yeah....
so i'm totally torn up inside.
i can't discern between what my heart wants and what my mind wants. i can't tell anymore. going back to oberlin will be a good thing. i need a break from USC. i don't want to say that lately i've been really hurt within myself, but i feel like i'm having too many internal battles that have to do with being here.
i just need a vacation from all the people i met. i love you all from the bottom of my heart....and the relationships i've developed are unbelievable. but i need time away to figure out what i should do about situations with people. i feel like a bad person sometimes. i hide my feelings, knowing damn well i should just say it, but saying something would ruin what i have with said people. and it hurts. i want friendships, and i also want more than that. and my heart tells me to find a relationship inside that i am really close with. being away will help me figure that out. cuz right now it's not just one person, and that bothers me. i need to make up my mind.
i can't discern between what my heart wants and what my mind wants. i can't tell anymore. going back to oberlin will be a good thing. i need a break from USC. i don't want to say that lately i've been really hurt within myself, but i feel like i'm having too many internal battles that have to do with being here.
i just need a vacation from all the people i met. i love you all from the bottom of my heart....and the relationships i've developed are unbelievable. but i need time away to figure out what i should do about situations with people. i feel like a bad person sometimes. i hide my feelings, knowing damn well i should just say it, but saying something would ruin what i have with said people. and it hurts. i want friendships, and i also want more than that. and my heart tells me to find a relationship inside that i am really close with. being away will help me figure that out. cuz right now it's not just one person, and that bothers me. i need to make up my mind.