Grieving
My friend Bek left for Colorado by way of Roswell, NM tonight. We spent all evening packing up her two storage pod things plus her dad's truck and doing her final apartment cleaning. Oh, and we stuffed so much into her little two-door Civic you would not even begin to believe me if I told you what all was in there. Let's just say that L and I both screamed, "Don't open that door!" as she tried to open her passenger door. And if she picks up alien knickknacks in Roswell... well... they'll have to be really really small.
It's been such a sad lead-up to her leaving. She showed up out of the blue two years ago, having moved to Austin on a whim. I happened to be the only one at the place where we worked the same age. We hit it off immediately. Two years of good friendship--her pushing me to be more active and social and me rebelling at every turn. Suddenly, she got bored and decided she needed to move to Colorado (her mom, stepdad, and aunt are up there, so it's not a total solo move). Literally, this happened at the end of December. And she left tonight. So sad. I've been even more depressed than usual lately grieving for the loss of a good friend. My plea to her was, "Now who am I going to go to clubs and pick up guys with? And who's going to drag me kicking and screaming from my house and motivate me to exercise more?" Didn't work.
Her friend (and my new friend since we're banding together with the loss) L threw her a going away party on Saturday night. It was very nice. I got to see people I'd only met once before, so I can say I've seen them at least twice now when I run into them again at YAP events. There was the requisite creepy guy (whose name I've completely blocked) who seemed to keep trying to find things he had in common with me. Um. Dude. You wear Birkenstocks and have hair longer than mine pulled back in a nappyass ponytail. No. A bazillion times no. I may be in that post-break-up desperate to be loved stage, but I'd rather chew off my own hand then be stared at by this guy. Correction: leered at. Anyway... We drank. Bek was goofy as always. This guy only L knew kinda sorta because of YAP brought out this Belgian beer fermented with peaches. OMFG this is the best. drink. ever. Even for non-beer drinkers (which I'm not - seems to stun most guys... I don't get that. What is it? Just because I have an XX not an XY I can't enjoy Guinness properly?) this one is super-yummy. You know how with a chocolate lager you'll get heavy BEER! flavor and then just the tiniest bit of chocolate! aftertaste? This is the exact opposite. PEACH! with a hint of beer. I loved it. I'm a fruity wine person. Now I can be a fruity beer person, too! But, I digress. I met a lawyer, who is very excellent and a lovely person to chat with, though thoroughly taken by someone I hope to become better friends with, so completely off-limits. Oh, L's a kitty person! She has two: one's black, long-haired, fluffy, vain, and smart as hell. The other is supposedly a black/white tuxedo, but she's so scaredy we saw no sign she existed at all. And L has this spiffy litterbox. Bek likened it to a cement mixer. L says that she's found it much more reliable than the Littermaid (she burned through three of them before she stumbled upon this one). All in all, we had a great time.
Tonight, Bek asked us to show up at her place at around 5 to help her load stuff into her two storage unit thingies. You know, those deals where they deliver the box; you fill the box; they pick up the box, store it, and then deliver it to wherever you need it later. Turns out she could have really done better with three... or two of the larger ones. Live and learn. I got there late because I was finishing up her going away present - a giant knitted afghan. She's become totally addicted to my hand-made scarves so I thought I'd give her the afghan/blanket I'd been working on for about 6 months (it had no designated person to go to, it was just something to occupy my hands while watching TV). It's this lovely yarn that's chenille and a very soft eyelash that just makes it fuzzy and warm. My right hand is aching right now, but I feel like I have to get all of this out while it's fresh. So anyway, she LOVED her present. She put it in the front seat of her car to sleep with. Of course, the guys wanted to use it as padding for the storage containers. Bek and I both screamed, "NO!!" After hauling numerous loads of little boxes and things up and down the two flights of stairs to her third floor apartment (or would it be three, technically, if it curves in the middle of the second set of stairs?) I will feel like I have buns o' steel for days. After clearing out everything we went to L's house to drop off Bek's car. L realized today that Bek hadn't seen the view from our Mt. Bonnell at night - which I have to say I hadn't seen before tonight (since you're not supposed to) - and we knew that her belongings would be safer in L's complex than in the dark at the park. It's Austin's highest peak. You get this panoramic view of the river running through town all the way to downtown. It's lovely. And the difference in the air quality from the parking lot up the frickin 99 steps to the top is the difference between some stars and a bunch. Betelgeuse as just a blah twinkly star and a red one. It was spiffy. We got back to L's and said our final goodbyes to Bek. Oh. So. Sad. She decided that instead of sleeping tonight and leaving in the morning she'd just drive west all night. Crazy freak woman. We tried to convince her that it's nothing but desert and nothingness in between here and New Mexico. She wouldn't listen. I told her to call me if she wanted to talk. If she got bored, or freaked, or whatever. And to call me when she got to alien territory. After L and I watched her pull out of the parking lot, we exchanged phone numbers and discussed how long Bek would actually last before pooping out for the night. I'm saying Junction (which is where I-10 meets US-290 - a.k.a. Bumfuck, TX - a.k.a. The Middle of NOWHERE) which is about two hours from here. Poor Bek. She looked hurt when we laughed at her after she declared she was reaching Roswell in 7 hours. Yeah. If a UFO took her there. Otherwise, I'm betting more like 10, at least. I just want her to get there safely, no matter how long it takes. West Texas is a hell hole. Rattlesnakes, desert, drug runners, inbred redneck hicks. It's scary out there. I would not want to drive it alone. She's a brave, brave woman.
I promised to call her at noon tomorrow if I didn't hear from her sooner. Good thing is that we both have Sprint, so there's that whole free mobile-to-mobile thing. And I have her e-mail address. And I'm making new friends, like L and M. It's just not quite the same.
Speaking of grieving, Craig Ferguson just gained a gadjillion points in my book (I certainly respect him now more than Conan). His father just died from cancer. Like, just the other day (I missed exactly when). So, instead of taking a week or whatever to grieve, he decided to have a wake on air. It was amazing. In place of his monologue was the most touching, wonderful eulogy. His guests were Dr. Drew Pinsky, Amy Yasbeck, and the Wicked Tinkers. Dr. Drew put on his "I'm not a psychiatrist but I play one on the radio" hat and was really a good friend, too, talking to Craig about his father and his beliefs about the afterlife, etc. He bonded with Amy over the grief of losing someone close to you. The Wicked Tinkers are a Scottish Highland group. As the credits were about to roll, Craig took up the sticks and drum and beat a tune out for the old man. I cried.The last time a comedy talk show host left me with such a profound sense of wow was Dave right after Sept. 11, 2001. There's something about watching someone you know as a funny man stripped bare that is so moving. I realized only after the show ended that I had been sitting glued to the TV with my chin in my hands the entire hour.
Also, dealing with grieving... the scene from Grey's Anatomy last night with Meredith and the old ladies? And then Meredith in the supply closet with Derek? I was sobbing. But, just as Mere was fine after a few minutes, so was I. It was leftover raw grief from losing Granmom, I think.
BTW, I have totally not proofread this thing, so if there are any errors...tough.
Wow. Okay. So that was a lot of heavy stuff for one post. Here's something I think will make up for it:
Die from cuteness!