i am looking for here, if one at all. the contradiction of 'suburban' and middle class life has my mind in a whirl.
can we be advocates of the oppressed, the marginalized, the downtroden with our bellies full, our self centered concerns of expensive education and our christmas lights/nativities/trees/etc sucking up precious energy all day and night?
white man's guilt? middle class shame?
is it idealistic (or pessimistic) to see anything short of feeding impovershed children at my table as below par, as far as community service goes?
the luxury of worrying about grades, paying bills and entertaining abstract theories makes me sick sometimes.
maybe the gifts to give aren't to someone, but rather in the spirit of the shared relationship, if that makes sense. giving money, time, resources in someone's name?
or maybe i am just taking this all too far.
i read about this monk, i believe it was benedict (correct me if i'm wrong here), who gave up a life of affluence in a merchant family to live and minister among the poor. there was a story about how he traded the clothes on his back with a man poorer than he, right there on the street. masochism? self-gradifying in the self-denial? nievely idealistic? maybe.
but he had a hell of a lot more balls then i do.