More on Want vs. Need

[emberleo]

I've gone back and read to myself my own writings on the subject, initially, because I needed the reminder, and because I've learned more.

First of all, I regularly declare that I would rather be wanted than needed. I already explained that in the post I linked above.

To elaborate on the observation that "need is not personal",

Comments

[emberleo]

*shakes head* Not in my world. I don't understand where the consequence you percieve is coming from. Embarassment is the worst consequence of not connecting that I can come up with, and embarassment is one of those internally-generated things. It's utterly surviveable, and with practice, can be avoided all together. Like falling down - if I trip and fall, unless I'm in physical pain, I usually bust up laughing. Back when I first cultivated that habit, I was both embarassed AND amused. These days I'm just amused.

Second of all, when it comes to specifically romantic love, I don't believe I need that. I want it tremendously, but love is love, and if I have enough platonic love and companionship in my life, I don't specifically NEED a romantic relationship with a man.

So falling in love is something I am willing to wait for. But I don't wait for delivery. I go out into the world to see what there is to see, just not for the specific purpose of Love-shopping. I pull my lovers from my pool of friends, and I am always shopping for friends. In fact, I should STOP shopping for friends, because I no longer have time to care for my current supply properly! *sigh*

--Ember--