[fic] Our Environment - Chapter Three
One yellow eye opened halfway and Ward let out a long yawn as he stretched his arms. His body felt so weighted down. An idle glance down showed the sleeping Heiderich draped across his legs and half his chest, quiet whuffs released with each breath as his companion - mate? - clung to him. Carefully Ward wiggled his way out from under Fons’ heavier ones, moving slowly as he untangled their legs.
The Elric crawled his way out of the den and rolled around on the oddly white ground, loosening all the kinks out of his body. He gave a final wiggle and glared at the shiny floor. The hardness wasn’t the same as the forest floor he had gotten used to. Ward could hardly believe he used to live like this, it was so confining. He huffed to himself and clambered over to the water. Giving a wary look at the water rock the human had peed in, he made his way over to the furthest one and gave it a few tentative licks. It tasted like the funny metallic water he used to get when he was Master’s. Ward shoved that memory to the side and stuck his head into the water-rock, gulping down the water quickly and grimacing at the taste.
He gave a quick splash of water to his face, letting the coldness wake him up completely from his after sleep daze. The weird den-suns flickered and Ward felt mildly disorientated; wondered if it was really morning or if he had slept late. It was so hard to tell with the suns that never turned off. The Elric bared his teeth rebelliously at the small suns and padded his way back to the den entryway.
Fons was awake.
Ward gave a pleased smile and slumped down next to his companion-mate. <’Morning!’> He hummed, flicked a tail.
Fons blinked slowly at him.
Ward decided he wasn’t entirely awake yet.
<’Want some food?’> Ward enquired, watching intently for any signs of communication. Fons blinked then whuffed. The Elric took it as a <’Yes’> and grabbed their pelt of food. His hands quickly untangled it and selected a squirrel, wrapping the rest of their storage up.
<’Hey.’> He chirped. <’Watch this!’> Glazed grey eyes focussed on Ward as he clapped his hand and touched the squirrel. The ozone smell erupted as the squirrel became warm and cooked, ready for eating. The Elric proudly presented half of it to the - his - Heiderich. Fons perked up at the smell of food and quickly grabbed it into his hands. He nibbled at it delicately while Ward took huge bites and rips out of his share.
The two munched contentedly on their halves.
Neither expected the door to swing open with a loud THUMP, stronger light from outside framing two humans; several darker human shapes looming in the background.
The Elric and the Heiderich were silent as they stared blankly at the interlopers in their territory, food held forgotten in their hands.
One of the humans shuffled awkwardly and gave a couch, the sudden sound startling them out of their bewilderment. Fons ducked his head quickly back into the den, Ward quickly clambering after him. The Edward clapped his hands and hit the ground, closing off the den behind them as they crouched in their paper-nest.
Ward snarled crankily, it was too early in the morning for him to deal with more stupid humans. He narrowed his eyes and flicked his ears, listening to the dumb beasts stumbling around outside with contempt. He couldn’t believe he used to submit - reluctantly - to them.
Yellow eyes shifted to check up on his Alfons before flickering back to the blocked entryway. He had a job to do now, never again would he submit to humans; the Elric vowed.
Fons was growling under his breath as the humans banged around outside, eyes narrowed to mere slits; previously harmless hands hooked in preparation.
Their barrier collapsed with a large crash and dust spilled everywhere. Fons hissed in startlement, eyes wide. Ward watched the entryway anxiously as a human peered in and called something back to its fellows. There was a commotion outside as another human stuck its head in the entryway and glanced around. The Edward flattened his ears in clear warning and hovered his hands close to each other. He watched warily as the human communicated back and forth with its fellows, not recognising any of the ‘words’ they spoke with.
Something was tossed into their den; small, red and round. They both regarded it with suspicion, the Heiderich edged even further away and melted into the corners. Ward leaned closer and gave it a cautious sniff. Was it food? Was it a turr-reat?
He poked it.
The round thing cracked open and a hissing noise came out of it. He shot back to join Fons in the corner as a red gas filled the den with a putrid scent. Ward coughed as it gagged them and burnt their eyes.
<’What are they doing to us?!’> Fons hissed, hands held firmly over his nose.
<’I don’t know!’> Ward managed to gasp in reply, his eyes streamed as his lungs burned for fresh air. The Edward lunged blindly for the entryway, desperately wanting fresh air. He stuck his head out of the den and managed one deep gasping breath before the solid weight of two humans stuck him to the floor. He barely even managed a surprised yip.
<’W-Ward?’> Fons called at him hoarsely from the den. <’What’s going on?!’>
<’Don’t come out!’> Ward called back. <’The humans got me! They’ll get you too!’> He struggled frantically, but the humans held him down securely with his hands separated. The Edward snarled and twisted his head, sinking his teeth into the flesh of the closest arm. He held on tight and grinned at the human’s wails of pain, he clenched his teeth tighter in response.
Other humans were responding to his prey’s calls, gathering around them. Ward flinched his eyes shut and waited for the attack.
No attack happened and his eyes went wide with surprise when a heavily pelted hand clamped down on his nose.
He couldn’t breathe! Ward blinked in alarm, ears working frantically while his tail lashed angrily side to side. If he wanted to breathe he would have to let go of the human, but if he let go his only chance of defence would be gone. He whined in frustration in the back of his throat, unable to make a decision. Eventually his own body worked against him and the Elric’s jaw unlocked, body gasping more air in.
The human-prey was being fussed over by the others while Ward wailed and complained on the ground, the other two humans holding him down. The embarrassingly submissive posture kept him from clapping his hands or doing anything other than thrashing his head side to side in the hope of catching someone with his teeth.
Fons was calling out to him anxiously, huddling in the den’s entryway for air with eyes watching the humans warily.
<’Are you alright? What are they doing to you?’> His Alfons asked plaintively, flinching at any movement in his direction.
Ward growled in frustration. <’I’m fine. I don’t know what they’re doing.’> He snarled. <’They’re keeping my hands apart, I can’t clap.’> He whined.
The humans were mostly ignoring him now. They were all dressed the same in bright yellow pelts, and the one Ward had decided was the pack leader was walking around their outer-den, gesturing at the water-rocks and the inner den. Ward snarled and hissed as they stood over him.
The human-leader had crouched down near him, nattering on some nonsense to the human-predators holding him down. Ward grumbled and grimaced as the human-leader patted his head roughly like the Master used to do. He shook his head and snapped teeth, just missing the human’s fingers.
Ward grinned triumphantly at the human.
The human-leader talked some more to the predator humans and then walked off towards the den. The Edward called out a warning for Fons. <’The human-leader is going to you! Hide, hide!’>
Fons gave a yip and ducked back into the foul smelling den.
The human-predators were doing something weird with some ropes. They had tied one around his wrist then stood off to the side, pulling it taught and keeping his arm stretched out. It was repeated on his other side and the humans got off him.
They weren’t holding him down. Ward shot up and went to clap -.
The humans on either side kept his hands spread apart. The Elric tried to bring his hands close together, but the ropes around each wrist kept them separate. They had restrained him! He tried to strike out in response, but whichever way he moved the rope on the other side of him held him taunt.
He gave a plaintive wail. Why were they doing this to him? Ward tried to make a run for the den but was brought up short. Again.
<’Ward?’> Fons had poked his head out of the den anxiously, ducking back slightly at the sight of the human-leader.
One of the ropes tugged him. Ward resisted against the pull until a hard tug made him stumble on his feet. He struggled as the humans slowly dragged him outside of the white den, lunging every so often at one of the humans. The Edward was terrified, unable to understand what they were doing and incapable of defending himself or Fons.
<’Fons!’> He gave a frustrated howl. <’They’re taking me away! I can’t clap! Fons! Help! I don’t wanna go back!’> Ward yowled at the humans, struggled and pulled against the ropes. It did nothing but make his wrists hurt. <’Fons!’>
<’Ward? Ward!’> The Alfons called out after him. With a burst of speed, Fons had shoved out past the human-leader and dashed at the human-predators. The human twisted to the side and Fons hissed and spat at them. Ward lunged at his other captor, but it was unsuccessful.
They had been dragged and forced out into the giant underground den with its large metal machines. Everywhere there were humans, most of them gathered behind flimsy plastic fences and watching them intently. Fons gave a defiant howl at them while Ward struggled to free himself from the bonds restraining his hands. The human-leader was blocking the entry to their white den as Ward was wrangled a few more metres away from it.
His Heiderich gave a few more attempts of attacks at the humans, even managed to cuff one of them on the arm. Fons left a line of red across the humans arm and Ward grinned proudly at his Heiderich. Fons continued to circle the humans, hissing abuse and calling out to Ward. <’Are you okay?’> He repeated.
<’I’m fine!’> He grumbled at the humans. <’I don’t know what is up with these bastards. Makes me miss Sting. He’d blow them sky-high.’> He relished the idea.
The human-leader called out. The Edward tensed himself as he anxiously awaited what happened next.
His captors released the bonds holding his hands and they fell away loosely, Ward staring dumbfounded. What the hell?
Fons rushed over to him as the humans backed away and blocked off their escape route to their den. <’Are you hurt? Did they hurt you? Oh!’> Fons gave an upset huff, <’Look at your poor wrists!’> His Heiderich carefully licked at the Elric’s wrists, one eye and ear constantly on the humans. Ward watched them while Fons checked him over, back arched stiffly and tail erect.
The Alfons bared his teeth at the humans. <’Touch him again and I’ll kill you.’> He hissed.
Ward awkwardly patted his companion-mate’s shoulder. <’I’m alright. It’s no point anyway.’> He glared disdainfully at the humans. <’Humans are stupid and can’t speak anything but nonsense.’>
The humans illustrated his point by suddenly making an awful racket. They were all waving their arms and yelling nonsense at the animals.
Fons flicked an ear, raised a lip in contempt. <’True. Horrible creatures. Let’s get away from them.’>
They hovered where they were. All exists were blocked. Ward felt his ire rising again. Stupid humans.
<’Quick! Come this way!’> Fons was waving him over to the long monster. <’It’s like a tunnel inside the monster. I’m sure it has an exit!’>
Ward reluctantly trailed after his Alfons, but not before sticking his finger up in a time-honoured Elric gesture of dislike at the humans. He hissed at them once more before stalking off after Fons. Stupid humans, he muttered under his breath. Peeing in water and chasing them out of their den, the whole species was crazy.
The Edward gazed at the mouth of the monster, hesitantly sidling up to it. Fons was already in it, waiting for him.
<’Hurry up Ward. The humans are watching.’> The Heiderich urged.
Ward didn’t want to show weakness before the humans. He stepped quickly onto the monster and followed Fons over to a corner. The voice that had been so silent in his head for so long was buzzing up again, telling him to sit and wait. Ward told Fons. Fons nodded and agreed.
<’If your instincts say to sit and wait, we will sit and wait.’>
They waited, watching with appalled eyes as humans entered the monster and sat down on the red tongues all along the sides. Eventually the monster started roaring and the Heiderich started hopping all over the place in excitement.
<’It’s moving! The monster is moving like a giant worm through the soil! Look at it move!’> Fons chattered excitedly, all previous trauma forgotten.
Ward sulked in his corner, glanced at the humans every so often to ensure they didn’t try to bind his hands again. One of the small humans, a really small human, was walking over to him.
He flattened ears.
It walked closer and he bared his teeth in warning.
It stared at him and Ward stared back. He twitched his tail fretfully.
The human grabbed his tail and pulled on it. Ward hissed and Fons shot down from his perch to cuff at the human tormenting his Edward. They watched warily as the small human stumbled back and began to wail not unlike a kit, a larger human rushing over to it. When the large human faced the two, they both bared their teeth and watched in satisfaction as it scrambled back, chattering at highspeed in its nonsense language.
Ward tucked himself up closer to Fons. <’Stupid human, I warned it. Twice. It still attacked my tail!’>
The Heiderich fussed over him, fixing up his braid and grooming behind his ears. <’My poor Edward, the humans have been so cruel to you today. Were they always like this?’>
<’Not normally. Maybe my old Master was a smart human, all the ones so far have been really stupid.’>
Fons hummed back at him, swaying with the monster’s movements. <’Lets get out of the monster when it stops.’> He suggested, <’Go find somewhere away from the humans.’>
Ward nodded in agreement.
The two huddled up together and waited for the monster to stop.
It did stop, several times. Each time it stopped more humans entered and a few left, never leaving enough time for them to dart off. They lingered together, watching the stops. Eventually Ward noticed a pattern. <’Hey, haven’t we seen some of these stops before?’>
Fons blinked at the surroundings outside. <’Yes. I think the monster is ill. It’s going around in circles.’>
<’Humans really are crazy. Who travels in circles except to protect territory?’>
They waited some more. It was getting cold and dark when there were finally few enough humans for Fons and Ward to make their escape, shooting out of the monster’s mouth and out into the open. They looked around quickly before scampering off together down the dark hard pathways. Neither stopped running until they found a small forest nestled between the giant square dens. They stopped panting near a square pond, quickly lapping at the cool water.
<’We should get a den for the night.’> Fons commented as they looked around.
Ward’s stomach growled.
<’First we need to fill your tummy!’> His Alfons remarked cheerfully, whuffing as his own stomach growled. <’There must be food somewhere.’> All their food stores had been left behind at the white den, forced to be abandoned by those stupid humans.
They sniffed at the air. Ward caught the hint of something familiar. <’Quick Fons, follow me!’>
He trotted off, pausing only to sniff and orientate himself. They only had to pass a few more human dens before Ward found space between them. They squeezed their way through, the Edward clapping his hands to make an opening in the fence they came across. Before them was an even smaller forest, barely the size of the gunbu’s den. There was also the source of the delicious smell sitting in one large metal bowl. They contemplated it, eying the odd animal guarding it.
The animal hissed at them, its tail rising like an Elric’s. Only it wasn’t an Elric. Which meant it was prey.
Ward moved quickly, clapping the ground and using a stone hand to snap its neck quickly. <’I caught us food!’> He puffed out proudly, delighted in his newfound control with clapping.
The Edward deflated when he realised Fons hadn’t seen his smooth, quick and amazing hunting skills. The Heiderich was busy stuffing his face with the prey’s food, cheeks bulging around his dinner. Ward snorted in amusement.
<’Whargght?’> His Alfons swallowed. <’What? I’m hungry and this is really good!’>
Ward’s interest was perked. He sauntered over and took a sniff. It did smell good, not that there was much left. It looked like a wet version of the dry food Master had fed him. He quickly snagged what was left while Fons inspected his kill.
<’We’re going to have to start our storage up all over again.’> The Alfons lamented. <’What is this animal? It’s like a giant rat-squirrel.’>
Ward shrugged. <’As long as it tastes nice, who cares?’>
<’True.’> Fons swung it over his shoulder. <’We really should find a den for the night.’>
Ward looked around distastefully. <’Not this forest. It’s too...neat.’> It was oddly neat, with berry bushes in rows and many flowers. Too many. The Edward sneezed.
He rubbed his nose as climbed up onto the fence. <’Ah-ha!’>
<’What?’> Fons looked up at him as Ward looked down. He liked this feeling of height.
<’I see a den we can use. It’s only six square forests away.’> He chirped delightedly. <’We can use that and I’ll fortify it extra strong so humans can’t get in.’>
<’Sounds good, lead the way!’> Fons smiled at him, head nudging the Elric’s leg. He smiled back pleased; glad he could care for his Heiderich.
<’This way! This way!’> He leapt over the fence, Fons following slightly slower.
Eventually they reached the square forest Ward had described. It had longer grass and trees, along with a square den made of wood. They entered the den and Ward clapped his hands, making a smaller and very thick walled circular den for the two. Fons crawled in with the Edward quickly following. Inside was just enough room for the two to sit up and curl together in rest. Fons stuffed their prey in the corner and Ward clapped protection around it to keep the flies out.
Fons sighed happily as they rolled up together, Ward enjoyed the warmth he got from this while his Heiderich absently groomed him behind his ears. The Edward gave some tentative grooming licks in return, clumsy as he tried to return the favour. Fons chuckled at him.
<’Y’know Ward.’> He purred. <’I didn’t want to stay there anyway, after that human peed in the water.’>
Ward hummed in agreement.
<’Stupid humans. You don’t pee in water.’>
They pressed their faces into each other’s shoulder and fell asleep to the comforting scent of a companion-mate.
= = =
Subway drama: wild vandalism
Late last night officials were notified of the destruction and rearrangement of a public toilet in the Amestris subway train station.
The culprits were a pair of courting animals; an Edward and his mate. During the day beforehand, the two were seen entering the station but disappeared only to be found later by a passenger when he went to use the bathroom.
“They were all in the corner ferocious like, snarling.” Mr. Risem described. “I’d just taken a piss and they attacked me!”
The bathroom in question will need to be completely remodelled. The Edward had destroyed several key water pipes as well as the internal structure of the walls and floor when making the den. Additionally, all the toilet paper had been removed from the stalls and used in the den.
The local trains had to be halted while the Amestris Society for the Protection and Care of Animals (ASPCA) brought in some experienced volunteers to remove the animals. Careful methods were used to herd them out, although some injuries were sustained by the volunteers.
A nearby group of Xingese tourists were delighted with the turnout and a sizable crowd gathered to watch.
The animals were last seen on the local train where they stayed for the rest of the day.