Venting - Nothing to See Here
Guuuuuuuh. I just feel gross today and there's no good reason for it. I had a lovely time at a theme park with my tour partner and another tour team last night, then this morning we met a bunch of other teams at the Mall of America. I used up all my "people points" yesterday and was frustrated by being in such a big group (8 of us) when there were really only one or two people there I found interesting enough to spend time with, then I followed the group around the mall and we left. I didn't get to go to the stores I'm interested in because I didn't want to divert the whole group, but I also didn't want to go to many of the places we went and just felt awkward and like a little kid tagging along. I would've loved to go off by myself for a while, but A) my partner and I had established that we were just stopping at a couple places and leaving because neither of us wanted to be there long, so I didn't want to mess up our plans and B) my feet still hurt from the theme park last night. (I'd done a show and a load-out that day already and my shoes weren't very supportive - I don't have trouble walking, those specific shoes just weren't a great day for spending 12 hours almost straight on my feet.) And it's frustrating because there are places I can only visit at that mall - they don't exist anywhere I live - and this is probably my last summer here, and I don't even like shopping so it would be nice to get to go to the few places I do enjoy, but we probably won't be at the mall again.
And then we get to our hotel, which is in Wisconsin (and I've rarely had good experiences in Wisconsin but was trying to be hopeful), and we're not booked the full time we're supposed to be and can't get the final night we should have because the property is already full, and the girl at the counter was very terse both about our incorrectly booked reservation (she acted like we were asking to extend rather than pointing out a mistake) and needing our IDs (I tried to explain that they wouldn't help her verify who we were because it was under a company name - I was happy to give it to her, I just didn't want her to be confused - and she got all, "well, I'm just doing what I'm trained to do," and I'm sure she's just had a stressful day but ugh), and then I get to my room and it smells like old people and doesn't have a fridge or microwave, which means that I'm either going to have to spend more than I like to get food from the gas station that's the only thing nearby or eat, like, crackers all week. And there's a pool, which is AWESOME, but there's a wrestling tournament in town and listening to teenage boys make smartass comments about me in a swimsuit is all I need right now. So it's just a wreck.
And I feel like my tour partner thinks I'm a crazy bitch (not in general, just because I've been irritated by rude customer service people all last week and now this lady and am beyond over it), but I just...I'm homesick for the South. Not my family, specifically, but I miss the culture. I know there's lots of troublesome stuff that's part of it, but all I want when something is wrong is some fucking empathy. Like, last week I tried to get a money order at a grocery store service desk (most do them), and had this conversation:
Me: Excuse me, do you all do money orders here?
Lady: No.
Me: Oh, okay - do you know if the bank branch in here does?
Lady: Ask them.
Like, would it be so fucking hard to say, "No, sorry, we don't," or, "You know, I'm not sure, but they're currently open, so they'd be able to tell you"? I didn't realize how region-specific the customer service I was trained to offer (and expect) was, and I miss it. I'm a very nice person to deal with as a customer, I'm not difficult or demanding, but I'm so over people being assholes about simple requests. I don't even need people to tell me yes, just be a human being while telling me no. I find people stressful anyway, and when 6/10 people I'm dealing with regularly are assholes it's just exhausting.
So, everything feels gross and grey, and I don't know what to do about it, but I'll deal. I'm sure I'm just tired and will feel better after I sleep.