Hand in Hand; Part 10
Wow... this chapter took me a grand total of five days to write. A new record!!! ^w^ I feel so proud of myself! Well, anyways. I'm going on vacation tomorrow, so I wanted to get chapter 10 out so I could write chapter 11 while I'm in Lake Tahoe (on the nights when the parents go to the casinos xD ) I'm so glad I finished this in time, I was a little worried at first, but then it all just spilled out. I'm so excited about these next few chapters! They're what inspired my story to begin with! So, please enjoy chapter 10!
Title: Hand in Hand
Written by armor_of_guilt
Genre: Many things. Angst, fluff, and romancey (I keep forgetting to put the romance part in... oh well)
Pairings: Elricest
Warnings: Spoilers up to episode 51; AU; language; blood; giant red, rubber balls
Rating: PG-13 for now.
Story: Ongoing
[..X..]
[Distance makes the heart grow fonder]
I didn’t sleep.
How could I have slept? That information… It was just… I wasn’t expecting to find anything like that… Not from him. Not from my big brother.
All night, I just sat at his desk and read every single word on all those papers over and over… Each word was drilled into my head and memory. I could probably recite each note by heart now, not that I wanted to. The words were too sad. I couldn’t help the tears that now stained and smeared almost every line, even if they were all smeared from his hasty writing to begin with. I was torn between feeling ecstatic that my feelings were returned or sympathetic and distressed from the terrible things Ed wrote about himself. He’s not a bad big brother… he’s not dirty and filthy… he’s perfectly wonderful… These thoughts raced through my head and I just wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him that everything was okay and that he deserved me and we could be happy together. Just the two of us.
I’m such a hypocrite…
I sniffled, rocking back and forth in the chair that sat before Ed’s desk; all the tear-stained pages were turning pink and yellow from the rising sun. I feel exactly like he does, yet I’m saying it’s okay for him to feel like that… but it’s not for me… My note will probably make everything worse. He’ll feel guilty and maybe depressed, too. And I won’t be able to make him feel better because I’m not there.
I curled into myself further, my cheeks were all stiff and had trails of moisture painted on them. The house was silent, except for the clock ticking, and a shiver ran down my spine. How am I going to bring this up? “Oh, Brother, I knew you told me not to mess with your desk, but I did anyway and I just wanted to say that I love you too.” I snorted at the thought of doing that. It would get one hell of a reaction out of Ed, that’s for sure.
“I don’t deserve him… He’s too good for me…”
I sighed, absently fingering the slip of paper that might or might not have had that line written on it. It was all so complicated. If we both weren’t so fearful of what the other would think, then we wouldn’t be in this mess. Ed may not even have had to go so far away. I drew my hand back so I could hug my knees closer. I really missed him. Not even a day had passed and already the house felt empty and cold while I felt miserable and lonely. And nervous. The happy butterflies left when I had nothing to do but reflect on my brother’s self abuse. His self hatred. I couldn’t help but find it ironic that those words he used on himself would be applied to me as well. If he knew, of course.
But he doesn’t… because I was too much of a coward to tell him how I felt, even when he asked me all those times. How did he hide it so well? Wouldn’t he feel awkward when I pressed close to him or hugged him or kissed him on the cheek? Brother isn’t exactly the best at concealing his emotions, and he’s very vocal about stuff too. What makes this so different?
I must’ve dosed off in my train of thought because suddenly I heard the clock chime ten. Maybe I’m just oblivious.
__________________________________________
The phone rang twice before someone picked it up. It was that secretary lady, she had to patch the line into Mustang’s office again when I gave her the code. I asked specifically for “Brigadier General Mustang” so that I could speak directly to him and not deal with anything else at the moment.
“Hello?”
I stiffened at his laidback tone, almost as if he were bored. “Hello, General. It’s Alphonse.”
There was silence on the other line, papers rustling and a few coughs in background from his subordinates; then he spoke with a more serious tone, “What do you need, Al?”
“What do I need?” my fist clenched at the hints of degradation in his voice, almost like when he was telling Ed his place, “I need to know where my brother is and why he hasn’t called.”
“Al, it’s ten thirty in the morning. I don’t think he can call you from a train. Remember, he left late yesterday afternoon. He’s still on the train most likely. You probably won’t get a call from him for at least another day or two.” he told me, as if I should’ve already known this.
My head was pounding from a lack of sleep, “Another day? But I can’t wait that long…”
“You’ll be waiting longer than that most of the time. He shouldn’t even have permission to call anyone other than me, I’m making this an exception.” Mustang sounded irritated. “Who knows if he’ll even get the time to call you. It’s an assignment, not a vacation.”
I frowned in concentration, we never had to think about this before since we just had ourselves to talk to. We never had to call anyone other than the military when we were on actual assignments. Ed didn’t really like how the phone system was set up anyway. What if he doesn’t call me? At all. Who knows how long this will take… and if I don’t get a word from him…
Mustang could sense my change in mood, I think, he sounded more tolerant and sympathetic when he next spoke, “I’m sure it’s very hard for you to be without him, but you’ll have to try and deal with it. Alright?”
“Okay.” I nodded, my previous anger directed at him gone and replaced with some semblance of respect. Some. “Do you know when his train will get in?”
“I don’t. But tell you what, as soon as I hear anything from anyone in Ed’s party, I’ll let you know. Okay?”
I smiled sadly, but very grateful for any kind of help, “Thank you, General. Goodbye.”
“Goodbye.”
I placed the phone back in it’s cradle and ran a hand through my steadily growing hair. It was getting a little longer, I’d have to cut it soon. Or maybe I’d just grow it out like Ed’s. The nostalgic smile revived itself when I imagined us both with long hair, but somehow it seemed strange for me to have it, so I instead just pictured Ed. His long, golden hair braided neatly with haphazard bangs hanging in his face. Said face was still slightly rounded from childhood, but still angled with maturity and fast approaching adulthood. He’d always wear that silly grin, though. And his eyes would glimmer when he was really happy and excited and his cheeks would puff out when he pouted like a child, too.
“Enough…” I mumbled to myself, shaking my head so that I was brought back to reality where it was just me and the quiet, “I should do something useful while I’m just standing here.”
I decided to go and dust some shelves and photographs we had framed. There weren’t many; two were from my birthday party in Resembool about a month ago, one was of Ed and I in those rental suits we’d worn for the promotion ceremony, another was of Ed and I when we were younger and fishing somewhere, and then we had a picture of mom and the two of us that Winry had saved. Not a vast collection, but Ed had never really found a use for pictures. I was the one who insisted on framing some and setting them up on end tables and counters. I liked having the memories in a tangible form.
There were two pictures in the main room; one on the bookshelf and the other by the phone. I quickly skimmed over each area with the feather duster, then went back to do a more thorough job when I remembered I had plenty of time. I dusted each book binding and shelf; even the sides of the bookshelf were cleared. The little end table and phone were also taken care of. After dusting in there, I went into our bedroom where the remaining photographs were.
I had positioned the three on the nightstand between the two beds, so that they could be admired by both of us. But Ed didn’t look at them as often as I did. I blinked at the end table once I reached it. Something was missing. Instead of three photographs, there were only two. Pivoting around so that I could search the room, I was immediately distressed when I saw that it wasn’t here. I looked through the entire house, even under the couch and behind the fridge, but it wasn’t there.
“That one was my favorite…” I mused quietly, trying to come up with some explanation for why the picture of Ed and I on my birthday could be missing. “Where could it have gone?”
The first thing that came to mind was that Ed might’ve knocked it over when he was rampaging the other day, when he thought I wouldn’t come home, but that was checked off because I clearly remembered seeing it there when we were eating dinner before he had to pack. So it had gone missing sometime between yesterday morning and this morning.
“Maybe Brother took it?” The idea was possible; he might’ve wanted something to look at while he was bored in Lior or if he missed me. “But wouldn’t he have told me?” He was probably too embarrassed to say anything or too stubborn to admit that pictures were useful. “I guess I’ll ask him when he calls… along with everything else I have to ask him…”
When are you coming home? Are you eating okay? Do you love me? Did you take the picture with you? Will you be able to call me every day, twice a day like you promised? Do you really love me? Did you get my note? Do you love me more than a brother?
So many questions… they’d overwhelm him. I should stick to asking him a few at a time, so he doesn’t get flustered or concerned over the phone. I don’t want him to think that I’ve got nothing better to do than think of all these questions that I want to ask him, even if it is true.
I had successfully wasted an hour of my time by dusting and searching for the picture. Now that I knew that Ed loved me too, I saw no point in continuing to read those books I had borrowed. I can return the books to Sheska and maybe visit with her a little. Borrow some new books too. Then I could go for a walk and be able to take my mind off things.
“They believe that the rebellion is sending in terrorists to attack Central and destroy the military by creating distractions such as this one.”
I frowned, remembering Ed telling me about possible terrorists. I guess it wouldn’t be too smart for me to wander around Central all alone, especially if people could recognize me as the Fullmetal Alchemist’s younger brother. I highly doubted that though. Only Winry and Aunt Pinako and some choice people in the military knew what I really looked like. Everyone else thought I should be around seven feet tall and decked out in a suit of armor.
I flopped down onto the couch, rubbing my eyes sleepily. A few hours of dozing wasn’t going to cover a whole night of sleeplessness. Without anything else for me to do at the moment, I let myself drift off for a nap.
__________________________________________
A shrill ring roused me from sleep some time later. I whimpered in slight protest and rubbed my eyes to clear any traces of sleep from them. I yawned softly, covering my mouth politely, then looked around to see what it was that woke me up. The phone was sitting in it’s cradle and ringing loudly, whoever was calling was apparently determined to get through.
I blinked at it for a second, then flopped back down onto the couch with a groan, “Brother… get the phone!”
When I didn’t get a reply, I sat back up and pouted. My mind was still hazy from sleeping, so I wasn’t exactly in the mood to be answering a phone. I called for my brother a few more times, then gave up and assumed he was sleeping as well. Getting to my feet, I padded over to the table where the phone sat. The photograph that accompanied it smiled at me, then realization hit me.
“Oh yeah… Brother’s not home…” I mumbled, more awake and alert, “That means…” I gasped suddenly and grabbed the phone quickly before whoever it was could hang up. Oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please be Brother!! “Hello?”
“Finally!! I was wondering when you’d pick up!”
My heart fluttered happily and nervously at the familiar voice, “Brother!”
“Who else would it be, Al?” he was trying to tease me, but he sounded too happy to hear me for it to have much effect, “What took you so long to get to the phone?”
I smiled sheepishly, even though he couldn’t see it, “Oh, I was sleeping. Sorry.”
“You were sleeping? At five in the afternoon?” he asked me in a disbelieving tone.
I blinked at the clock that hung on the wall, “Wow… I didn’t know I slept that late. I took a nap around noon because I was a little tired.” he made some kind of affirmation noise, so I took it as a signal to continue talking, “How was your trip down there?”
He sighed, “Really long and boring… Almost three days too! I can’t believe how long it took. And there were no interesting people there with me! Except Havoc, he’s here too, so at least I have someone to talk to. But apparently, there’s another Colonel here. He’s not from Mustang’s jurisdiction, but the higher ups thought Mustang might need some back up. Stupid assholes…” he muttered some other stuff, making me grin in spite of myself, “Well, anyways, he’s here and he’s a real tight ass. He reminds me of Mustang, only not lazy. Or as lenient. Actually… his arrogance is the only thing that reminds me of Mustang. The cocky bastard… So, he a Colonel also and he’s acting like he runs the place and won’t let me have a say in any of it! He even made this stupid rule for me, I can’t talk on the phone everyday. Hell! He won’t even let me call once a week, Al! He said ‘On occasion’ in that stuffy, stupid voice of his. Damn, I hate him!”
“What?” I felt my giddy mood falter with that news, “You can’t call?”
Ed seemed to have settled down a little, “I’m sorry, Al. But he really wants us all to be focused on our work and he thinks that me talking with you will distract me. He’s completely ignoring that we’re the same rank. It’s not fair.”
I could imagine my older brother pouting and folding his arms across his chest for emphasis. “I’m sorry, too, Brother. That doesn’t sound fair at all. Maybe you could ask the General-”
“No way am I asking that bastard for anything. He’s already done enough by sending me here.” he groaned, I could almost see him rubbing at his temple in annoyance, “You wouldn’t like it here, Al… it’s barren and the only thing you can see for miles are the scattered tents of some citizens of Lior and the construction site of the new city. Other than that it’s just desert and military. And it’s so damn hot here!”
It was almost summer, so it wasn’t the best time for them to be out in the desert. “I’m really sorry, Brother. I hope you’ll be able to come home soon and get away from all that.”
“Yeah… I’ve been here a grand total of one day and I already feel nauseous thinking of this place.” he mumbled.
I blinked, “Wait… you said that the train ride was almost three days, so how could you have be there for one day already?” That didn’t make any sense. He left yesterday… So how could…?
“Al, I left four days ago. Remember? The damn bastard wouldn’t let me call you until now.”
“Four days ago?” I didn’t have to calculate this to know what had happened, I had slept for three days! That wasn’t good… I haven’t slept that long since back when I was getting used to my body.
“Al? You still with me?” Ed was asking me, “How long did you sleep? That nap must’ve eaten away at some of your brain.”
I laughed nervously, “Well… I guess it wasn’t really a nap… I slept for three days. Heh, funny isn’t it, Brother?”
“What?” he sounded very confused, “How can you sleep for three days straight!? You have got to be kidding me, Al! Don’t you have stuff to do? Didn’t you eat?!”
I winced, “Ah, so that’s why I’m so hungry…” Ed was not happy. “I’m sorry, I guess I just had nothing to do so I slept. And slept… and I still have nothing to do. It’s weird.”
“There’s nothing for you to do at all?”
“Well… I get sidetracked and start worrying about you.” I told him tentatively, “I can’t concentrate on anything and then it gets… kind of lonely…”
Ed didn’t say anything for a minute, I was worried we might’ve got disconnected, “Brother?”
“Hey, Al? I know I’m going to regret this later… but I don’t want to be lonely and just sleep while I’m gone. That’s not healthy. So… why don’t you get yourself some company? You… you’ve always wanted a cat… right?”
I gasped, “Really?! Really, you mean it, Brother?! I can get a cat?!”
“Yeah, yeah. You can.” He half chuckled, half sighed. “As long as you take care of it and keep it away from me when I get back.”
I was almost bursting from excitement, “Oh yes! I will, Brother! I promise! You’re the best big brother ever!” I was just about to make a mental list of what I’d need for the kitty and what kind of kitty I’d get, when I remembered what I had wanted to ask him. “Hey, Brother?”
“Yeah, Al?” Ed still sounded so happy, even if he was trying to hide it. I felt guilty for having to spoil the moment by asking this, but I had to know.
I took a deep breath, then asked, “Do you love me?”
“No, Al. I just said you could get a kitten and spent four years trying to get your body back so we could live a comfortable life together. Of course I love you, you dope!” he was laughing. It wasn’t funny. It wasn’t his normal laugh, this was forced.
“Brother… you know I love you, right?” I tried a different approach.
“Are you talking about that note, Al? The one you put in my book?” he inquired curiously, “Because I know, you tell me almost every chance you get. Why? Is something wrong?”
“I just want you to know… and you can tell me anything, Brother. I’d never judge you. I’d never cast you away or hate you. I could never. I just want you to know that, okay? Just in case there’s ever something you want to tell me.”
That got him. My brother’s end of the phone was strangely quiet. He was probably suspicious now, and paranoid. I waited patiently for him to say something.
“Okay, Al.” was the final product of his thoughts, “I’ll keep that in mind. Oh, that damn bastard’s kicking me off. I have to go now, Al. Sorry-!”
“Wait, Brother! One more question!” I called to him before he could hang up.
“What?” he sounded nervous, scared almost.
I sighed, “Do you know what happened to the picture of me and you that used to be on our nightstand in our room? You know, from my birthday party?”
“Oh, yeah, that.” he sounded like he was rushing. Maybe he really did have to get off, “I borrowed it. A little memento thing. Is that all you need?”
I nodded sadly, “Yeah that’s all. Thank you, Brother. Be safe and call soon.”
“Yeah, I will.”
“I love you.”
“I do too, you sap. Don’t sleep for another three days! Callyousoonbye!” his fast, jumbled words were the last things ringing in my ears before the line went dead.
“Bye, Brother…”
That had been all the proof I needed. He really was flustered when it came to love, he really did think I meant it in a platonic way and he must’ve been right in those notes, otherwise he wouldn’t have avoided saying it back to me. I gently placed the phone back on the cradle once the dial tone got too sad for me to hear. The house was suddenly very empty again and I silently willed the phone to ring again and have Ed be on the other line so he could apologize and say that he loved me too. Even though I know he does, it still means a lot for me to hear it.
The phone didn’t ring again.
__________________________________________
I ignored my brother’s request and slept on the couch for another whole day before deciding enough was enough. I wanted that kitty.
I waited until Ed had been gone for a whole week before going out in search of a kitty friend. I wanted to make the house cat-safe and also set up a little place for it to eat in the kitchen and sleep and do it’s business. I used alchemy to make the litter box lined with newspaper, kitty bed, and food dishes by altering regular cardboard boxes and extra dishes we didn’t need. The toys I managed to make by getting old newspaper and odds and ends found around the house. I wanted to save as much of Ed’s money as possible, plus I hadn’t used alchemy in a while. It was nice and nostalgic to sit there on the kitchen floor and draw the little circle with chalk and watch the objects alter before my eyes.
So, I had successfully made the items a kitty needed to be happy. Now all I needed was the kitten and some cat food, kitty litter, and maybe a brush. The pound was where I was going first. I wanted to rescue a cat, so what better place than the pound? Then I’d stop by the store and pick up the cat food. Then I’d be all set!
I was so excited. Almost as excited as when Ed first took me around Central in my new body. The excitement had given me something to focus on, instead of Ed being gone and out in the open where he could get hurt… I shivered involuntarily and chased the thought away. He’d be fine. He said so. Focus on the cat. I told myself, not wanting to get upset over Ed being gone again.
What happened next must have been fate. One second, I was walking along and the next, a large, red rubber ball narrowly misses me. What the heck? It bounced into the alley next to me and I looked over in the direction the ball came from and saw a small group of children across the street. They all looked a little apprehensive about crossing the street, so they all looked to me.
“Hey, mister!” the youngest, a little girl, called out to me, “Can you get our ball, please?”
I smiled despite myself, I looked older compared to those kids. To them, I was the adult. I nodded happily, “Sure.” I didn’t mind helping those kids out. Carefully stepping into the alley, I easily picked out the red rubber ball amidst all the junk. Once I had it securely in my hands, I paused when I heard a soft scratching noise and a tiny cry. Feeling curiosity get the better of me, and definitely recognizing that kind of cry, I peered around the piles of junk and spotted something small and furry.
I ran out of the alley and tossed the kids their ball, before going back into the alley to rescue what I had stumbled upon. A kitten. I scooped up the little thing into my hands easily, it’s pathetic cries for either food or warmth tugged at my heartstrings. Carrying it out into the light, I gasped when I saw how sad it was. The kitten was so small and scrawny, it’s ribs were sticking out and it’s fur was all matted and filthy. I couldn’t even tell what shade of fur it had. Not that it mattered, I fell in love with the kitten as soon as it nuzzled my hand with it’s soft, but tangled, head.
I carried the kitten in my hands gently, I didn’t have any time for the store now. I needed to get the kitten home so I could warm them and wash them and probably get away with feeding them some chicken. I hadn’t gotten very far in my walk, so I was home fairly quickly with my new pet and immediately got to bathing them in the bathroom sink.
During the kitten’s bath, I discovered that she was a girl. I was able to shift my fingers through her fur easily, getting rid of the little tangles with Ed’s comb. I used basic hand soap as a shampoo, since I had nothing else on hand. Once she was all clean and dry, she looked a little healthier, though she was still meowing pitifully. I was actually surprised that she didn’t fight me, then I noticed her injured paw. I wrapped it up as best as I could, then I wrapped her up in a fluffy hand towel that I warmed with the hairdryer.
She was a beautiful little thing from what I could see so far. Her coat was still a little coarse because of her health, but I was sure it would soften up soon. Now that she was all clean, I could tell that she was an interesting mixture of colors. Her head and back were a tawny-orange color, like amber. Her stomach and legs were a paler color, less orange and more beige. Her face and one paw though, were a snowy white and she had large, dark blue eyes that were so innocent looking. I fell in love with her all over again.
“You’re so cute!” I cooed gently, stroking her small head before setting her down in the kitchen so I could get her some food. “Let’s see… here’s some chicken…”
I took some of the leftover chicken I had used for dinner the other day and tore it into tiny, edible shreds for her to eat. I placed them in her bowl and then got some milk for her too. I knew that milk wasn’t always the best thing for cats to have, but she was still a little baby and needed some extra fattening. She was so scrawny, I figured she was the runt and had been abandoned by the rest of the litter.
“Poor, little kitty.” I sat cross-legged on the floor and watched her devour the chicken scraps hungrily. “Well, don’t you worry. Now you have a home here with me and Brother. We’ll take good care of you. Hmm, but you’re going to need a name.”
I sat there for a while, unable to decide on a name for my new kitten. It had to be just right. Something that suited her; both physically and personality-wise. “I’ll just have to wait for the right name to come to me… won’t I, kitty?”
The little bundle of fur yawned with a small squeak, then curled up in the towels for a nap. She had eaten all the chicken I gave her and drank all the milk, too. I smiled and just watched her sleep for a few minutes before getting up to clean her bowls.
__________________________________________
Puff.
Well, her full name was Creampuff, but Puff just seemed to stick with my cute, fluffy ball of fur. In the past three days of me owning her, she had made a pretty good recovery. Her fur had fluffed out and was nice and soft and very puffy; hence her name. I loved to stroke her, because then I could feel her chest rumble as she purred. She wasn’t a very old kitten; I took her to the vet the day after I found her to check for anything that could be wrong and he said that she couldn’t be more than nine weeks old and was very sickly. I knew that kittens were supposed to leave their mothers at around eight weeks or so, but usually to an owner. I didn’t think it was good for a young kitten, or any cat actually, to be out and abandoned.
Other than the fact that she needed lots of food, Puff was free from any disease. I was very happy to tell Ed this when called.
“And her meow is so sweet!” I was babbling into the phone happily, so thankful for having my new friend and my brother to talk to too. “I can’t wait for you to see her, Brother! I know you’ll like her!”
Actually, that was just a hope of mine. I wasn’t too sure if Ed would like having her curious nature around. She was continuously getting into mischief; climbing on top of the book case, chewing on the phone cord, playing with chalk, and making a nest out of anything that was soft enough for her to bury her head into. Puff was also very affectionate though. At first, she was a little wary of me and would hide whenever I got too close. After a few days, the wariness went away and she warmed up to me quickly.
Ed chuckled, “That’s great, Al. I’m glad. It seems like you picked out a good cat.”
“I love her so much, Brother. Thank you for letting me get her!” I beamed, straightening up from my seat on the couch and watching as Puff pawed at one of her toys. It was actually one of Ed’s socks, but she seemed to really like them. “So how are things going?”
He sighed, tapping something on a hard surface, “Well, we’ve been sending scouting missions to locate the rebel hideouts, we believe we’ve found it and are sending in soldiers to keep an eye on it so we’re prepared for suspicious activity. They’re going to try and infiltrate it.”
“What? But isn’t that risky?” I frowned, not liking the sound of that plan, “You don’t know how many people are there.”
“That’s what I said. But that other guy, I don’t even know his name because I could care less, he thinks we should just go in and take out all the rebels. I told him we should just observe to make sure these are right guys and then pull some kind of sneak attack after we get more information, but he doesn’t listen to me!! It’s all very frustrating!” he growled, I could imagine him pulling on his hair, “I hate this. I wanna get out of here and come home.”
I leaned back into the couch, “When do you think you’ll be able to come home?”
“I don’t know, Al. Hopefully soon if we can just get the rebels to cooperate peacefully. But with the way things are going, I doubt the State wants to do anything peaceful.” Ed sounded bitter about all this, then brightened at something, “Well, a good thing is I’ll be able to call you tomorrow because that guy will be in some kind of meeting with the soldiers. So, sometime around eleven in the morning, okay Al?”
I smiled faintly at that, “Okay, Brother. I’ll be waiting. Be safe.”
“I will. You get a good night’s sleep, okay? I don’t want you to get a sore back because of that couch.” How did he..? I had been sleeping on the couch ever since Ed had left, I didn’t like the idea of being in the bedroom alone and I just felt comfortable on the couch. At least my sleep pattern was normal now.
“How did you know I was sleeping on the couch?” I gaped into the phone.
I could hear him grinning, “Lucky guess. Bye, Al!”
“Bye, Brother!” I waited for him to hang up first before placing the phone back where it should be, “Well, Puff, at least Brother’s getting his work done. That means he’ll be home soon, right?”
My kitten blinked up at me, then let out a small meow and went back to fighting the sock.
__________________________________________
I was annoyed with all the papers on the makeshift desk I had. It was basically a crate on top of another crate, and it was almost too tall for me. Almost. I growled at the close, indirect mention of my height, but didn’t act on it. All these stupid papers were giving me a headache too; a bunch of claims about what people saw when they were scouting the area and where the best places to attack would be. It would only end in disaster if we did it this way, but it wasn’t like anyone other than Havoc and a few others agreed with me. They were all following that bastard.
“Colonel Elric, there’s some trouble down in the south tent.” some guy came up to me, saluting and all that weird stuff.
I scowled, “Let that other Colonel handle it. He’s the one in charge of the south tents.”
“But, sir, he’s not there!”
I sighed and reluctantly went along with this soldier to see what the problem was. It was probably something stupid like last time; two soldiers had been fighting over a ration of water and it got out of control. I had to stop that fight last time too by saying I was going to bash their heads in with my metal limbs. That got everyone’s attention, especially since I was yelling it.
Shouts of alarm suddenly reached my ears, so I hurried up to see what was going on. Then there was a gunshot. Several gunshots and screams. We were being attacked. I grabbed the closest thing to me, which happened to be a rifle but I don’t use guns. I transmuted it into a spear and waited outside the tent flap until a guy came through. He was not one of our men and he was shooting straight ahead of him. I quickly whacked him in the head with the spear, just enough to knock him out. Several more men came out and were startled to have me attack them.
After taking out five men, I heard something that made my heart stop, “We need to find that little boy, apparently he’s close to that Colonel.”
I whipped around to see some bastards pointing at me and holding up my picture. MY picture of me and MY brother. I shouted several curses and flew into a frenzy. No way were they going to get their hands on my little brother! A good blow to my stomach had me sprawling backwards into the grips of several other guys. I struggled to and tried fight back, but a sharp pain in my head blurred my vision and I felt limp. Then it was all black.
__________________________________________
I shivered under the thin blanket, curling into myself as I stared at the silvery patch of moonlight on the floor. My body wouldn’t stop trembling, my eyes wide and focused on that one spot. The living room was clouded with shadows and my mind began playing tricks on me. It was like when I was little and scared of the dark; the shadows hid the monsters that were going to come out and eat me with their sharp teeth. Only, now the monsters had guns.
I whimpered helplessly, still trying to curl into myself even further. I wanted to hide in my brother’s arms. I wanted him to be home and safe. I had no idea what this dream meant… was it me there? Or was I just seeing things in Ed’s perspective? I didn’t know. It made my head hurt and I just wanted to call Ed and make sure he was okay. That bad people didn’t hurt him.
Brother’s fine… I’m just overreacting… He’ll call me tomorrow like he promised and then we can just laugh about my silly, paranoid dreams.
I thought to myself, absently stroking Puff for comfort. Everything will be alright in the morning…
__________________________________________
The phone didn’t ring for five days.
Title: Hand in Hand
Written by armor_of_guilt
Genre: Many things. Angst, fluff, and romancey (I keep forgetting to put the romance part in... oh well)
Pairings: Elricest
Warnings: Spoilers up to episode 51; AU; language; blood; giant red, rubber balls
Rating: PG-13 for now.
Story: Ongoing
[..X..]
[Distance makes the heart grow fonder]
I didn’t sleep.
How could I have slept? That information… It was just… I wasn’t expecting to find anything like that… Not from him. Not from my big brother.
All night, I just sat at his desk and read every single word on all those papers over and over… Each word was drilled into my head and memory. I could probably recite each note by heart now, not that I wanted to. The words were too sad. I couldn’t help the tears that now stained and smeared almost every line, even if they were all smeared from his hasty writing to begin with. I was torn between feeling ecstatic that my feelings were returned or sympathetic and distressed from the terrible things Ed wrote about himself. He’s not a bad big brother… he’s not dirty and filthy… he’s perfectly wonderful… These thoughts raced through my head and I just wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him that everything was okay and that he deserved me and we could be happy together. Just the two of us.
I’m such a hypocrite…
I sniffled, rocking back and forth in the chair that sat before Ed’s desk; all the tear-stained pages were turning pink and yellow from the rising sun. I feel exactly like he does, yet I’m saying it’s okay for him to feel like that… but it’s not for me… My note will probably make everything worse. He’ll feel guilty and maybe depressed, too. And I won’t be able to make him feel better because I’m not there.
I curled into myself further, my cheeks were all stiff and had trails of moisture painted on them. The house was silent, except for the clock ticking, and a shiver ran down my spine. How am I going to bring this up? “Oh, Brother, I knew you told me not to mess with your desk, but I did anyway and I just wanted to say that I love you too.” I snorted at the thought of doing that. It would get one hell of a reaction out of Ed, that’s for sure.
“I don’t deserve him… He’s too good for me…”
I sighed, absently fingering the slip of paper that might or might not have had that line written on it. It was all so complicated. If we both weren’t so fearful of what the other would think, then we wouldn’t be in this mess. Ed may not even have had to go so far away. I drew my hand back so I could hug my knees closer. I really missed him. Not even a day had passed and already the house felt empty and cold while I felt miserable and lonely. And nervous. The happy butterflies left when I had nothing to do but reflect on my brother’s self abuse. His self hatred. I couldn’t help but find it ironic that those words he used on himself would be applied to me as well. If he knew, of course.
But he doesn’t… because I was too much of a coward to tell him how I felt, even when he asked me all those times. How did he hide it so well? Wouldn’t he feel awkward when I pressed close to him or hugged him or kissed him on the cheek? Brother isn’t exactly the best at concealing his emotions, and he’s very vocal about stuff too. What makes this so different?
I must’ve dosed off in my train of thought because suddenly I heard the clock chime ten. Maybe I’m just oblivious.
__________________________________________
The phone rang twice before someone picked it up. It was that secretary lady, she had to patch the line into Mustang’s office again when I gave her the code. I asked specifically for “Brigadier General Mustang” so that I could speak directly to him and not deal with anything else at the moment.
“Hello?”
I stiffened at his laidback tone, almost as if he were bored. “Hello, General. It’s Alphonse.”
There was silence on the other line, papers rustling and a few coughs in background from his subordinates; then he spoke with a more serious tone, “What do you need, Al?”
“What do I need?” my fist clenched at the hints of degradation in his voice, almost like when he was telling Ed his place, “I need to know where my brother is and why he hasn’t called.”
“Al, it’s ten thirty in the morning. I don’t think he can call you from a train. Remember, he left late yesterday afternoon. He’s still on the train most likely. You probably won’t get a call from him for at least another day or two.” he told me, as if I should’ve already known this.
My head was pounding from a lack of sleep, “Another day? But I can’t wait that long…”
“You’ll be waiting longer than that most of the time. He shouldn’t even have permission to call anyone other than me, I’m making this an exception.” Mustang sounded irritated. “Who knows if he’ll even get the time to call you. It’s an assignment, not a vacation.”
I frowned in concentration, we never had to think about this before since we just had ourselves to talk to. We never had to call anyone other than the military when we were on actual assignments. Ed didn’t really like how the phone system was set up anyway. What if he doesn’t call me? At all. Who knows how long this will take… and if I don’t get a word from him…
Mustang could sense my change in mood, I think, he sounded more tolerant and sympathetic when he next spoke, “I’m sure it’s very hard for you to be without him, but you’ll have to try and deal with it. Alright?”
“Okay.” I nodded, my previous anger directed at him gone and replaced with some semblance of respect. Some. “Do you know when his train will get in?”
“I don’t. But tell you what, as soon as I hear anything from anyone in Ed’s party, I’ll let you know. Okay?”
I smiled sadly, but very grateful for any kind of help, “Thank you, General. Goodbye.”
“Goodbye.”
I placed the phone back in it’s cradle and ran a hand through my steadily growing hair. It was getting a little longer, I’d have to cut it soon. Or maybe I’d just grow it out like Ed’s. The nostalgic smile revived itself when I imagined us both with long hair, but somehow it seemed strange for me to have it, so I instead just pictured Ed. His long, golden hair braided neatly with haphazard bangs hanging in his face. Said face was still slightly rounded from childhood, but still angled with maturity and fast approaching adulthood. He’d always wear that silly grin, though. And his eyes would glimmer when he was really happy and excited and his cheeks would puff out when he pouted like a child, too.
“Enough…” I mumbled to myself, shaking my head so that I was brought back to reality where it was just me and the quiet, “I should do something useful while I’m just standing here.”
I decided to go and dust some shelves and photographs we had framed. There weren’t many; two were from my birthday party in Resembool about a month ago, one was of Ed and I in those rental suits we’d worn for the promotion ceremony, another was of Ed and I when we were younger and fishing somewhere, and then we had a picture of mom and the two of us that Winry had saved. Not a vast collection, but Ed had never really found a use for pictures. I was the one who insisted on framing some and setting them up on end tables and counters. I liked having the memories in a tangible form.
There were two pictures in the main room; one on the bookshelf and the other by the phone. I quickly skimmed over each area with the feather duster, then went back to do a more thorough job when I remembered I had plenty of time. I dusted each book binding and shelf; even the sides of the bookshelf were cleared. The little end table and phone were also taken care of. After dusting in there, I went into our bedroom where the remaining photographs were.
I had positioned the three on the nightstand between the two beds, so that they could be admired by both of us. But Ed didn’t look at them as often as I did. I blinked at the end table once I reached it. Something was missing. Instead of three photographs, there were only two. Pivoting around so that I could search the room, I was immediately distressed when I saw that it wasn’t here. I looked through the entire house, even under the couch and behind the fridge, but it wasn’t there.
“That one was my favorite…” I mused quietly, trying to come up with some explanation for why the picture of Ed and I on my birthday could be missing. “Where could it have gone?”
The first thing that came to mind was that Ed might’ve knocked it over when he was rampaging the other day, when he thought I wouldn’t come home, but that was checked off because I clearly remembered seeing it there when we were eating dinner before he had to pack. So it had gone missing sometime between yesterday morning and this morning.
“Maybe Brother took it?” The idea was possible; he might’ve wanted something to look at while he was bored in Lior or if he missed me. “But wouldn’t he have told me?” He was probably too embarrassed to say anything or too stubborn to admit that pictures were useful. “I guess I’ll ask him when he calls… along with everything else I have to ask him…”
When are you coming home? Are you eating okay? Do you love me? Did you take the picture with you? Will you be able to call me every day, twice a day like you promised? Do you really love me? Did you get my note? Do you love me more than a brother?
So many questions… they’d overwhelm him. I should stick to asking him a few at a time, so he doesn’t get flustered or concerned over the phone. I don’t want him to think that I’ve got nothing better to do than think of all these questions that I want to ask him, even if it is true.
I had successfully wasted an hour of my time by dusting and searching for the picture. Now that I knew that Ed loved me too, I saw no point in continuing to read those books I had borrowed. I can return the books to Sheska and maybe visit with her a little. Borrow some new books too. Then I could go for a walk and be able to take my mind off things.
“They believe that the rebellion is sending in terrorists to attack Central and destroy the military by creating distractions such as this one.”
I frowned, remembering Ed telling me about possible terrorists. I guess it wouldn’t be too smart for me to wander around Central all alone, especially if people could recognize me as the Fullmetal Alchemist’s younger brother. I highly doubted that though. Only Winry and Aunt Pinako and some choice people in the military knew what I really looked like. Everyone else thought I should be around seven feet tall and decked out in a suit of armor.
I flopped down onto the couch, rubbing my eyes sleepily. A few hours of dozing wasn’t going to cover a whole night of sleeplessness. Without anything else for me to do at the moment, I let myself drift off for a nap.
__________________________________________
A shrill ring roused me from sleep some time later. I whimpered in slight protest and rubbed my eyes to clear any traces of sleep from them. I yawned softly, covering my mouth politely, then looked around to see what it was that woke me up. The phone was sitting in it’s cradle and ringing loudly, whoever was calling was apparently determined to get through.
I blinked at it for a second, then flopped back down onto the couch with a groan, “Brother… get the phone!”
When I didn’t get a reply, I sat back up and pouted. My mind was still hazy from sleeping, so I wasn’t exactly in the mood to be answering a phone. I called for my brother a few more times, then gave up and assumed he was sleeping as well. Getting to my feet, I padded over to the table where the phone sat. The photograph that accompanied it smiled at me, then realization hit me.
“Oh yeah… Brother’s not home…” I mumbled, more awake and alert, “That means…” I gasped suddenly and grabbed the phone quickly before whoever it was could hang up. Oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please be Brother!! “Hello?”
“Finally!! I was wondering when you’d pick up!”
My heart fluttered happily and nervously at the familiar voice, “Brother!”
“Who else would it be, Al?” he was trying to tease me, but he sounded too happy to hear me for it to have much effect, “What took you so long to get to the phone?”
I smiled sheepishly, even though he couldn’t see it, “Oh, I was sleeping. Sorry.”
“You were sleeping? At five in the afternoon?” he asked me in a disbelieving tone.
I blinked at the clock that hung on the wall, “Wow… I didn’t know I slept that late. I took a nap around noon because I was a little tired.” he made some kind of affirmation noise, so I took it as a signal to continue talking, “How was your trip down there?”
He sighed, “Really long and boring… Almost three days too! I can’t believe how long it took. And there were no interesting people there with me! Except Havoc, he’s here too, so at least I have someone to talk to. But apparently, there’s another Colonel here. He’s not from Mustang’s jurisdiction, but the higher ups thought Mustang might need some back up. Stupid assholes…” he muttered some other stuff, making me grin in spite of myself, “Well, anyways, he’s here and he’s a real tight ass. He reminds me of Mustang, only not lazy. Or as lenient. Actually… his arrogance is the only thing that reminds me of Mustang. The cocky bastard… So, he a Colonel also and he’s acting like he runs the place and won’t let me have a say in any of it! He even made this stupid rule for me, I can’t talk on the phone everyday. Hell! He won’t even let me call once a week, Al! He said ‘On occasion’ in that stuffy, stupid voice of his. Damn, I hate him!”
“What?” I felt my giddy mood falter with that news, “You can’t call?”
Ed seemed to have settled down a little, “I’m sorry, Al. But he really wants us all to be focused on our work and he thinks that me talking with you will distract me. He’s completely ignoring that we’re the same rank. It’s not fair.”
I could imagine my older brother pouting and folding his arms across his chest for emphasis. “I’m sorry, too, Brother. That doesn’t sound fair at all. Maybe you could ask the General-”
“No way am I asking that bastard for anything. He’s already done enough by sending me here.” he groaned, I could almost see him rubbing at his temple in annoyance, “You wouldn’t like it here, Al… it’s barren and the only thing you can see for miles are the scattered tents of some citizens of Lior and the construction site of the new city. Other than that it’s just desert and military. And it’s so damn hot here!”
It was almost summer, so it wasn’t the best time for them to be out in the desert. “I’m really sorry, Brother. I hope you’ll be able to come home soon and get away from all that.”
“Yeah… I’ve been here a grand total of one day and I already feel nauseous thinking of this place.” he mumbled.
I blinked, “Wait… you said that the train ride was almost three days, so how could you have be there for one day already?” That didn’t make any sense. He left yesterday… So how could…?
“Al, I left four days ago. Remember? The damn bastard wouldn’t let me call you until now.”
“Four days ago?” I didn’t have to calculate this to know what had happened, I had slept for three days! That wasn’t good… I haven’t slept that long since back when I was getting used to my body.
“Al? You still with me?” Ed was asking me, “How long did you sleep? That nap must’ve eaten away at some of your brain.”
I laughed nervously, “Well… I guess it wasn’t really a nap… I slept for three days. Heh, funny isn’t it, Brother?”
“What?” he sounded very confused, “How can you sleep for three days straight!? You have got to be kidding me, Al! Don’t you have stuff to do? Didn’t you eat?!”
I winced, “Ah, so that’s why I’m so hungry…” Ed was not happy. “I’m sorry, I guess I just had nothing to do so I slept. And slept… and I still have nothing to do. It’s weird.”
“There’s nothing for you to do at all?”
“Well… I get sidetracked and start worrying about you.” I told him tentatively, “I can’t concentrate on anything and then it gets… kind of lonely…”
Ed didn’t say anything for a minute, I was worried we might’ve got disconnected, “Brother?”
“Hey, Al? I know I’m going to regret this later… but I don’t want to be lonely and just sleep while I’m gone. That’s not healthy. So… why don’t you get yourself some company? You… you’ve always wanted a cat… right?”
I gasped, “Really?! Really, you mean it, Brother?! I can get a cat?!”
“Yeah, yeah. You can.” He half chuckled, half sighed. “As long as you take care of it and keep it away from me when I get back.”
I was almost bursting from excitement, “Oh yes! I will, Brother! I promise! You’re the best big brother ever!” I was just about to make a mental list of what I’d need for the kitty and what kind of kitty I’d get, when I remembered what I had wanted to ask him. “Hey, Brother?”
“Yeah, Al?” Ed still sounded so happy, even if he was trying to hide it. I felt guilty for having to spoil the moment by asking this, but I had to know.
I took a deep breath, then asked, “Do you love me?”
“No, Al. I just said you could get a kitten and spent four years trying to get your body back so we could live a comfortable life together. Of course I love you, you dope!” he was laughing. It wasn’t funny. It wasn’t his normal laugh, this was forced.
“Brother… you know I love you, right?” I tried a different approach.
“Are you talking about that note, Al? The one you put in my book?” he inquired curiously, “Because I know, you tell me almost every chance you get. Why? Is something wrong?”
“I just want you to know… and you can tell me anything, Brother. I’d never judge you. I’d never cast you away or hate you. I could never. I just want you to know that, okay? Just in case there’s ever something you want to tell me.”
That got him. My brother’s end of the phone was strangely quiet. He was probably suspicious now, and paranoid. I waited patiently for him to say something.
“Okay, Al.” was the final product of his thoughts, “I’ll keep that in mind. Oh, that damn bastard’s kicking me off. I have to go now, Al. Sorry-!”
“Wait, Brother! One more question!” I called to him before he could hang up.
“What?” he sounded nervous, scared almost.
I sighed, “Do you know what happened to the picture of me and you that used to be on our nightstand in our room? You know, from my birthday party?”
“Oh, yeah, that.” he sounded like he was rushing. Maybe he really did have to get off, “I borrowed it. A little memento thing. Is that all you need?”
I nodded sadly, “Yeah that’s all. Thank you, Brother. Be safe and call soon.”
“Yeah, I will.”
“I love you.”
“I do too, you sap. Don’t sleep for another three days! Callyousoonbye!” his fast, jumbled words were the last things ringing in my ears before the line went dead.
“Bye, Brother…”
That had been all the proof I needed. He really was flustered when it came to love, he really did think I meant it in a platonic way and he must’ve been right in those notes, otherwise he wouldn’t have avoided saying it back to me. I gently placed the phone back on the cradle once the dial tone got too sad for me to hear. The house was suddenly very empty again and I silently willed the phone to ring again and have Ed be on the other line so he could apologize and say that he loved me too. Even though I know he does, it still means a lot for me to hear it.
The phone didn’t ring again.
__________________________________________
I ignored my brother’s request and slept on the couch for another whole day before deciding enough was enough. I wanted that kitty.
I waited until Ed had been gone for a whole week before going out in search of a kitty friend. I wanted to make the house cat-safe and also set up a little place for it to eat in the kitchen and sleep and do it’s business. I used alchemy to make the litter box lined with newspaper, kitty bed, and food dishes by altering regular cardboard boxes and extra dishes we didn’t need. The toys I managed to make by getting old newspaper and odds and ends found around the house. I wanted to save as much of Ed’s money as possible, plus I hadn’t used alchemy in a while. It was nice and nostalgic to sit there on the kitchen floor and draw the little circle with chalk and watch the objects alter before my eyes.
So, I had successfully made the items a kitty needed to be happy. Now all I needed was the kitten and some cat food, kitty litter, and maybe a brush. The pound was where I was going first. I wanted to rescue a cat, so what better place than the pound? Then I’d stop by the store and pick up the cat food. Then I’d be all set!
I was so excited. Almost as excited as when Ed first took me around Central in my new body. The excitement had given me something to focus on, instead of Ed being gone and out in the open where he could get hurt… I shivered involuntarily and chased the thought away. He’d be fine. He said so. Focus on the cat. I told myself, not wanting to get upset over Ed being gone again.
What happened next must have been fate. One second, I was walking along and the next, a large, red rubber ball narrowly misses me. What the heck? It bounced into the alley next to me and I looked over in the direction the ball came from and saw a small group of children across the street. They all looked a little apprehensive about crossing the street, so they all looked to me.
“Hey, mister!” the youngest, a little girl, called out to me, “Can you get our ball, please?”
I smiled despite myself, I looked older compared to those kids. To them, I was the adult. I nodded happily, “Sure.” I didn’t mind helping those kids out. Carefully stepping into the alley, I easily picked out the red rubber ball amidst all the junk. Once I had it securely in my hands, I paused when I heard a soft scratching noise and a tiny cry. Feeling curiosity get the better of me, and definitely recognizing that kind of cry, I peered around the piles of junk and spotted something small and furry.
I ran out of the alley and tossed the kids their ball, before going back into the alley to rescue what I had stumbled upon. A kitten. I scooped up the little thing into my hands easily, it’s pathetic cries for either food or warmth tugged at my heartstrings. Carrying it out into the light, I gasped when I saw how sad it was. The kitten was so small and scrawny, it’s ribs were sticking out and it’s fur was all matted and filthy. I couldn’t even tell what shade of fur it had. Not that it mattered, I fell in love with the kitten as soon as it nuzzled my hand with it’s soft, but tangled, head.
I carried the kitten in my hands gently, I didn’t have any time for the store now. I needed to get the kitten home so I could warm them and wash them and probably get away with feeding them some chicken. I hadn’t gotten very far in my walk, so I was home fairly quickly with my new pet and immediately got to bathing them in the bathroom sink.
During the kitten’s bath, I discovered that she was a girl. I was able to shift my fingers through her fur easily, getting rid of the little tangles with Ed’s comb. I used basic hand soap as a shampoo, since I had nothing else on hand. Once she was all clean and dry, she looked a little healthier, though she was still meowing pitifully. I was actually surprised that she didn’t fight me, then I noticed her injured paw. I wrapped it up as best as I could, then I wrapped her up in a fluffy hand towel that I warmed with the hairdryer.
She was a beautiful little thing from what I could see so far. Her coat was still a little coarse because of her health, but I was sure it would soften up soon. Now that she was all clean, I could tell that she was an interesting mixture of colors. Her head and back were a tawny-orange color, like amber. Her stomach and legs were a paler color, less orange and more beige. Her face and one paw though, were a snowy white and she had large, dark blue eyes that were so innocent looking. I fell in love with her all over again.
“You’re so cute!” I cooed gently, stroking her small head before setting her down in the kitchen so I could get her some food. “Let’s see… here’s some chicken…”
I took some of the leftover chicken I had used for dinner the other day and tore it into tiny, edible shreds for her to eat. I placed them in her bowl and then got some milk for her too. I knew that milk wasn’t always the best thing for cats to have, but she was still a little baby and needed some extra fattening. She was so scrawny, I figured she was the runt and had been abandoned by the rest of the litter.
“Poor, little kitty.” I sat cross-legged on the floor and watched her devour the chicken scraps hungrily. “Well, don’t you worry. Now you have a home here with me and Brother. We’ll take good care of you. Hmm, but you’re going to need a name.”
I sat there for a while, unable to decide on a name for my new kitten. It had to be just right. Something that suited her; both physically and personality-wise. “I’ll just have to wait for the right name to come to me… won’t I, kitty?”
The little bundle of fur yawned with a small squeak, then curled up in the towels for a nap. She had eaten all the chicken I gave her and drank all the milk, too. I smiled and just watched her sleep for a few minutes before getting up to clean her bowls.
__________________________________________
Puff.
Well, her full name was Creampuff, but Puff just seemed to stick with my cute, fluffy ball of fur. In the past three days of me owning her, she had made a pretty good recovery. Her fur had fluffed out and was nice and soft and very puffy; hence her name. I loved to stroke her, because then I could feel her chest rumble as she purred. She wasn’t a very old kitten; I took her to the vet the day after I found her to check for anything that could be wrong and he said that she couldn’t be more than nine weeks old and was very sickly. I knew that kittens were supposed to leave their mothers at around eight weeks or so, but usually to an owner. I didn’t think it was good for a young kitten, or any cat actually, to be out and abandoned.
Other than the fact that she needed lots of food, Puff was free from any disease. I was very happy to tell Ed this when called.
“And her meow is so sweet!” I was babbling into the phone happily, so thankful for having my new friend and my brother to talk to too. “I can’t wait for you to see her, Brother! I know you’ll like her!”
Actually, that was just a hope of mine. I wasn’t too sure if Ed would like having her curious nature around. She was continuously getting into mischief; climbing on top of the book case, chewing on the phone cord, playing with chalk, and making a nest out of anything that was soft enough for her to bury her head into. Puff was also very affectionate though. At first, she was a little wary of me and would hide whenever I got too close. After a few days, the wariness went away and she warmed up to me quickly.
Ed chuckled, “That’s great, Al. I’m glad. It seems like you picked out a good cat.”
“I love her so much, Brother. Thank you for letting me get her!” I beamed, straightening up from my seat on the couch and watching as Puff pawed at one of her toys. It was actually one of Ed’s socks, but she seemed to really like them. “So how are things going?”
He sighed, tapping something on a hard surface, “Well, we’ve been sending scouting missions to locate the rebel hideouts, we believe we’ve found it and are sending in soldiers to keep an eye on it so we’re prepared for suspicious activity. They’re going to try and infiltrate it.”
“What? But isn’t that risky?” I frowned, not liking the sound of that plan, “You don’t know how many people are there.”
“That’s what I said. But that other guy, I don’t even know his name because I could care less, he thinks we should just go in and take out all the rebels. I told him we should just observe to make sure these are right guys and then pull some kind of sneak attack after we get more information, but he doesn’t listen to me!! It’s all very frustrating!” he growled, I could imagine him pulling on his hair, “I hate this. I wanna get out of here and come home.”
I leaned back into the couch, “When do you think you’ll be able to come home?”
“I don’t know, Al. Hopefully soon if we can just get the rebels to cooperate peacefully. But with the way things are going, I doubt the State wants to do anything peaceful.” Ed sounded bitter about all this, then brightened at something, “Well, a good thing is I’ll be able to call you tomorrow because that guy will be in some kind of meeting with the soldiers. So, sometime around eleven in the morning, okay Al?”
I smiled faintly at that, “Okay, Brother. I’ll be waiting. Be safe.”
“I will. You get a good night’s sleep, okay? I don’t want you to get a sore back because of that couch.” How did he..? I had been sleeping on the couch ever since Ed had left, I didn’t like the idea of being in the bedroom alone and I just felt comfortable on the couch. At least my sleep pattern was normal now.
“How did you know I was sleeping on the couch?” I gaped into the phone.
I could hear him grinning, “Lucky guess. Bye, Al!”
“Bye, Brother!” I waited for him to hang up first before placing the phone back where it should be, “Well, Puff, at least Brother’s getting his work done. That means he’ll be home soon, right?”
My kitten blinked up at me, then let out a small meow and went back to fighting the sock.
__________________________________________
I was annoyed with all the papers on the makeshift desk I had. It was basically a crate on top of another crate, and it was almost too tall for me. Almost. I growled at the close, indirect mention of my height, but didn’t act on it. All these stupid papers were giving me a headache too; a bunch of claims about what people saw when they were scouting the area and where the best places to attack would be. It would only end in disaster if we did it this way, but it wasn’t like anyone other than Havoc and a few others agreed with me. They were all following that bastard.
“Colonel Elric, there’s some trouble down in the south tent.” some guy came up to me, saluting and all that weird stuff.
I scowled, “Let that other Colonel handle it. He’s the one in charge of the south tents.”
“But, sir, he’s not there!”
I sighed and reluctantly went along with this soldier to see what the problem was. It was probably something stupid like last time; two soldiers had been fighting over a ration of water and it got out of control. I had to stop that fight last time too by saying I was going to bash their heads in with my metal limbs. That got everyone’s attention, especially since I was yelling it.
Shouts of alarm suddenly reached my ears, so I hurried up to see what was going on. Then there was a gunshot. Several gunshots and screams. We were being attacked. I grabbed the closest thing to me, which happened to be a rifle but I don’t use guns. I transmuted it into a spear and waited outside the tent flap until a guy came through. He was not one of our men and he was shooting straight ahead of him. I quickly whacked him in the head with the spear, just enough to knock him out. Several more men came out and were startled to have me attack them.
After taking out five men, I heard something that made my heart stop, “We need to find that little boy, apparently he’s close to that Colonel.”
I whipped around to see some bastards pointing at me and holding up my picture. MY picture of me and MY brother. I shouted several curses and flew into a frenzy. No way were they going to get their hands on my little brother! A good blow to my stomach had me sprawling backwards into the grips of several other guys. I struggled to and tried fight back, but a sharp pain in my head blurred my vision and I felt limp. Then it was all black.
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I shivered under the thin blanket, curling into myself as I stared at the silvery patch of moonlight on the floor. My body wouldn’t stop trembling, my eyes wide and focused on that one spot. The living room was clouded with shadows and my mind began playing tricks on me. It was like when I was little and scared of the dark; the shadows hid the monsters that were going to come out and eat me with their sharp teeth. Only, now the monsters had guns.
I whimpered helplessly, still trying to curl into myself even further. I wanted to hide in my brother’s arms. I wanted him to be home and safe. I had no idea what this dream meant… was it me there? Or was I just seeing things in Ed’s perspective? I didn’t know. It made my head hurt and I just wanted to call Ed and make sure he was okay. That bad people didn’t hurt him.
Brother’s fine… I’m just overreacting… He’ll call me tomorrow like he promised and then we can just laugh about my silly, paranoid dreams.
I thought to myself, absently stroking Puff for comfort. Everything will be alright in the morning…
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The phone didn’t ring for five days.