Multitasking Update
So, I think I've made this complaint before, but why is it that when school ends, I get busier instead of having more time?
I think it has something to do with the fact I'm now working full-time, which is more hours than school was. Also all the things I've been putting off now need to be dealt with.
So my LJ presence has been non-existent. I apologize. I've been reading a bit, and enjoying my f-list as usual. I'm also hunting for a horse to show, as I don't have one at the moment and it's depressing me. I tried to talk to my mom about maybe spending a little more on one for myself instead of working with other people's, not buying but maybe bringing a young project to a local stable for me to work with exclusively and show over the summer. She flipped out, because she thinks it's too expensive and I should be saving money for law school and if I dare even think about making horses a more serious part of my life she's kicking me out, because it's not good enough for a career and it will only ever be a "hobby" for me. I feel like asking her, what if I don't care about the same things you do? What if I'd be happy without a big house or expensive car or fancy furniture? What if horses are all I need to be happy? Don't I get to be happy?
I can't do that, though. Since my dad died, I feel like she and my siblings are relying on me. I have to be the safety net, y'know? I want to be able to take care of her. It's hard, though, when everyone around me is importing horses from Europe and going to Lexington for Young Riders and I'm there with them, in terms of skill level, but I don't have a hundred thousand dollar horse or even any horse I get to work with on a consistent basis, and I can't afford to haul out to the training barns for lessons with the Olympians. So I get left behind and I feel like I'm wasting my only chance for something I really want.
Sorry for the emo. I'm not really unhappy with my life - in fact, overall, I am happy on a daily basis, and I know I'm lucky, and I appreciate all I have, but I guess I'm a greedy little brat and I can't help wanting more.
Finally, I have a rec for you. Harry Potter, of all fandoms. I love Gravidy's God of the Lost, because I'm a Draco/Hermione shipper and I love its nasty, sharp characterizaton and the creepy loops it throws you, but I'm actually here to pimp her new piece, which has something for everyone - het, slash, or threesomes - and the best Draco I've ever seen. It's canon Draco in all his snivelling, cowardly nastiness, and you feel the same revulsion for him that you do in the books, and yet by the end you're somehow rooting for him. It's not Slytherin-apologist, not really, yet it treats them as people, and I love that so much I made it the subject of my final essay in Children's Lit. The prof really liked it, by the way :) So without further ado, a must-read for all HP fans: Afterimage.
PS Throw some questions my way for that interview meme, wouldja? ;)
I think it has something to do with the fact I'm now working full-time, which is more hours than school was. Also all the things I've been putting off now need to be dealt with.
So my LJ presence has been non-existent. I apologize. I've been reading a bit, and enjoying my f-list as usual. I'm also hunting for a horse to show, as I don't have one at the moment and it's depressing me. I tried to talk to my mom about maybe spending a little more on one for myself instead of working with other people's, not buying but maybe bringing a young project to a local stable for me to work with exclusively and show over the summer. She flipped out, because she thinks it's too expensive and I should be saving money for law school and if I dare even think about making horses a more serious part of my life she's kicking me out, because it's not good enough for a career and it will only ever be a "hobby" for me. I feel like asking her, what if I don't care about the same things you do? What if I'd be happy without a big house or expensive car or fancy furniture? What if horses are all I need to be happy? Don't I get to be happy?
I can't do that, though. Since my dad died, I feel like she and my siblings are relying on me. I have to be the safety net, y'know? I want to be able to take care of her. It's hard, though, when everyone around me is importing horses from Europe and going to Lexington for Young Riders and I'm there with them, in terms of skill level, but I don't have a hundred thousand dollar horse or even any horse I get to work with on a consistent basis, and I can't afford to haul out to the training barns for lessons with the Olympians. So I get left behind and I feel like I'm wasting my only chance for something I really want.
Sorry for the emo. I'm not really unhappy with my life - in fact, overall, I am happy on a daily basis, and I know I'm lucky, and I appreciate all I have, but I guess I'm a greedy little brat and I can't help wanting more.
Finally, I have a rec for you. Harry Potter, of all fandoms. I love Gravidy's God of the Lost, because I'm a Draco/Hermione shipper and I love its nasty, sharp characterizaton and the creepy loops it throws you, but I'm actually here to pimp her new piece, which has something for everyone - het, slash, or threesomes - and the best Draco I've ever seen. It's canon Draco in all his snivelling, cowardly nastiness, and you feel the same revulsion for him that you do in the books, and yet by the end you're somehow rooting for him. It's not Slytherin-apologist, not really, yet it treats them as people, and I love that so much I made it the subject of my final essay in Children's Lit. The prof really liked it, by the way :) So without further ado, a must-read for all HP fans: Afterimage.
PS Throw some questions my way for that interview meme, wouldja? ;)