(no subject)
Dear Journal,
I feel pretty much completely spent for this semester, these last twelve weeks haven't been too bad but the last few have just been dragging and dragging. I can't wait to jump on the train tomorrow and go home, I'm really really ready for it and I just feel like here I am just barely functioning and trying to pretend everything is fine.
I saw a different doctor today, it was a female rather than my regular other doctor. She was better than my regular doctor in the way she was explaining things. It was a similar consultation, same questions and suggestions about how I'm feeling and she prescribed me the same medication again. An interesting thing she said was that she thought it was probably genetic seeing as I've felt depressed for the last ten years or so with no reversal. And it's true; nothing I've ever done physically or psychologically has made much if any impact on me. So yeah I'm not sure.
And journal, I'll sound like a pathetic loser (more than I already do) but it kind of sucked a few days ago when I did it again for the first time in well a while. Yeah it helped, I was in some kind of strange trance type thing I couldn't get out of and this ended it, but to feel like I have to resort to it is rather pathetic; I guess I'm still young or something. Okay, well I need to eat this tub of ben and jerry's that is waiting for me and an episode of Gilmore Girls :)
I feel pretty much completely spent for this semester, these last twelve weeks haven't been too bad but the last few have just been dragging and dragging. I can't wait to jump on the train tomorrow and go home, I'm really really ready for it and I just feel like here I am just barely functioning and trying to pretend everything is fine.
I saw a different doctor today, it was a female rather than my regular other doctor. She was better than my regular doctor in the way she was explaining things. It was a similar consultation, same questions and suggestions about how I'm feeling and she prescribed me the same medication again. An interesting thing she said was that she thought it was probably genetic seeing as I've felt depressed for the last ten years or so with no reversal. And it's true; nothing I've ever done physically or psychologically has made much if any impact on me. So yeah I'm not sure.
And journal, I'll sound like a pathetic loser (more than I already do) but it kind of sucked a few days ago when I did it again for the first time in well a while. Yeah it helped, I was in some kind of strange trance type thing I couldn't get out of and this ended it, but to feel like I have to resort to it is rather pathetic; I guess I'm still young or something. Okay, well I need to eat this tub of ben and jerry's that is waiting for me and an episode of Gilmore Girls :)