[Private to Al, Sakura, Mitani, Rangiku, Sophie, Howl]
I have heard..he's gone.
It's good, I don't want him around, but somehow unsatisfying.
I'm relieved. I'm angry. I want to make him suffer. I never want to see him again.
I don't know what I want or what to think.
Just when I thought I'd sorted it out, that bastard left.
I thought I'd figured out what I'd do but he's gone and now I don't have to...
I think I am relieved most of all.
I still don't understand everything. I don't understand his motives. I don't understand why me. I don't understand how I feel about it. I still hate myself for being so fucking stupid. I hate myself for opening my mouth and getting people's pity. God, I hate being pitied. Or maybe...I hate being pitiful.
Look at this, I'm rambling. I hate fucking rambling. I hate this!
[There is spilled ink at the bottom of the page, as though his quill had broken in an angry fit, blurred over some of what he said but one word stands out; obliviated.]
It's good, I don't want him around, but somehow unsatisfying.
I'm relieved. I'm angry. I want to make him suffer. I never want to see him again.
I don't know what I want or what to think.
Just when I thought I'd sorted it out, that bastard left.
I thought I'd figured out what I'd do but he's gone and now I don't have to...
I think I am relieved most of all.
I still don't understand everything. I don't understand his motives. I don't understand why me. I don't understand how I feel about it. I still hate myself for being so fucking stupid. I hate myself for opening my mouth and getting people's pity. God, I hate being pitied. Or maybe...I hate being pitiful.
Look at this, I'm rambling. I hate fucking rambling. I hate this!
[There is spilled ink at the bottom of the page, as though his quill had broken in an angry fit, blurred over some of what he said but one word stands out; obliviated.]