Fic: All the PI’s Men (Logan/Veronica, Ensemble) NC-17 (2/7)
Title: “All the PI’s Men”
Author: em2mb
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica, Mac, Keith, Weevil, Wallace, Piz, Sacks.
Word Count: 10,135
Rating: NC-17, some of the good kind, some of the not-so-good kind.
Summary: “He just didn’t seem like the type,” Mac said flatly. Finally, she allowed her boyfriend to wrap his arms around her. “Right?”
( Read more... )
Author: em2mb
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica, Mac, Keith, Weevil, Wallace, Piz, Sacks.
Word Count: 10,135
Rating: NC-17, some of the good kind, some of the not-so-good kind.
Summary: “He just didn’t seem like the type,” Mac said flatly. Finally, she allowed her boyfriend to wrap his arms around her. “Right?”
( Read more... )
You've managed to keep this story moving sooooo quickly. There aren't any lulls at all in this piece. So many details--all of them brilliant--continue to draw me in.
"Now, he feared the DNA results that would prove just how much more suffering he’d inflicted on the poor girl before ending her life."-- fantastic build up of suspense here...makes me cringe to think what this means for Logan.
"Two matches. The blood on the knife was Veronicas; the semen on the seat, Logan’s."--I love this sentence--the structure of it is SO powerful. Damn.
"She palmed the length of his erection, and his hips rose to the sensation. He kicked the window slightly as he struggled to get his pants down, and she glared.
“I offered my suite,” Logan said indignantly"---Aw man, I loved this entire scene. Partly because we never got this on the show and it's so wonderful to see them together and HONEST with each other. This teasing banter here really captures their relationship AND so does that lovely little section when she says she loves him and he thinks he's the one to have said it b/c he's always the one to do so. Egads, I loved that.
Your reporter guy and his "story" was perfectly placed in this chapter. Even this unknown guy captured my interest.
"Max continued to scroll through his cell phone. “Italian? We haven’t had Luigi’s in-” He stopped abruptly. “Right. Mexican? You liked the spinach enchiladas from-” --Loved this, it felt so natural. I loved the sudden stumble, the sudden reminder that V is gone.
" if only (if only if only if only) she were still alive," Gorgeous; love the "if only" repetition...and I loved Mac's encouraging little offer to Logan, to make her believe.
In the Dick scene, I was trying to find the quotes I wanted to specifically identify and it's impossible b/c I love everything about the entire exchange between Dick & Logan. Man, I've actually missed Dick. Who knew?
The River Styx scene TOTALLY worked for me. It was so believable and so edgy. I thought Logan's wildly flying fist STILL connecting with something was SO LOGAN. It's not as if he's always the most graceful of fighters. He always looks as if he's going to tip over himself. Of course, I WANT to see them back at the grand. Don't tease me this way.
Also, you've actually made me feel TERRIBLE for Backup. Backup needs love too and it breaks my heart that Keith is ignoring him. Speaking of Keith and the V scene, I feel like such a fool for not seeing the ghostly visit coming. I was actually surprised and now I feel foolish. It really fit that scene so well. That conversation between K & V? PERFECTION. Seriously. You completely channeled Veronica's voice/attitude in that scene. The tenderness, the spunk, the attitude, the humor. All of it. Of course, then you have to crush me with the sad K & V scene at the end. :( I really liked Keith's confronting her for her foolishness and the accountability he places on himself. He is partly to blame and I appreciate his ability to realize that she can't possibly change overnight.
You did it again, Elle. You captured VM as it was during the good old days. Is it too much to hope for a Veronica ghostly visit with Logan? Please...
Let me say again--dark and twisty this is, but it's also fantastically written and wonderfully paced. I still wish V weren't dead, but you can't have everything, right?
Can't wait to read the next part. :)
Reply
The sentence about the DNA was a last minute addition. I wanted to clarify what I meant by "two matches," and that structure just worked. It got penciled right in.
I felt like I needed some kind of a sweet scene before everything went to hell, and I realized it worked in the context. On the other hand, I suppose it makes it that much worse, that they could have an awesome moment like that and her die before he ever got a chance to make things work between them.
Heh, I like (hate?) Mark Jarvis. He's a little shout out to everything I hate about journalism today. He's overdone and cheesy, and exactly how I want him. He'll be back, no worries.
I really wish VM hadn't have gotten cancelled before we got to see much Max/Mac. They could have been fun. And I totally agree - it's those little moments where you just are like, oh damn because whoever is gone.
I oddly find myself missing Dick, too. I kind of remember him in the context "everyone made up different stories in 1x21 to cover their own ass, and he didn't really leave Beaver in that wrong with her," which helps. I think there may be a little extra Dick thrown into the scenes I hadn't written yet b/c I miss him, even if it's not enough to give him a starring role.
You will see them back at the Grand! In a few chapters. *smiles evilly*
I really feel bad about Backup after today, which I spent with my brother picking up his new puppy. We spent 12 hours in a car, and we're both still alive, but PUPPY. And I was mean to poor Backup. But I felt like he'd be one of the things to go when Keith went downhill. The line is so automatic in fic - "Backup whined to be let out" - and I wanted something different. Something that was so NOT Keith Mars. And I'm glad you like the K/V scenes, b/c they're some of my favorites so far.
Hope you're well; thank you for all the wonderful feedback. I'm working towards the next part, I promise. I go back to school in nine days, but hopefully we'll come up with a balance of school/writing to at least get through this WIP.
Reply
"You will see them back at the Grand! In a few chapters. *smiles evilly*"
WAIT! I should have qualified that-- I want to see them at the Grand HAPPY! Happy, I say! NOT dark and twisty! Damn, why do I feel as if I'm too late...
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment