[fic] State of Mind - Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Thirteen
The white snow reflected the morning light into Ward’s squinting eyes. He was still unsure of this stuff that had made him so miserable the night before. Concentrating hard, he pressed his hands together and pushed them into the cold dust. A crackle and blue light flared before him at the snow hardened into the clear shape of a ( Read more... )
The white snow reflected the morning light into Ward’s squinting eyes. He was still unsure of this stuff that had made him so miserable the night before. Concentrating hard, he pressed his hands together and pushed them into the cold dust. A crackle and blue light flared before him at the snow hardened into the clear shape of a ( Read more... )
I forgot to say - Ward's immediate decision between rivaling points of interest is - Fons has given food but Sting has proved to be a source of protection and he can learn things...but Ward is selfish and wants both if he can.
I just remembered something that I don't think I've quite managed to incorporate into the story. Does this make it clearer for you if I do somehow sneak it in?
Views differ between the characters. Sting is thinking "my pack, my mates. The more in the pack; the better for protection/food/can get pups"
but Ward is thinking "protection for me, food for me with a vague afterthought of companionship"
While Fons is an altogether different view residing around "Ward is the only potential mate around. Ward is in the pack. Therefore Fons will be in the pack" - but Fons doesn't personally consider himself as part of the pack (as opposed to Sting who thinks he is of pack and Ward who just notices that he is there). He's only going to be around as long as Ward is - and he'll still keep his distance from Sting because Sting is a Mustang, a big, badass predator...but Hughes and the Havoc to a lessor extent are acceptable companions.
FFFFF I hope you like chapter 14. I had so much fun writing it down from inside my head.
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Well, the font changes are still present. Perhaps you would see it if you previewed the post? To fix it: If you use Word (or maybe another program) you could copy/paste it to that program, select everything, select a font, then copy/paste it back to LJ. This is only if it bothers you. I'm a stickler for continuity of all kinds, so that's what I would do.
Thank you for all the other fixes! The comment limit is 3500 characters, if you want to know.
About the different views: you've managed to convey them pretty well, already. I had gotten Sting and Ward, sort of, but Fons' wariness of the other predators hasn't really come up yet. I like Fons so much. He's the one I identify with the most.
You just brought up another issue, though: is Ward going to get pregnant in this fic? His reaction will be fun, if he does.
Waiting patiently for chapter 14...
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I need to wiggle some more Fons in there, although the sequel will have bucketloads of him :D
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