the diaper
Leigh and I spent Friday afternoon doing some shopping. I needed to exchange some shoes in Niagara Falls at the outlet mall and look around for work clothes. I ended up getting two pairs of shoes and a George Foreman grill, but no work clothes. Leigh bought a little green boombox for the kitchen with a ipod attachments. Pretty cool..but as you can tell from the subject line, these were not the most interesting facts of my afternoon.
After conducting our business in the outlet mall in Niagara Falls, Leigh said we should hit Target and Walden Galleria on the way home to look for some things we didn't find in the outlet mall. Since all I had waiting for me at home were final papers and catching up on reading, I agreed heartily. So we went back to the car and loaded up our two bags. Got in, started the engine and started to pull out.
Leigh hit the breaks suddenly when we were halfway out of the parking space and said "What the hell is THAT?!" I looked around, checking to both sides, the earth, and the sky looking for something bizarre or frightening. I saw nothing. In fact, there was nobody in the parking lot walking to their cars or anything.
Confused I said, "What's what? What do you see?"
Leigh: "THAT!" pointing toward the front of the car.
That's when I saw it. It looked like a tightly bundled little package, square with rounded edges. Very similar to small bricks of cocaine you see in movies. It was white, but seemed to have some writing on it...
I looked closer, then said, "Huh, I think...wait, no way! No, IT IS! Leigh it's a DIAPER! UGH!"
....not just a diaper, but a soiled diaper wrapped up with its sticky sides securing its contents......
Leigh: "Ew! What do we do?!"
Me: "What the hell?!"
Leigh: "I wonder if we start driving if it'll just fall off?...."
Realizing immediately how embarrassing it would be no matter what point in our commute the diaper "just fell off", I decided to remove it myself. I got out of the car, fished out the folder I used for my Desmond arguments (blue, for Petitioner of course), and used it as a probe to knock the diaper off the front of the car. It fell with a hearty "thud" into the parking space adjacent to ours. I hopped back the in the car and we sped off, leaving behind us our humiliation at being treated like someone's Diaper Genie.
A few questions remain:
Did the diaper fall out of a diaper bag whilst the mother walked past my car?
Did someone just set the diaper there temporarily and forget about it, or was this an insult directed at my Yaris?
Was the diaper's original owner actually changed on the hood of my car?
Is the placing of a used, wrapped diaper on the hood of someone's car considered to be a friendly greeting to the people of Niagara Falls?
Perhaps we will never know.
After conducting our business in the outlet mall in Niagara Falls, Leigh said we should hit Target and Walden Galleria on the way home to look for some things we didn't find in the outlet mall. Since all I had waiting for me at home were final papers and catching up on reading, I agreed heartily. So we went back to the car and loaded up our two bags. Got in, started the engine and started to pull out.
Leigh hit the breaks suddenly when we were halfway out of the parking space and said "What the hell is THAT?!" I looked around, checking to both sides, the earth, and the sky looking for something bizarre or frightening. I saw nothing. In fact, there was nobody in the parking lot walking to their cars or anything.
Confused I said, "What's what? What do you see?"
Leigh: "THAT!" pointing toward the front of the car.
That's when I saw it. It looked like a tightly bundled little package, square with rounded edges. Very similar to small bricks of cocaine you see in movies. It was white, but seemed to have some writing on it...
I looked closer, then said, "Huh, I think...wait, no way! No, IT IS! Leigh it's a DIAPER! UGH!"
....not just a diaper, but a soiled diaper wrapped up with its sticky sides securing its contents......
Leigh: "Ew! What do we do?!"
Me: "What the hell?!"
Leigh: "I wonder if we start driving if it'll just fall off?...."
Realizing immediately how embarrassing it would be no matter what point in our commute the diaper "just fell off", I decided to remove it myself. I got out of the car, fished out the folder I used for my Desmond arguments (blue, for Petitioner of course), and used it as a probe to knock the diaper off the front of the car. It fell with a hearty "thud" into the parking space adjacent to ours. I hopped back the in the car and we sped off, leaving behind us our humiliation at being treated like someone's Diaper Genie.
A few questions remain:
Did the diaper fall out of a diaper bag whilst the mother walked past my car?
Did someone just set the diaper there temporarily and forget about it, or was this an insult directed at my Yaris?
Was the diaper's original owner actually changed on the hood of my car?
Is the placing of a used, wrapped diaper on the hood of someone's car considered to be a friendly greeting to the people of Niagara Falls?
Perhaps we will never know.