Summing it up...
Well, I dont excatly know what to say, but I guess the title will be appropriate as this is basically going to be a way to sum up the last year. I think this is something that has needed to be done for a while.
2006, started out on a weird foot. I was back in a place that was incredibly different than the world I was used to. I returned to FPC with the knowledge that I had a great best friend to go back to. Throughout the semester I would deal with numorous situations, gain some great friends - including two who would become my best friends - and try to be more of a normal 19 year old. I ended up dealing with a situation in which i had never been placed, and I admit I didnt nessicarily handle it very well. In the end though we all managed to work through it and regain even footing. When the end of the semester came I left with the knowledge that I had met some amazing people and looked forward to returning in the fall to see where I would go, what opportunites would present themselves. I looked forward to continuing and deeping a great friendship between myself, Meredith Butler, and Caroline Tuttle.
During the summer I had the privledge of getting to live with one of the best friends I had made at FPC, Meredith. This was a huge step for me, getting to be out on my own essentially, away from the family that loved me, but always tried to keep me tied to the apron strings, as the saying goes. So there I was, 2 hours from home, living and working with a friend that had come to mean the world to me. She had in fact become more just a friend - she had become my sister in everything except blood.
Unfortunaly, in life we rarely see the bumps in the road. That summer turned out to be one of the hardest in my life. I ended up dealing with things...one situation in particular that tested me in a way that I had never been tested. I was forced to grow up even more than I already had. To be honest, this situation devistated me. No one should ever have to do what I did that one night in July...but life doesn't nessicarily care what one should or shouldn't have to do. I will leave the details of that situation out, as even now it is too painful to think about. In reality I wish I could forget what happened; somethings however will remain with you your entire life.
At the end of the summer I was left drained, instead of refreshed. I came back to Pierce after a week of being home...and I simply did not care anymore. School in its entirety held little enjoyment for me, little promise of the future. I didn't care whether I succeeded or failed in my courses, a huge first for me. What differance would it make, if things turn out in a way I was sure they would. I would only have to leave Pierce and everything I ever had...so I might as well start now, right.
Luckily however I have some pretty amazing friends. These friends saw that I wasn't nessicarily thinking straight and managed to pull me back into the world of the living..if not always sane. :-D
Through their help, love and encouragement I got my head back where it belonged and made myself start to care again.
It was about this time that I got to know another friend who's life seemed to be spiralling out of control with no way to stop it. I will refrain from details, as they are personal and it is not my place to share them. I will however say that everything that he had ever cared about seemed to be abandoning him, leaving him to fend for himself in a world that had proved all to often that it didnt care.
I, however, being the person that I am, couldnt stop myself from wanting to help. Its just who I am. So I tried, and I waited...and adventually a deeper friendship was formed. I managed to get him to trust me, although it took a great deal of time (later I would realize just how long it really took). So here we were, two lost broken people struggling to make it. Time went on and wounds began to heal.
None of us knew the difficulties that we would have to contend with, the battles we would have to fight in the near future. They say God never gives us more than we can handle. Well at that time he decided to give us numerous problems, with very little time to recover before the next wave of adversity hit.
Fights were fought, things were said, people got hurt, lies were told only to later be admitted to. Some things were easily forgiven, if not forgotten while others are still unsolved.
In the end 2006 was not a good year. However, the memories that were given to me will not be forgotten. Instead most will be cherished, for they were the most touching, heartfelt that I have ever had.
They say hindsight is 20/20 and for the most part they are right. I can look back now, and see with clear vision. And for the first time I can say things that I have always meant to, but could never find the words for. I can tell you all the most important things, the things that should have been said long ago.
Meredith, you are and will always be my best friend. A light in my life, who helped me through what was the most homesick time imaginable. You were there, and continued to be there for me, even when I thought, and expected you to leave. You stuck by me in a way no one ever has. I watched as you grew and bloomed in a place where we are finally ment to explore who we are. You were the constant compainon, always there with a kind word or a shoulder to cry on, even though I didnt accept that shoulder as much I should have. Just knowing that it was there, however, changed me as a person. We have some great memories from our first year, and even better ones from the summer. I will never forget the nights we had, talking, laughing and having the time of our lives. You were there when all seemed lost in my world. I love you and always will. No matter what the future holds, I will always think of you as a sister in my heart, for you were the gateway that lead me to where I am and who I am today.
Caroline, your bright shinning face is never far from my mind when trouble is near. The first memory I have of you is when I met you, playing scabble with Lisa in the Pub. I dont remember what my first thoughts were upon meeting you, but you soon came to mean a lot to me. In a very short amount of time we bacame fast friends and I saw something that constantly drew me to you. Your love for life, and desire to learn makes me realize time and again how lucky I am to have you in my life. We too share many memories, more than we have pictures for, from our spring semester together. During the summer we managed to stay great friends, deeping our friendship with our numerous conversations, in which we were both bored off our asses and could do nothing about it. Our time will together will continue. You know that I love you and you are also a sister to me. we share a great deal of inside jokes, and all i have to do is think of them and smile.
Dave, I thank you for the time we had together as great friends. At one point you were a best friend, and I'm sorry that time had to end as it did. There will always be the good memories that we all have in which you made me smile, or told me that life would get better. No one can erase the things that happened or go back into the past and change what did happen. You and I, will most likely never have what we had, as much as that pains me in a way to say. I fear that time has come to an end, and although a part of me doesnt want to lose that, I fear the things that have been done are to great for me to get over at the moment. We shall see. I do however thank you and appreciate all that we shared and all that you gave me in the time that we had.
Darci, well you were there through it all. Granite hallmates last year, who loved Kelli Costa and learned many things about each other. You have been there when I was down, kicked my butt and said so what. If im feeling down all I have to do is look at my Darci-kins to make a face..and there is the sun! Good memories here, a lot from this year. I look forward to you coming into my room anytime of the day to see what im doing...we both get bored easily in that suite, yet neither wants to go far. And the P-bitching was so much fun :-D. You are a more recent member of the group but have found a place in my heart that is justified. I am sorry you arent coming to Ireland this summer (I know your gonna kill me now for reminding you, but I have to say it so you know what it means), because I know without a doubt that we would have had the time of our lives....i dont think it will be nearly as fun without you :'(. I love you and always will, no matter where life takes us.
Michele...oh what can I say. Our friendship is new, yet has the stuff to last. What I see in you ..well its almost like looking in a mirror. I know that no matter what we will be there to kick each other in the butt and tell the other the truth....which most usually happens to be the opposite of what the other wants to hear..and that just sucks! We can always deny it, but in the end we both know what the other says is true. In the short time we have had together, you have become very dear to my heart. I will never forget the memories we have already made and the ones that we'll make in the coming months. I love you.
The last person...and god, he is anything but the last person to me. Jon (yeah and I had to retype it cuz the O got big again!) there is so much to say, and not enough words. This is the first time I am usuing your name. What we have shared...has been enough to change my life. Many people would think you were a simple guy, most call you Gucc. To me you will never be just a simple guy. From when we first started hanging out and there was all that pain in your eyes, until today, there has always been more. You were there through the tough times, and I was there to try to help you. There will never be a time when I don't think of you and have a memory or a quote come to mind. You were there for me in a way that no one ever has been...in a way I have never let anyone be. I will always care and I will always be there if you ever need me. During the semester we got close; during the break we have talked almost daily. What the future holds is unknown to us. There are so many things...so many thoughts. You are like a lighthouse, a beacon in the storm drawing me safetly to shore...a constant light in my life. Neither one of us know where we will go from here, or how things will work out. You know my side, you know...well you know. All things aside I want you to know that in the time we had, you came to mean a great deal. I will always appreciate what you did for me, what you are still doing whether you realize it or not. There is still so much to be said, but I can't find the words, I cant find the right ones to tell you...
No one knows what tomorrow holds, for any of us. There are still things left unsaid, feelings left to be shared...and great memories still to be made. So here is to 2007, may it be better and not worse, may we make many memories, laugh often, live as much as we can, and cherish the ones we love.
2006, started out on a weird foot. I was back in a place that was incredibly different than the world I was used to. I returned to FPC with the knowledge that I had a great best friend to go back to. Throughout the semester I would deal with numorous situations, gain some great friends - including two who would become my best friends - and try to be more of a normal 19 year old. I ended up dealing with a situation in which i had never been placed, and I admit I didnt nessicarily handle it very well. In the end though we all managed to work through it and regain even footing. When the end of the semester came I left with the knowledge that I had met some amazing people and looked forward to returning in the fall to see where I would go, what opportunites would present themselves. I looked forward to continuing and deeping a great friendship between myself, Meredith Butler, and Caroline Tuttle.
During the summer I had the privledge of getting to live with one of the best friends I had made at FPC, Meredith. This was a huge step for me, getting to be out on my own essentially, away from the family that loved me, but always tried to keep me tied to the apron strings, as the saying goes. So there I was, 2 hours from home, living and working with a friend that had come to mean the world to me. She had in fact become more just a friend - she had become my sister in everything except blood.
Unfortunaly, in life we rarely see the bumps in the road. That summer turned out to be one of the hardest in my life. I ended up dealing with things...one situation in particular that tested me in a way that I had never been tested. I was forced to grow up even more than I already had. To be honest, this situation devistated me. No one should ever have to do what I did that one night in July...but life doesn't nessicarily care what one should or shouldn't have to do. I will leave the details of that situation out, as even now it is too painful to think about. In reality I wish I could forget what happened; somethings however will remain with you your entire life.
At the end of the summer I was left drained, instead of refreshed. I came back to Pierce after a week of being home...and I simply did not care anymore. School in its entirety held little enjoyment for me, little promise of the future. I didn't care whether I succeeded or failed in my courses, a huge first for me. What differance would it make, if things turn out in a way I was sure they would. I would only have to leave Pierce and everything I ever had...so I might as well start now, right.
Luckily however I have some pretty amazing friends. These friends saw that I wasn't nessicarily thinking straight and managed to pull me back into the world of the living..if not always sane. :-D
Through their help, love and encouragement I got my head back where it belonged and made myself start to care again.
It was about this time that I got to know another friend who's life seemed to be spiralling out of control with no way to stop it. I will refrain from details, as they are personal and it is not my place to share them. I will however say that everything that he had ever cared about seemed to be abandoning him, leaving him to fend for himself in a world that had proved all to often that it didnt care.
I, however, being the person that I am, couldnt stop myself from wanting to help. Its just who I am. So I tried, and I waited...and adventually a deeper friendship was formed. I managed to get him to trust me, although it took a great deal of time (later I would realize just how long it really took). So here we were, two lost broken people struggling to make it. Time went on and wounds began to heal.
None of us knew the difficulties that we would have to contend with, the battles we would have to fight in the near future. They say God never gives us more than we can handle. Well at that time he decided to give us numerous problems, with very little time to recover before the next wave of adversity hit.
Fights were fought, things were said, people got hurt, lies were told only to later be admitted to. Some things were easily forgiven, if not forgotten while others are still unsolved.
In the end 2006 was not a good year. However, the memories that were given to me will not be forgotten. Instead most will be cherished, for they were the most touching, heartfelt that I have ever had.
They say hindsight is 20/20 and for the most part they are right. I can look back now, and see with clear vision. And for the first time I can say things that I have always meant to, but could never find the words for. I can tell you all the most important things, the things that should have been said long ago.
Meredith, you are and will always be my best friend. A light in my life, who helped me through what was the most homesick time imaginable. You were there, and continued to be there for me, even when I thought, and expected you to leave. You stuck by me in a way no one ever has. I watched as you grew and bloomed in a place where we are finally ment to explore who we are. You were the constant compainon, always there with a kind word or a shoulder to cry on, even though I didnt accept that shoulder as much I should have. Just knowing that it was there, however, changed me as a person. We have some great memories from our first year, and even better ones from the summer. I will never forget the nights we had, talking, laughing and having the time of our lives. You were there when all seemed lost in my world. I love you and always will. No matter what the future holds, I will always think of you as a sister in my heart, for you were the gateway that lead me to where I am and who I am today.
Caroline, your bright shinning face is never far from my mind when trouble is near. The first memory I have of you is when I met you, playing scabble with Lisa in the Pub. I dont remember what my first thoughts were upon meeting you, but you soon came to mean a lot to me. In a very short amount of time we bacame fast friends and I saw something that constantly drew me to you. Your love for life, and desire to learn makes me realize time and again how lucky I am to have you in my life. We too share many memories, more than we have pictures for, from our spring semester together. During the summer we managed to stay great friends, deeping our friendship with our numerous conversations, in which we were both bored off our asses and could do nothing about it. Our time will together will continue. You know that I love you and you are also a sister to me. we share a great deal of inside jokes, and all i have to do is think of them and smile.
Dave, I thank you for the time we had together as great friends. At one point you were a best friend, and I'm sorry that time had to end as it did. There will always be the good memories that we all have in which you made me smile, or told me that life would get better. No one can erase the things that happened or go back into the past and change what did happen. You and I, will most likely never have what we had, as much as that pains me in a way to say. I fear that time has come to an end, and although a part of me doesnt want to lose that, I fear the things that have been done are to great for me to get over at the moment. We shall see. I do however thank you and appreciate all that we shared and all that you gave me in the time that we had.
Darci, well you were there through it all. Granite hallmates last year, who loved Kelli Costa and learned many things about each other. You have been there when I was down, kicked my butt and said so what. If im feeling down all I have to do is look at my Darci-kins to make a face..and there is the sun! Good memories here, a lot from this year. I look forward to you coming into my room anytime of the day to see what im doing...we both get bored easily in that suite, yet neither wants to go far. And the P-bitching was so much fun :-D. You are a more recent member of the group but have found a place in my heart that is justified. I am sorry you arent coming to Ireland this summer (I know your gonna kill me now for reminding you, but I have to say it so you know what it means), because I know without a doubt that we would have had the time of our lives....i dont think it will be nearly as fun without you :'(. I love you and always will, no matter where life takes us.
Michele...oh what can I say. Our friendship is new, yet has the stuff to last. What I see in you ..well its almost like looking in a mirror. I know that no matter what we will be there to kick each other in the butt and tell the other the truth....which most usually happens to be the opposite of what the other wants to hear..and that just sucks! We can always deny it, but in the end we both know what the other says is true. In the short time we have had together, you have become very dear to my heart. I will never forget the memories we have already made and the ones that we'll make in the coming months. I love you.
The last person...and god, he is anything but the last person to me. Jon (yeah and I had to retype it cuz the O got big again!) there is so much to say, and not enough words. This is the first time I am usuing your name. What we have shared...has been enough to change my life. Many people would think you were a simple guy, most call you Gucc. To me you will never be just a simple guy. From when we first started hanging out and there was all that pain in your eyes, until today, there has always been more. You were there through the tough times, and I was there to try to help you. There will never be a time when I don't think of you and have a memory or a quote come to mind. You were there for me in a way that no one ever has been...in a way I have never let anyone be. I will always care and I will always be there if you ever need me. During the semester we got close; during the break we have talked almost daily. What the future holds is unknown to us. There are so many things...so many thoughts. You are like a lighthouse, a beacon in the storm drawing me safetly to shore...a constant light in my life. Neither one of us know where we will go from here, or how things will work out. You know my side, you know...well you know. All things aside I want you to know that in the time we had, you came to mean a great deal. I will always appreciate what you did for me, what you are still doing whether you realize it or not. There is still so much to be said, but I can't find the words, I cant find the right ones to tell you...
No one knows what tomorrow holds, for any of us. There are still things left unsaid, feelings left to be shared...and great memories still to be made. So here is to 2007, may it be better and not worse, may we make many memories, laugh often, live as much as we can, and cherish the ones we love.