"Walking in This World" week 5, task 3 - Invest in Yourself Energetically
(copyright Julia Cameron)
Sometimes it takes a little sleuthing to actually see our self-destructive patterns. We are so enculturated to "not be selfish" that we may have difficulty setting aside the demands and expectations of others/ Our own artist may be so concerned with helping to caretake other artists, we may find our stores of optimism depleted. When we reach for our inner resources, we find that our inner well has run dry, wuite simply tapped too many times to help others.
Set aside a solid half-hours writing time. You are going to write - and receive - a letter from your artist's best friend suggesting you make a few simple changes.
The writer of your letter intends nothing but good and has been watching you and how you lead your life for a long time. There will be some simple suggestions - "get more sleep" - and some complicated suggestions - "see less of Annie". Some of the ideas are going to be surprisingly do-abe - "take a life drawing class" - and others will require more thought - "you need new friends". Allow your letter writer to say watever is needed to bring you to reality in ways that you chronically sell yourself short. At the end of the half hour read your letter carefully.
I did this exercise, but I did it in my artist pages. There were two reasons for this. First of all, it wound up being almost three pages of typed text, which I thought was a little extreme for a livejournal post, even with the expedient of putting it behind a cut. Second, and more important, however, is that the letter contains some very personal issues for me - issues I really don't want to share with the world in general. Issues that are properly between me and me, and really nobody else. If there is one thing I learned from the "Artist's Way" exercises its that not only is the publishing of some of the details about my inner thought process tawdry, self-serving, and boring, it actually works at cross purposes with ehe exercise because I can't separate out the idea that I am writing for an audience, and in this case I should be writing just for me and all the rest of the world be damned.
I found the exercise to be somewhat stressful to do, but ultimately relaxing in that way that letting out a long-held secret can be relaxing. At the same time, after some initial dumping, it was nice to know that there has been some growth as well. As stated in the exercise, there are some very do-able changes that I can be working on right now, and that gives me hope. Bigger problems will require more thought and energy, and some may only be mitigated, not solved, but even big problems can be handled when broken down into smaller problems, so once I have some of the smaller, niggling problems out of the way I will have more mental space to grapple with, and break down, the larger problems.
I know that I encourage people to do all the exercises that I am doing, but I REALLY recommend that you try this one. Seriously. Half an hour worth of time. Shut down your Facebook and your e-mail and your Skype. Don't answer the phone. Write for half an hour. I assure you that you will learn something.
Sometimes it takes a little sleuthing to actually see our self-destructive patterns. We are so enculturated to "not be selfish" that we may have difficulty setting aside the demands and expectations of others/ Our own artist may be so concerned with helping to caretake other artists, we may find our stores of optimism depleted. When we reach for our inner resources, we find that our inner well has run dry, wuite simply tapped too many times to help others.
Set aside a solid half-hours writing time. You are going to write - and receive - a letter from your artist's best friend suggesting you make a few simple changes.
The writer of your letter intends nothing but good and has been watching you and how you lead your life for a long time. There will be some simple suggestions - "get more sleep" - and some complicated suggestions - "see less of Annie". Some of the ideas are going to be surprisingly do-abe - "take a life drawing class" - and others will require more thought - "you need new friends". Allow your letter writer to say watever is needed to bring you to reality in ways that you chronically sell yourself short. At the end of the half hour read your letter carefully.
I did this exercise, but I did it in my artist pages. There were two reasons for this. First of all, it wound up being almost three pages of typed text, which I thought was a little extreme for a livejournal post, even with the expedient of putting it behind a cut. Second, and more important, however, is that the letter contains some very personal issues for me - issues I really don't want to share with the world in general. Issues that are properly between me and me, and really nobody else. If there is one thing I learned from the "Artist's Way" exercises its that not only is the publishing of some of the details about my inner thought process tawdry, self-serving, and boring, it actually works at cross purposes with ehe exercise because I can't separate out the idea that I am writing for an audience, and in this case I should be writing just for me and all the rest of the world be damned.
I found the exercise to be somewhat stressful to do, but ultimately relaxing in that way that letting out a long-held secret can be relaxing. At the same time, after some initial dumping, it was nice to know that there has been some growth as well. As stated in the exercise, there are some very do-able changes that I can be working on right now, and that gives me hope. Bigger problems will require more thought and energy, and some may only be mitigated, not solved, but even big problems can be handled when broken down into smaller problems, so once I have some of the smaller, niggling problems out of the way I will have more mental space to grapple with, and break down, the larger problems.
I know that I encourage people to do all the exercises that I am doing, but I REALLY recommend that you try this one. Seriously. Half an hour worth of time. Shut down your Facebook and your e-mail and your Skype. Don't answer the phone. Write for half an hour. I assure you that you will learn something.