Update time!
I have discovered that, at the moment, I am the most rational, level-headed person in the house. This is a very weird state of events... Mom flipped out on me the other day, and Sis is mega stressed about school.
I found out yesterday that fucking Social Security denied my claims a year ago and never let me know that. Mainly because their two systems - disability versus Social Security Insurance - don't interface and thus the disability claim got denied, but the SSI didn't. So I never got the denial letter telling me I needed to do something. Turns out that there was a piece of very important paper I didn't get because it was sent during the time where the Post Office didn't deliver our mail to our house, but to that other house miles away with the nearly identical address. Thus, they couldn't talk to my doctors to get the information that would tell them if I was actually sick enough to be disabled, and so they denied it based on lack of evidence. ARG. Now I'm waiting on my denial letter so I can then go to the SSA office (which has moved to right down the highway, about 10 minutes down the road, which is AWESOME) and fill out all of my paperwork in front of someone. That way, I don't have to worry I missed something. (I've also let Mom and Sis know that I will be the one responsible for checking the mail from now on... they would check it and throw the things somewhere in their car which became black holes... I found a piece of important mail in Mom's car the other day that was sent in mid-February. HOLY CROW.)
I have also decided that, once again, I'm going to use the money that Dad and Janice gave me for Christmas to pay for a class at the local community college this summer. I've asked Mom to buy me the papasan chair pad I was going to buy as a trade. She found that fair. Very cool.
I spent all of yesterday afternoon out on the back porch reading and enjoying the weather. It was in the mid-70s with a light breeze that was significantly cooler. The sun was out, but covered by high clouds every now and then so it wasn't that bad. I picked roses from the strange random rosebush we have in the backyard and created a little nosegay for the kitchen. If only I knew where the cord was to hook my camera up to the computer so you could see the pictures. Grr.
Cole has become an escape artist and squishes himself out the door to the front yard at every opportunity. Yesterday, he did so and immediately went to the unknown flowering bush that we're all allergic to and rolled around in the pollen and fallen flowers until his black and white fur turned yellow. He knows he's being bad, but he does it anyway. Mom and I are discussing getting him a harness and a leash so he can go out into nature, but where we can control him somewhat. I tried to wipe off most of the pollen, but after 8 wet paper towels that turned bright yellow, I gave up. He wanted to cuddle last night, but I told him that he couldn't until he stopped smelling like the bush that makes me sneeze. What's sweet/sad is that Andy's allergic to the pollen, too, but he tried to help clean Cole last night... he'd lick him for a minute, sneeze, and then lick some more. It was cute.
OMG... I seriously seriously wish that the neighbors on both sides of our house weren't so freaking OCD about their lawns. I really hate listening to weed whackers and leaf blowers.
Therapy's working well... I'm feeling really decent right now. Stable and not that moody. Stuff that would trigger annoyance and then yelling in me before I can now just dismiss and let go without feeling anything. That is such a big step, seriously. I'm finally really learning how to combat all of the big huge Borderline symptoms I used to have. Love it.
So... yeah. That's me right now.
I found out yesterday that fucking Social Security denied my claims a year ago and never let me know that. Mainly because their two systems - disability versus Social Security Insurance - don't interface and thus the disability claim got denied, but the SSI didn't. So I never got the denial letter telling me I needed to do something. Turns out that there was a piece of very important paper I didn't get because it was sent during the time where the Post Office didn't deliver our mail to our house, but to that other house miles away with the nearly identical address. Thus, they couldn't talk to my doctors to get the information that would tell them if I was actually sick enough to be disabled, and so they denied it based on lack of evidence. ARG. Now I'm waiting on my denial letter so I can then go to the SSA office (which has moved to right down the highway, about 10 minutes down the road, which is AWESOME) and fill out all of my paperwork in front of someone. That way, I don't have to worry I missed something. (I've also let Mom and Sis know that I will be the one responsible for checking the mail from now on... they would check it and throw the things somewhere in their car which became black holes... I found a piece of important mail in Mom's car the other day that was sent in mid-February. HOLY CROW.)
I have also decided that, once again, I'm going to use the money that Dad and Janice gave me for Christmas to pay for a class at the local community college this summer. I've asked Mom to buy me the papasan chair pad I was going to buy as a trade. She found that fair. Very cool.
I spent all of yesterday afternoon out on the back porch reading and enjoying the weather. It was in the mid-70s with a light breeze that was significantly cooler. The sun was out, but covered by high clouds every now and then so it wasn't that bad. I picked roses from the strange random rosebush we have in the backyard and created a little nosegay for the kitchen. If only I knew where the cord was to hook my camera up to the computer so you could see the pictures. Grr.
Cole has become an escape artist and squishes himself out the door to the front yard at every opportunity. Yesterday, he did so and immediately went to the unknown flowering bush that we're all allergic to and rolled around in the pollen and fallen flowers until his black and white fur turned yellow. He knows he's being bad, but he does it anyway. Mom and I are discussing getting him a harness and a leash so he can go out into nature, but where we can control him somewhat. I tried to wipe off most of the pollen, but after 8 wet paper towels that turned bright yellow, I gave up. He wanted to cuddle last night, but I told him that he couldn't until he stopped smelling like the bush that makes me sneeze. What's sweet/sad is that Andy's allergic to the pollen, too, but he tried to help clean Cole last night... he'd lick him for a minute, sneeze, and then lick some more. It was cute.
OMG... I seriously seriously wish that the neighbors on both sides of our house weren't so freaking OCD about their lawns. I really hate listening to weed whackers and leaf blowers.
Therapy's working well... I'm feeling really decent right now. Stable and not that moody. Stuff that would trigger annoyance and then yelling in me before I can now just dismiss and let go without feeling anything. That is such a big step, seriously. I'm finally really learning how to combat all of the big huge Borderline symptoms I used to have. Love it.
So... yeah. That's me right now.