(no subject)
So much has happened since the last time I was here. I think I'll be posting almost exclusively from my phone from now on.
Somehow through many random twists and turns, I met R. Its really a long story. But in summary: G met L at the club, they bump into each other again 6 months later. R, who is L's cousin, started asking G about me on draw something. She gave him my number and at this stage, we've met thrice.
At first he was just a distraction that I welcomed. Getting to know a person is like that. Then suddenly, it sounds as if he was using me as a source of information for G. Although he denied it, I knew that I wasn't trusting him.
Then, he made me laugh. And we went out. The day he said I was uptight I got fucking angry. That was then I realized that I actually started caring for this person.
I was running scared. I wanted to bolt like a deer, racing for her life.
Of course, I don't know if he does, in fact, like me. What do all the little actions mean? Maybe nothing, he could just be a nice person in general. But still...
At this very moment, I'm still afraid. How many times have I been broken? How many times more can I put myself back together?
No, it's better for me to leave R untouched, whether he likes me or not. And I can do it, because I know my Self wouldn't want to inflict itself on an unscarred soul like him.
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.