Renew
Title: Renew
Pairing: Jaesu
Rating: PG-13
Summary: He needed to go the lowest just to be lifted and renewed.
A/N: I must say… I just write it down and check it a little. If is messy… I'm sorry… damn the benadryl for making me drowsy. I'm just post it and tomorrow check it once again. If I don't post it now I know myself I wont post it other day. So so so sorry.
"To touch a sore is to renew one's grief" by Terence
You were heartbroken. Your mind keeps on repeating with brutality all those words that stab your heart, killing it. You were depress and you love singing the sadder songs you could find. You wrote songs that could make anyone cry. Sad words, sad vocals, sad soul. You thought the members didn’t know the way you felt, well more like you choose to believe that they didn’t know you were. It was less painful to drown yourself in sorrow that to drown every people that care about you. You try to keep the joyful atmosphere around you sucking every happiness you didn’t have. In the end you were the mood maker and everyone expect that… cheerfulness pouring out of you. So you try to not care that your heart twitch every time you laugh when deep inside you heart was crying. That it was gasping for air every time you say all those lame jokes and random thoughts. That it was trying so hard to grab a hold of your soul every time you dance joyfully, singing with a passion that it was long ago dead and all those words of concern for your band mates because simply you were giving things you didn’t have.
It's clear that you are empty, just a shell with absolutely nothing to give, share or keep. Emptiness inside during the day covers with the dolphin laugh that everyone loves, emptiness all around you in the nights. Swimming the endless tears your swollen eyes pour. And you woke to go through the same routine, the same screaming of your pour heart that you try harder to forget them, just to shut them out. Each day was harder to bear, each morning you wake up with a dreadful wish to just not wake up, every night you close your eyes wishing just for someone or something to end your life.
In the middle of this self pity there was this one person who was always looking out for you. Asking you if you needed something, trying his best to make you smile even just a tiny one. Making himself sure you were sleeping, eating, and resting. In a way you didn’t see that much he was trying to heal your broken heart when he told you how great you were. Admiring your singing skills and telling you how awesome you did. In time you let him wash away the hurt in your heart with light kisses around your face, with light almost unseen touches around your body. He paint colors around you life and not the once you see in fairy tales, no, this colors were real, you can touch them. The black of his hair, the white of his skin, the different colors of his outfits, and the metallic gray of his ear rings. The light pink on his cheeks at the end of a hot damn good and sexy sex. He brought scent to your life too. The scent of his daily perfume, the masculine smell of his body while you two had sex, the sweet scent of his recent washed hair, the clean scent of his smooth skin. And finally he brought different words to your mouth. Clear sentences could be heard from your voice, cheerful notes escape every now and then from your throat.
"I love you" escape from your mouth and his face stiff for a second just to be broken by a sweet smile of his. "I love you too" you heard his sweet husky voice. Sometimes people needed to touch deep on the hole they are to see the good around them. He was the good around you. You were glad that you went so low just to be pull out by the greatest hyung you have… the one you love, the one that renew you.
Pairing: Jaesu
Rating: PG-13
Summary: He needed to go the lowest just to be lifted and renewed.
A/N: I must say… I just write it down and check it a little. If is messy… I'm sorry… damn the benadryl for making me drowsy. I'm just post it and tomorrow check it once again. If I don't post it now I know myself I wont post it other day. So so so sorry.
"To touch a sore is to renew one's grief" by Terence
You were heartbroken. Your mind keeps on repeating with brutality all those words that stab your heart, killing it. You were depress and you love singing the sadder songs you could find. You wrote songs that could make anyone cry. Sad words, sad vocals, sad soul. You thought the members didn’t know the way you felt, well more like you choose to believe that they didn’t know you were. It was less painful to drown yourself in sorrow that to drown every people that care about you. You try to keep the joyful atmosphere around you sucking every happiness you didn’t have. In the end you were the mood maker and everyone expect that… cheerfulness pouring out of you. So you try to not care that your heart twitch every time you laugh when deep inside you heart was crying. That it was gasping for air every time you say all those lame jokes and random thoughts. That it was trying so hard to grab a hold of your soul every time you dance joyfully, singing with a passion that it was long ago dead and all those words of concern for your band mates because simply you were giving things you didn’t have.
It's clear that you are empty, just a shell with absolutely nothing to give, share or keep. Emptiness inside during the day covers with the dolphin laugh that everyone loves, emptiness all around you in the nights. Swimming the endless tears your swollen eyes pour. And you woke to go through the same routine, the same screaming of your pour heart that you try harder to forget them, just to shut them out. Each day was harder to bear, each morning you wake up with a dreadful wish to just not wake up, every night you close your eyes wishing just for someone or something to end your life.
In the middle of this self pity there was this one person who was always looking out for you. Asking you if you needed something, trying his best to make you smile even just a tiny one. Making himself sure you were sleeping, eating, and resting. In a way you didn’t see that much he was trying to heal your broken heart when he told you how great you were. Admiring your singing skills and telling you how awesome you did. In time you let him wash away the hurt in your heart with light kisses around your face, with light almost unseen touches around your body. He paint colors around you life and not the once you see in fairy tales, no, this colors were real, you can touch them. The black of his hair, the white of his skin, the different colors of his outfits, and the metallic gray of his ear rings. The light pink on his cheeks at the end of a hot damn good and sexy sex. He brought scent to your life too. The scent of his daily perfume, the masculine smell of his body while you two had sex, the sweet scent of his recent washed hair, the clean scent of his smooth skin. And finally he brought different words to your mouth. Clear sentences could be heard from your voice, cheerful notes escape every now and then from your throat.
"I love you" escape from your mouth and his face stiff for a second just to be broken by a sweet smile of his. "I love you too" you heard his sweet husky voice. Sometimes people needed to touch deep on the hole they are to see the good around them. He was the good around you. You were glad that you went so low just to be pull out by the greatest hyung you have… the one you love, the one that renew you.