(no subject)
I had a busy day. I went to work for the first time this week. I said I had "boy's trouble". My boss gave me a double-take, looked at me a little wierdly and said he hoped I got it cleared up soon. And he gave a really shifty look at my groin. I took it that he had not got the joke. So I told Sarah about it and she thought it was funny. When he came into the office I started squirming in my chair and muttered "fucking itch". He looked at me really sympathetically and - here's the good part - he recommended me a treatment for herpes. Sarah left the room pretty quickly to go and laugh her ass off in the bathroom. I said, "it's nice to know someone's gone through the same thing". And he realised what he'd said and went all pale and left almost as quick as Sarah. Tony 2 said I was evil. Tony 1 glared at me and muttered something about immature, because he hates me. But it turned out ok, because he got his tie caught in the shredder and nobody bothered to help him.
She turned up a couple of hours later. About 10 I guess. She hadn't been to sleep at all, her hair was all over the place and she obviously hadn't changed since the day before. She was high on coke and she looked like a crack whore. But she was still beautiful, I swear. The crack-whore look suits her. Surprise surprise, drugs make her horny. Sio she dragged me to the only private place. Unfortunately, that was my boss's office. I had no idea when he'd be back and locking the door didn't offer much protection because, naturally, he has the key. But he came back about 40 minutes later. About... 10 seconds after we were fully dressed. I told him I was showing her around and Sarah gave me this "uh huh" look. Tony 2 was smirking (he seems to smirk a lot...) and Tony 1 was like "if I was bigger than you, I'd tell him the truth and get you fired". On reflection though, the boss probably would have congratulated me on my conquest... he's a real twat of a man. I think I worked out why he likes hearing about my life so much; his is so boring and bitter that to him, my life is probably like a soap opera. I think he spends his nights pouring whiskey into a glass with Top Guy written on it, looking at a picture of his mother and saying "take that mummy, I'm DRINKING WITH OUT PERMISSION" and looking really pleased with himself. Then, three drinks later, muttering to himself about his wife. Another drink and he wouldn't be muttering anymore; he'd be shaking a fist and yelling "fucking women". Then going to bed at like 9pm and coming into work the next day to ask everybody in the office what they did the night before. He's a very sad individual (notice how I said individual, because I'm politically correct?). Anyway, back to what I was saying before that disturbing tangent. I'm not sure he would have been too pleased about me using his office to ignore my work and have sex. But he won't find out so who cares?
After she left, Sarah kept giving me looks from the photocopier. Eventually I told her if she was jealous, I'd wait til he went out again and take her in his office. She didn't laugh, and she always laughs at my crap jokes, so I knew something was up. Apparently she knows Courtney. Well not really knows her, but she knows of her.She used to date Sarah's brother when she was away. He was married and his wife's having their first child sometime this month. Courtney and he had an affair for months, and when his wife found out she threw him out. So he had nowhere to live and only a small income. Sarah said he figured he'd stay with Courtney, but when he went to her house he found her with another man and she told him she was bored of him. So now the poor guy has no house, no money, no girlfriend, an absentee wife and a broken heart. That's what Courtney does. He was, understandably, pissed and hurt and confused. Courtney laughed at him for as long as she found it amusing, then when she got bored of it she applied for a restraining order and he backed off.
For a while, as horrible as it sounds, I was relieved by that story. I was thinking, at least I'm not the only one she likes to play with. But then Sarah said while Courtney and her brother were together, she wasn't a bitch to him, and it wasn't all about sex at all. She made him wait months before she slept with him, and she was never the way she is with me with him. And she didn't lose interest in him because he left his wife and she'd managed to hurt him, that wasn't her goal. She was serious about the new man she was with. Sarah didn't know too much about Courtney's relationship with the new guy, but that was serious too and he broke up with her. The break up was ugly, so Sarah says, and it's the reason she moved back here. I'm still the only guy she actively tries to hurt. The only one she has this fucked up, sexual relationship with. Joy.
So Sarah keeps giving me these worried looks, and I couldn't get her to smile the whole day. She's such a sweet person, I hate having her stressing over me. It's the same with a couple of other people as well. They get upset when I talk about her. The other day I met up with Nicole and we were catching up. She asked how it was going with Courtney and I told her about the other night when we had the fight. She just hugged me suddenly, really hard and she looked so sad. It made me feel incredibly guilty because I don't want people worrying about me. It's hard to not talk about her too, because she's all that's on my mind as of late. I'm sure pretty soon no-one is going to want to talk to me. Which is actually fine with me, honestly, because I'd rather I know for sure I'm pissing them off with my Courtney-talk than to suspect it and feel dumb everytime I talk to them.
I'd like to write a paragraph unrelated to Courtney. However that's hard, because the rest of my work day passed uneventfully, and when I got home she was there. She was sitting in my chair and Lauren and Briar both had their eyes fixed stonily on the TV, pointedly ignoring her. Courtney looked thoroughly unperplexed and actually quite amused by that. Lauren said "your friend is here" in this really stiff, disapproving voice like... 'it's none of my business, but what the fuck are you doing?'. Courtney took the opportunity to piss them off by kissing me in front of them, a lot more dramatically than was needed. She really doesn't like either of them and I don't even know why. I'm sure she doesn't give a fuck if they like her or not, it must be something else.
So we went upstairs and had hours of very great sex. I figured I'd be able to sleep afterwards, because she tires me out reallly well, but nope, she wouldn't let me sleep. She sat cross-legged at the foot of my bed, wearing only her underwear and my shirt, and went through my CDs, poking my stomach with her foot whenever she had a question. Both her incredible sexiness and the constantly being-kicked-in-the-stomach made it hard to sleep. I showed her how to work my stereo and put a pillow over my head, but she climbed on top of me and made suggestive remarks at the pillow until I gave up and sat up. She got on my computer and forced me to look at several very boring and very unfunny "amusing" e-mails (and keep in mind I had to sit on the floor because she was in the desk chair) until I started hitting my head on the floor and she got the hint. Then she sat on my lap, face to face and stared at me for like five minutes. Don't ask me what the fuck that was about, I was too busy staring at her to ask. Then she kissed me really slowly, which she hasn't done since... more or less the first night we were together. She kisses hard and fast, this was slow and kinda sensual. I don't know what the fuck she's trying to do to me, she knew that would put me just about in heaven. Then she got off me and went through my DVDs, acting like nothing had happened. It was probably one of her games... though she didn't seem to want to torture me anymore or take any joy in it. Maybe it's come to the stage where if she thinks of something to do that would be cruel, she just does it automatically. I mean, if she's going to torture me, she should at least take some pleasure in it. If not, what's the point in my pain?
We watched some TV, fooled around, made out, listened to music and actually talked. It felt like I was with a girlfriend. We didn't talk about anything serious but she never stays with me after we have sex. Unless we're at a party or we go to a party after, in which case I tag along. She wasn't even mean to me. She called a while ago and I asked why she stayed here. She said "I had nothing better to do, everyone I wanted to hang out with couldn't". Just to let me know she didn't want to be there with me, she just wanted to avoid boredom. Then, just to make 100% sure I knew what she meant she said, "don't flatter yourself, I wouldn't be hanging out with you by choice". She had a good time though (or at least, she didn't have a bad time) because she would've let me know if she wasn't.
That's about it from me. She left about 2 and 1/2 hours ago, since then I've been pining for her, naturally. Kassandra's "Get Aaron Away From Courtney" campaign means she's trying all she can to make me go to Tina's party. But it's going to be crawling with really, really annoying 15 year olds who will not leave me alone the whole night. Don't thing I'm just being an egotist, they all have annoying teenage crushes on me. Last time I was with Tina's friends, I had about 8 teenagers with really bad hooker make-up twirling strands of hair around their fingers and trying to give me "cute" expressions. They ended up looking like toddlers trying to get icecream, which really creeped me out...
HINT FOR TEENAGE GIRLS: Making someone feel like a paedophile is NOT the best way to get a date.
...eventually, I told them Darren drove a Ferrari and ran away. The next time he saw me he started manically hitting me and I couldn't fight back because I was laughing too hard. I don't even know why little girls seem to be attracted to me. Kassie thinks they want a "bad boy"... I was like, I'm not a bad boy, I'm pussy-whipped by a woman that's about 9 inches shorter than me and at least 80 lbs lighter... But one of Tina's friends apparently thinks I'm like some bad boy vampire from, guess what? Buffy the Vampire Slayer. WTF ARE THEY TRYING TO DO TO ME? I have groupies. It's wrong wrong and bad. Anyway, another friend disagreed and thinks I'm more like Angel. Why do they think I'm a fucking vampire?! Somebody help me here.
So yeah, not going to that party. I suppose the rest of my night will be spent not sleeping and listening to the CD that Courtney put on repeat for the whole time we had sex:
Sex
On Top of Me
More and More
In Those Jeans
Can U Handle It
In the Air Tonight
I Don't Wanna Know
I'll Do Anything, I'm Sorry
Sugar Water
Goodies
Put It In My Mouth
And lastly, the one that, each time it came on I thought the title was more appropriate than even "Sex": 'Where is my Mind'. I kinda came to me each time I heard that phrase, what the fuck was I doing? I was having sex with a woman that I hate who doesn't even like me. I should never play music when I have sex. Every song that's ever been on when I had sex I now associate with that person or that experience. It's not always a good thing. There are some of my favourite songs in that list and now all they mean is Courtney.
Now I will go and pine.
Adios.
She turned up a couple of hours later. About 10 I guess. She hadn't been to sleep at all, her hair was all over the place and she obviously hadn't changed since the day before. She was high on coke and she looked like a crack whore. But she was still beautiful, I swear. The crack-whore look suits her. Surprise surprise, drugs make her horny. Sio she dragged me to the only private place. Unfortunately, that was my boss's office. I had no idea when he'd be back and locking the door didn't offer much protection because, naturally, he has the key. But he came back about 40 minutes later. About... 10 seconds after we were fully dressed. I told him I was showing her around and Sarah gave me this "uh huh" look. Tony 2 was smirking (he seems to smirk a lot...) and Tony 1 was like "if I was bigger than you, I'd tell him the truth and get you fired". On reflection though, the boss probably would have congratulated me on my conquest... he's a real twat of a man. I think I worked out why he likes hearing about my life so much; his is so boring and bitter that to him, my life is probably like a soap opera. I think he spends his nights pouring whiskey into a glass with Top Guy written on it, looking at a picture of his mother and saying "take that mummy, I'm DRINKING WITH OUT PERMISSION" and looking really pleased with himself. Then, three drinks later, muttering to himself about his wife. Another drink and he wouldn't be muttering anymore; he'd be shaking a fist and yelling "fucking women". Then going to bed at like 9pm and coming into work the next day to ask everybody in the office what they did the night before. He's a very sad individual (notice how I said individual, because I'm politically correct?). Anyway, back to what I was saying before that disturbing tangent. I'm not sure he would have been too pleased about me using his office to ignore my work and have sex. But he won't find out so who cares?
After she left, Sarah kept giving me looks from the photocopier. Eventually I told her if she was jealous, I'd wait til he went out again and take her in his office. She didn't laugh, and she always laughs at my crap jokes, so I knew something was up. Apparently she knows Courtney. Well not really knows her, but she knows of her.She used to date Sarah's brother when she was away. He was married and his wife's having their first child sometime this month. Courtney and he had an affair for months, and when his wife found out she threw him out. So he had nowhere to live and only a small income. Sarah said he figured he'd stay with Courtney, but when he went to her house he found her with another man and she told him she was bored of him. So now the poor guy has no house, no money, no girlfriend, an absentee wife and a broken heart. That's what Courtney does. He was, understandably, pissed and hurt and confused. Courtney laughed at him for as long as she found it amusing, then when she got bored of it she applied for a restraining order and he backed off.
For a while, as horrible as it sounds, I was relieved by that story. I was thinking, at least I'm not the only one she likes to play with. But then Sarah said while Courtney and her brother were together, she wasn't a bitch to him, and it wasn't all about sex at all. She made him wait months before she slept with him, and she was never the way she is with me with him. And she didn't lose interest in him because he left his wife and she'd managed to hurt him, that wasn't her goal. She was serious about the new man she was with. Sarah didn't know too much about Courtney's relationship with the new guy, but that was serious too and he broke up with her. The break up was ugly, so Sarah says, and it's the reason she moved back here. I'm still the only guy she actively tries to hurt. The only one she has this fucked up, sexual relationship with. Joy.
So Sarah keeps giving me these worried looks, and I couldn't get her to smile the whole day. She's such a sweet person, I hate having her stressing over me. It's the same with a couple of other people as well. They get upset when I talk about her. The other day I met up with Nicole and we were catching up. She asked how it was going with Courtney and I told her about the other night when we had the fight. She just hugged me suddenly, really hard and she looked so sad. It made me feel incredibly guilty because I don't want people worrying about me. It's hard to not talk about her too, because she's all that's on my mind as of late. I'm sure pretty soon no-one is going to want to talk to me. Which is actually fine with me, honestly, because I'd rather I know for sure I'm pissing them off with my Courtney-talk than to suspect it and feel dumb everytime I talk to them.
I'd like to write a paragraph unrelated to Courtney. However that's hard, because the rest of my work day passed uneventfully, and when I got home she was there. She was sitting in my chair and Lauren and Briar both had their eyes fixed stonily on the TV, pointedly ignoring her. Courtney looked thoroughly unperplexed and actually quite amused by that. Lauren said "your friend is here" in this really stiff, disapproving voice like... 'it's none of my business, but what the fuck are you doing?'. Courtney took the opportunity to piss them off by kissing me in front of them, a lot more dramatically than was needed. She really doesn't like either of them and I don't even know why. I'm sure she doesn't give a fuck if they like her or not, it must be something else.
So we went upstairs and had hours of very great sex. I figured I'd be able to sleep afterwards, because she tires me out reallly well, but nope, she wouldn't let me sleep. She sat cross-legged at the foot of my bed, wearing only her underwear and my shirt, and went through my CDs, poking my stomach with her foot whenever she had a question. Both her incredible sexiness and the constantly being-kicked-in-the-stomach made it hard to sleep. I showed her how to work my stereo and put a pillow over my head, but she climbed on top of me and made suggestive remarks at the pillow until I gave up and sat up. She got on my computer and forced me to look at several very boring and very unfunny "amusing" e-mails (and keep in mind I had to sit on the floor because she was in the desk chair) until I started hitting my head on the floor and she got the hint. Then she sat on my lap, face to face and stared at me for like five minutes. Don't ask me what the fuck that was about, I was too busy staring at her to ask. Then she kissed me really slowly, which she hasn't done since... more or less the first night we were together. She kisses hard and fast, this was slow and kinda sensual. I don't know what the fuck she's trying to do to me, she knew that would put me just about in heaven. Then she got off me and went through my DVDs, acting like nothing had happened. It was probably one of her games... though she didn't seem to want to torture me anymore or take any joy in it. Maybe it's come to the stage where if she thinks of something to do that would be cruel, she just does it automatically. I mean, if she's going to torture me, she should at least take some pleasure in it. If not, what's the point in my pain?
We watched some TV, fooled around, made out, listened to music and actually talked. It felt like I was with a girlfriend. We didn't talk about anything serious but she never stays with me after we have sex. Unless we're at a party or we go to a party after, in which case I tag along. She wasn't even mean to me. She called a while ago and I asked why she stayed here. She said "I had nothing better to do, everyone I wanted to hang out with couldn't". Just to let me know she didn't want to be there with me, she just wanted to avoid boredom. Then, just to make 100% sure I knew what she meant she said, "don't flatter yourself, I wouldn't be hanging out with you by choice". She had a good time though (or at least, she didn't have a bad time) because she would've let me know if she wasn't.
That's about it from me. She left about 2 and 1/2 hours ago, since then I've been pining for her, naturally. Kassandra's "Get Aaron Away From Courtney" campaign means she's trying all she can to make me go to Tina's party. But it's going to be crawling with really, really annoying 15 year olds who will not leave me alone the whole night. Don't thing I'm just being an egotist, they all have annoying teenage crushes on me. Last time I was with Tina's friends, I had about 8 teenagers with really bad hooker make-up twirling strands of hair around their fingers and trying to give me "cute" expressions. They ended up looking like toddlers trying to get icecream, which really creeped me out...
HINT FOR TEENAGE GIRLS: Making someone feel like a paedophile is NOT the best way to get a date.
...eventually, I told them Darren drove a Ferrari and ran away. The next time he saw me he started manically hitting me and I couldn't fight back because I was laughing too hard. I don't even know why little girls seem to be attracted to me. Kassie thinks they want a "bad boy"... I was like, I'm not a bad boy, I'm pussy-whipped by a woman that's about 9 inches shorter than me and at least 80 lbs lighter... But one of Tina's friends apparently thinks I'm like some bad boy vampire from, guess what? Buffy the Vampire Slayer. WTF ARE THEY TRYING TO DO TO ME? I have groupies. It's wrong wrong and bad. Anyway, another friend disagreed and thinks I'm more like Angel. Why do they think I'm a fucking vampire?! Somebody help me here.
So yeah, not going to that party. I suppose the rest of my night will be spent not sleeping and listening to the CD that Courtney put on repeat for the whole time we had sex:
Sex
On Top of Me
More and More
In Those Jeans
Can U Handle It
In the Air Tonight
I Don't Wanna Know
I'll Do Anything, I'm Sorry
Sugar Water
Goodies
Put It In My Mouth
And lastly, the one that, each time it came on I thought the title was more appropriate than even "Sex": 'Where is my Mind'. I kinda came to me each time I heard that phrase, what the fuck was I doing? I was having sex with a woman that I hate who doesn't even like me. I should never play music when I have sex. Every song that's ever been on when I had sex I now associate with that person or that experience. It's not always a good thing. There are some of my favourite songs in that list and now all they mean is Courtney.
Now I will go and pine.
Adios.