Conversation with my dad about HNGR
This is not exaggerated. This was our word-for-word conversation over dinner tonight.
Dad: So you're going to go somewhere safe, right?
Me: I mean... sure.
Dad: Because it's VERY important that you're safe.
Me: I promise they check out ALL the places before they send us.
Dad: OK, well, I want you to wear one of those GPS things. I'm going to buy you one.
Me: Um... okay... don't those use Internet?
Dad: I think they use satellites.
Me: Well, will that work in the jungle? (Side note: I am, by now, purposefully trying to get on his nerves, as I have no intention of going to "the jungle". I can be so mean :-))
Dad: (scared pause. This has not occurred to him) I don't know! If it doesn't, I don't think I want you going to the jungle, because I want you to wear one of those GPS things on you at all times. Would you wear a GPS thing if I bought you one?
Me: Um... sure.
(this is my favorite part:)
Dad (leaning forward, lowering his brow, and using his now-you-listen-here-young-lady voice): And I DON'T want you getting kidnapped!
(I'm totally serious, he said it just like that)
Me: Uhh... OK... I'll try really hard.
Dad: No doing anything with strangers.
Me: Well, I mean, if I was DOING something with them, then they couldn't be strangers, right?
Dad (getting agitated): Emmy! NO hanging out with people you don't know, I'm serious!
Me: Well, Dad, I'm just saying that if we DID something together, then we'd be friends, not strangers anymore, so... that'd be okay, right?
Dad: (flustered noises)
Me: Dad. I'm kidding. I promise I will not do anything with strangers.
Dad: I just don't want you going home with people you meet in bars.
(pause)
Me: Bars? (When have I ever gone to a bar?)
Dad: Or restaurants! Whatever, Emily, I just don't want you going home with people you don't know, all right?
Me: OK, Daddy, I promise. (I smile sweetly and reach over to reassuringly pat his hand)
Dad: (sits there looking miserable)
Me: Dad, aren't you HAPPY for me that I get to go?
Dad: Yes. (pause) Potentially.
Me: Did you guys not want me to get in?
Dad: Why, what did Mom say?
Me: That she definitely wanted me to get in, she just wanted me to decide I didn't want to go.
Dad: (sighs) Well... yes, I'd say that's about what I was hoping for.