Fanfic: Slow Me Down (4/?)
Title: Slow Me Down (4/?)
Author: elpmas03
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Callie/Arizona, other various characters
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
Summary: SEQUEL TO BATTLEFIELD. It wouldn’t be a good fic without some angst, now would it?
Callie
“She knows,” I declare, walking through the door of Mark and Lexie’s apartment as soon as he opens it.
“About us?” Mark jokes without hesitating.
I wait for him to finish the little dance he’s doing and get over how “funny” he is before I sigh in frustration at the fact that he’s making a joke out of this. Okay, so maybe he doesn’t really know what I’m talking about exactly, but the look on my face should tell him I’m not in a joking mood.
“What does she know?” he asks, giving me an apologetic look and shutting the door before he walks toward the couch I’m sitting on.
“The ring. She knows about the ring and the proposal and everything,” I explain.
“What do you mean she knows? How can she know? And how do you know she knows?” he questions me in succession without taking a breath.
It makes me feel a little better that he’s panicking almost as much as I am right now.
“I specifically remember putting the box in the cover of my pillow that one night that she walked in when I was looking at it,” I tell him. “And when I woke up the other morning it was under my entire pillow, now in the cover.”
“Maybe you’re just making this up in your head,” Mark offers, but I quickly shake my head.
“No, I remember exactly putting it in the cover,” I whine. “Mark, what am I going to do? I had a whole image of it happening and now it’s going to be ruined because I’m an idiot and forgot to put it back in my closet.”
He looks at me in astonishment as I ramble quickly, smashing my words together so they’re barely words at all.
“Just, calm down okay? I would prefer not having to take you to the hospital on my day off because you passed out,” he jokes, causing me to laugh lightly and breathe correctly.
“What should I do?” I beg him for advice.
“Well…” he hums, sitting back on the couch to think about the answer. “I guess, if it was me…I would wait a while. Just hold off for a bit and maybe get her thinking you’re not going to do it and then BAM-“
I jump a little when he yells the last word like he’s Emerald.
“You hit her with the proposal,” he finishes with a proud look at his advice.
“You think?” I confirm with him.
“Yes, look, I know I’m not the best with the advice thing, but you want this to be a surprise, right?”
I nod quickly.
“Okay, then just wait a little while longer than you had planned and let her think it’s not going to happen,” he replies, lifting his hands at his own brilliance.
I can’t believe I’m going with Mark’s advice, but it’s the only option I can think of right now. I can’t do it now…I’m not prepared or ready emotionally to do it and I don’t want to rush this. So, I will wait. Because I want this to be perfect.
*********************************************************************************************
Arizona
It’s been three weeks since I found the ring in Callie’s pillow and I’m fairly confident she doesn’t know I saw it. I think she was too distracted by the red lace I was wearing to notice my hands fumbling beneath the covers to hide the box. No, I’m pretty sure she doesn’t know…however, something else has been worrying me.
She seems to be different lately, like every time anyone starts discussing the upcoming wedding or anything to do with marriage, she finds a way to quickly change the subject or completely ignores the conversation in general. Her quick dismissal of anything marriage is making me question what I really saw. I didn’t actually see the ring; I just assumed that’s what it was. The next day I snuck into her room again while she was borrowing some wine from Mark across the hall, but the box wasn’t there anymore. I was actually somewhat relieved because to be honest…if it is a ring…I don’t want to ruin the surprise by peaking too soon.
“I mean if she’s going to do it, what is she waiting for?” I ask Teddy who’s sitting across from me in the cafeteria, munching on a handful of pretzels.
I feel very thankful in times like these to have someone to talk to so openly and Teddy has been that person for the last two years. Callie has her man-whore and now I have Teddy.
“I don’t know, maybe she’s just waiting for the right moment,” she replies, giving me an apologetic smile for not having a better answer.
“But why would it be under her pillow of all places? Did she not expect me to find it there? I mean I’m a little blind sometimes, but I’m not stupid,” I continue to rant pushing spoonfuls of yogurt into my mouth between sentences. “What if she changed her mind?”
I can see Teddy look up from her magazine quickly when she hears the sadness and disappointment in my question and her immediate response is to offer me the donut she hasn’t touched yet.
“She didn’t change her mind,” she reassures me as I thankfully take the powdered piece of heaven from her. “You just have to be patient.”
I nod to tell her I’ll try my best, but I know that it won’t work. I’m normally a very patient person…I work with kids for God’s sake, but not when it comes to something like this. I know my mind is going to be flooded with questions like these until she finally does it and the only thing I can do right now is gulp down the remainder of the donut and get back to work to try and take my mind off of this whole thing.
*********************************************************************************************
Callie
“I’ll raise you five,” I offer Owen, sliding a blue chip into the center of the table and sitting back to try and look confident in the awful cards I’m holding.
He meets my bet and waits for me to show him my cards. When he sees I have nothing and lays down his full house, Christina quickly starts to gloat, pulling the chip pile towards her.
“Uh, you didn’t win, buddy,” I inform her, taking another sip of my beer while Arizona gives me a pat on the leg in sympathy.
“Uh, well as soon as we’re married this will be going right into our bank account, so yeah, I did win…buddy,” she shoots back, giving me a triumphant grin.
I just roll my eyes in response-not just because she’s gloating like crazy about winning, but because she’s bragging about the huge, shiny, diamond ring on her hand. Is there something in the water that’s making everyone propose or something? I feel surprisingly angry and annoyed that everyone is stealing my thunder and I know Arizona can tell I’m slightly upset when she removes her hand from where it’s resting on my knee and gets up to get more to drink.
“Anyone want another one?” she asks.
Mark, Lexie, Owen, and I all give her a ‘yes’ while Christina continues to count the chips in front of her even though she knows she’s already winning. More precisely…Owen is already winning.
“I can’t believe we’re both getting married soon!” Lexie squeals in excitement while I deal the next hand. “We can plan together!”
Christina gives a nervous smile before grabbing the cards I’m throwing to her and taking the beer Arizona is handing her.
“I could help you with stuff, you know. Like dresses and flowers and music-oh! You should do a live band, not a DJ, they’re kind of-“
“Okay!” I blurt out, causing Lexie to jump and everyone to give me a surprised look. “We get it; you’re getting married and all that, yay! Can we please finish?”
“Calliope-“
“No, okay, I just,” I let out a long exhale before I continue to whine like a 5-year-old. “I’m sick of hearing about weddings and…everything. I’m just…I just want to play poker.”
I instantly feel bad for snapping at her, but I’m so sick of hearing about marriage and proposals and blah, blah, blah! I’m too frustrated since I can’t carry out my own plan and have to watch everyone else get their happy ending instead. Maybe taking advice from Mark was a bad idea after all. I don’t look anyone in the eyes once I’m done talking; instead I stare straight at my hand and wait for Mark to make the first bet. I can see Arizona staring at her cards blankly out of the corner of my eye and I take another large gulp of alcohol to try and calm myself.
Mark’s bet is interrupted by the door to his apartment opening and Derek and Meredith walking in.
“Christina, I just saw the perfect dress for you,” Meredith informs her best friend rather unemotionally-so Meredith.
I let my head fall back and sigh in frustration at the interruption, but I shoot it back up again when I hear someone slam their hand on the table with their cards.
“What is your problem?” Arizona yells, turning to face me straight on and look me in the eyes.
I’ve rarely seen her this angry before and I know right away that she’s preparing for a fight.
“I-“
“You hate the idea of marriage so much that you feel the need to bring them down for having that?” she cuts me off, her face turning bright red in anger and frustration.
When I continue to sit there stunned into silence, she huffs in anger and grabs her jacket that’s laying across the back of her chair before standing up to put it on.
“Arizo-“
“No! Don’t, just…don’t,” she snaps at me, pulling her jacket on and slamming the door on her way out.
I hang my head in defeat before looking up to see everyone staring at random objects around the room awkwardly.
“So,” Christina begins, breaking the silence. “Who gets her chips then?”
I groan in frustration before standing up, tossing my chips at her, and storming out to get to my apartment as quickly as possible.
*********************************************************************************************
Arizona
I can’t remember the last time I slept in my apartment. Even on nights when Callie has to work, I always end up sleeping at her place anyway. Something about the smell of her in the room and the way my body seems to be molded into the mattress comforts me. Now, though, as I lie here in my cold, slightly hard bed, I wish I had spent more nights here so that I wouldn’t feel so alone right now.
I can’t believe I yelled at her like that in front of anyone. I’ve never been one to be afraid to argue with Callie before because to be honest, I like when we vent at each other sometimes. It feels healthy and I know she’s the only one who will take it and still be around later when it’s all over. But, I’ve always refused to be one of those people who scream at their girlfriend in front of their friends, until tonight of course. Something about the way she snapped at Lexie and Christina and her frustration with Meredith’s comment made me snap.
If she’s so against marriage then why the hell does she have a ring? Why the hell are we even together if she doesn’t plan on getting to that point sometime in the future? I’ve never really seriously considered marriage until I met her, but it’s still always been in the back of my mind that someday I’ll get to that point with someone. I mean, I am a woman after all.
My thoughts are broken by the sound of my apartment door opening and I instantly regret not putting the chain up. I stay still, facing the wall opposite of my bedroom door, and wait for her to burst in. When she does, I pretend to not even notice her sudden appearance and instead keep trying to fall asleep.
She stands there in silence for a few minutes while she tries to decide how to say what she wants to.
“I don’t hate marriage; in fact I happen to love the idea of marriage. Hello, divorcee here!” she shouts at me and I instantly bolt upright and feel the anger spew out of my mouth.
“Really? Then why are you freaking out all of a sudden? Acting like you’d rather get hit by a car than get married?”
She looks at me in amazement before slamming the door and pacing to the end of my bed.
“I’m freaking out?” she yells again. “What about you? You’ve been walking around like a zombie the past few days since Christina and Owen got engaged.”
I know she’s referring to the way I’ve been unable to focus every time they’re around. I can’t help but be jealous by the fact that they’re engaged and I’m still waiting around for Callie to get off her ass and give me the ring. What the hell is she waiting for?
“I-“
“No, you know what?” she asks, cutting me off. “I’m not going to stand here and defend myself when I shouldn’t have to. If you don’t want to get married, just tell me now so I’m not wasting my time.”
“Of course I want to get married! Why the hell else would I be screaming at you right now!” I yell back, stunned that she would even accuse me of that and give me an ultimatum in the same breath.
“Well you have a weird way of showing it!” she retorts.
No matter how mad I am at her right now, I can’t bring myself to tell her I know about the ring. I don’t want to ruin her plan…if there even still is a plan after the way we’ve both been acting. She scoffs in frustration at my silence, taking it as my way of saying that I’m done fighting for this.
“Well, when you make your decision just make sure to give me a heads up,” she mumbles angrily before turning to leave the room.
“Callie,” I exhale her name, hoping the surrender in my voice will get her to listen to me.
She hesitates briefly, but grabs the door after a second and walks out, slamming the apartment door a few steps later.
*********************************************************************************************
Callie
I hate sleeping alone, especially when it’s by choice. The loneliness I feel is causing me to lie awake at night, not getting any form of sleep whatsoever. If I wasn’t so stubborn I’d probably give in and go talk to her just to get some decent rest. I can feel my eyes drifting shut while I sit at the table in the cafeteria next to Mark and Owen. I know they’re watching me carefully, ready to catch me when I start to slide to the ground in exhaustion, but I don’t care. I’m just so tired. Tired physically and emotionally because I haven’t been able to feel anything but anger and frustration the past couple of days. We were supposed to be engaged by now, planning our future together, and instead we haven’t spoken to each other since the fight during poker night.
“Callie,” Mark mumbles when I start to slip off of my chair.
I shoot my eyes open at the sound of my name and yawn as I open the bag of veggies on my tray.
“Are you okay?” Owen asks, concern in his voice. “You look pretty tired.”
“I can’t sleep,” I tell him, adjusting my position to get more comfortable while I chomp on a few carrots.
“Why don’t you talk to her?” Mark suggests and I can tell it’s partly in concern for my health at this point.
“I don’t want to talk to her, I want to propose to her,” I groan, shifting my body again to cross my legs and lay back in my chair.
“Then propose to her,” Owen tells me.
The way he says it makes it sound like it’s such an obvious solution and I take him seriously for the first time since we started eating.
“I can’t propose to her, we’re fighting,” I say, shooting down his idea.
“Who cares?” he pipes up, his voice rising a few octaves. “Do you love her?”
“Of course I do-” I answer him, but he shoots another question at me.
“Are you ready to marry her?”
“Yes, but-“
“No but’s, Torres, there’s nothing more to worry about,” he tells me.
“What if she says no?” I whisper.
The thought of her saying no never even crossed my mind until after we fought and it sounds awkward when I ask the question.
“Callie,” Mark cuts in, looking at me like I just asked what the capital of the U.S. is. “She’s not going to say no. She loves you. And no matter how much you push her she’s not going to go away.”
I know he’s right, but I’m still unsure about all of this. How can I ask her to marry me when the last time I talked to her I yelled at her for not caring enough to deserve a proposal? If I’m going to do this I have to come up with something even more meaningful than what I already had planned. How the hell am I going to do that?
“Callie?” Mark interrupts me from staring at the table.
“I’m going to do it,” I tell them both, the idea suddenly coming to me.
“Really? That little pep talk actually worked?” he asks in amazement.
“What?” I squeak. “You mean you didn’t mean it?”
“We meant it,” Owen reassures me before throwing Mark a threatening glare. “What are you going to do?”
He asks me the last part as I stand up and pick up my tray to leave.
“Enlist a little help,” I answer him, turning on my heels and walking confidently toward the door.
Author: elpmas03
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Callie/Arizona, other various characters
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
Summary: SEQUEL TO BATTLEFIELD. It wouldn’t be a good fic without some angst, now would it?
Callie
“She knows,” I declare, walking through the door of Mark and Lexie’s apartment as soon as he opens it.
“About us?” Mark jokes without hesitating.
I wait for him to finish the little dance he’s doing and get over how “funny” he is before I sigh in frustration at the fact that he’s making a joke out of this. Okay, so maybe he doesn’t really know what I’m talking about exactly, but the look on my face should tell him I’m not in a joking mood.
“What does she know?” he asks, giving me an apologetic look and shutting the door before he walks toward the couch I’m sitting on.
“The ring. She knows about the ring and the proposal and everything,” I explain.
“What do you mean she knows? How can she know? And how do you know she knows?” he questions me in succession without taking a breath.
It makes me feel a little better that he’s panicking almost as much as I am right now.
“I specifically remember putting the box in the cover of my pillow that one night that she walked in when I was looking at it,” I tell him. “And when I woke up the other morning it was under my entire pillow, now in the cover.”
“Maybe you’re just making this up in your head,” Mark offers, but I quickly shake my head.
“No, I remember exactly putting it in the cover,” I whine. “Mark, what am I going to do? I had a whole image of it happening and now it’s going to be ruined because I’m an idiot and forgot to put it back in my closet.”
He looks at me in astonishment as I ramble quickly, smashing my words together so they’re barely words at all.
“Just, calm down okay? I would prefer not having to take you to the hospital on my day off because you passed out,” he jokes, causing me to laugh lightly and breathe correctly.
“What should I do?” I beg him for advice.
“Well…” he hums, sitting back on the couch to think about the answer. “I guess, if it was me…I would wait a while. Just hold off for a bit and maybe get her thinking you’re not going to do it and then BAM-“
I jump a little when he yells the last word like he’s Emerald.
“You hit her with the proposal,” he finishes with a proud look at his advice.
“You think?” I confirm with him.
“Yes, look, I know I’m not the best with the advice thing, but you want this to be a surprise, right?”
I nod quickly.
“Okay, then just wait a little while longer than you had planned and let her think it’s not going to happen,” he replies, lifting his hands at his own brilliance.
I can’t believe I’m going with Mark’s advice, but it’s the only option I can think of right now. I can’t do it now…I’m not prepared or ready emotionally to do it and I don’t want to rush this. So, I will wait. Because I want this to be perfect.
*********************************************************************************************
Arizona
It’s been three weeks since I found the ring in Callie’s pillow and I’m fairly confident she doesn’t know I saw it. I think she was too distracted by the red lace I was wearing to notice my hands fumbling beneath the covers to hide the box. No, I’m pretty sure she doesn’t know…however, something else has been worrying me.
She seems to be different lately, like every time anyone starts discussing the upcoming wedding or anything to do with marriage, she finds a way to quickly change the subject or completely ignores the conversation in general. Her quick dismissal of anything marriage is making me question what I really saw. I didn’t actually see the ring; I just assumed that’s what it was. The next day I snuck into her room again while she was borrowing some wine from Mark across the hall, but the box wasn’t there anymore. I was actually somewhat relieved because to be honest…if it is a ring…I don’t want to ruin the surprise by peaking too soon.
“I mean if she’s going to do it, what is she waiting for?” I ask Teddy who’s sitting across from me in the cafeteria, munching on a handful of pretzels.
I feel very thankful in times like these to have someone to talk to so openly and Teddy has been that person for the last two years. Callie has her man-whore and now I have Teddy.
“I don’t know, maybe she’s just waiting for the right moment,” she replies, giving me an apologetic smile for not having a better answer.
“But why would it be under her pillow of all places? Did she not expect me to find it there? I mean I’m a little blind sometimes, but I’m not stupid,” I continue to rant pushing spoonfuls of yogurt into my mouth between sentences. “What if she changed her mind?”
I can see Teddy look up from her magazine quickly when she hears the sadness and disappointment in my question and her immediate response is to offer me the donut she hasn’t touched yet.
“She didn’t change her mind,” she reassures me as I thankfully take the powdered piece of heaven from her. “You just have to be patient.”
I nod to tell her I’ll try my best, but I know that it won’t work. I’m normally a very patient person…I work with kids for God’s sake, but not when it comes to something like this. I know my mind is going to be flooded with questions like these until she finally does it and the only thing I can do right now is gulp down the remainder of the donut and get back to work to try and take my mind off of this whole thing.
*********************************************************************************************
Callie
“I’ll raise you five,” I offer Owen, sliding a blue chip into the center of the table and sitting back to try and look confident in the awful cards I’m holding.
He meets my bet and waits for me to show him my cards. When he sees I have nothing and lays down his full house, Christina quickly starts to gloat, pulling the chip pile towards her.
“Uh, you didn’t win, buddy,” I inform her, taking another sip of my beer while Arizona gives me a pat on the leg in sympathy.
“Uh, well as soon as we’re married this will be going right into our bank account, so yeah, I did win…buddy,” she shoots back, giving me a triumphant grin.
I just roll my eyes in response-not just because she’s gloating like crazy about winning, but because she’s bragging about the huge, shiny, diamond ring on her hand. Is there something in the water that’s making everyone propose or something? I feel surprisingly angry and annoyed that everyone is stealing my thunder and I know Arizona can tell I’m slightly upset when she removes her hand from where it’s resting on my knee and gets up to get more to drink.
“Anyone want another one?” she asks.
Mark, Lexie, Owen, and I all give her a ‘yes’ while Christina continues to count the chips in front of her even though she knows she’s already winning. More precisely…Owen is already winning.
“I can’t believe we’re both getting married soon!” Lexie squeals in excitement while I deal the next hand. “We can plan together!”
Christina gives a nervous smile before grabbing the cards I’m throwing to her and taking the beer Arizona is handing her.
“I could help you with stuff, you know. Like dresses and flowers and music-oh! You should do a live band, not a DJ, they’re kind of-“
“Okay!” I blurt out, causing Lexie to jump and everyone to give me a surprised look. “We get it; you’re getting married and all that, yay! Can we please finish?”
“Calliope-“
“No, okay, I just,” I let out a long exhale before I continue to whine like a 5-year-old. “I’m sick of hearing about weddings and…everything. I’m just…I just want to play poker.”
I instantly feel bad for snapping at her, but I’m so sick of hearing about marriage and proposals and blah, blah, blah! I’m too frustrated since I can’t carry out my own plan and have to watch everyone else get their happy ending instead. Maybe taking advice from Mark was a bad idea after all. I don’t look anyone in the eyes once I’m done talking; instead I stare straight at my hand and wait for Mark to make the first bet. I can see Arizona staring at her cards blankly out of the corner of my eye and I take another large gulp of alcohol to try and calm myself.
Mark’s bet is interrupted by the door to his apartment opening and Derek and Meredith walking in.
“Christina, I just saw the perfect dress for you,” Meredith informs her best friend rather unemotionally-so Meredith.
I let my head fall back and sigh in frustration at the interruption, but I shoot it back up again when I hear someone slam their hand on the table with their cards.
“What is your problem?” Arizona yells, turning to face me straight on and look me in the eyes.
I’ve rarely seen her this angry before and I know right away that she’s preparing for a fight.
“I-“
“You hate the idea of marriage so much that you feel the need to bring them down for having that?” she cuts me off, her face turning bright red in anger and frustration.
When I continue to sit there stunned into silence, she huffs in anger and grabs her jacket that’s laying across the back of her chair before standing up to put it on.
“Arizo-“
“No! Don’t, just…don’t,” she snaps at me, pulling her jacket on and slamming the door on her way out.
I hang my head in defeat before looking up to see everyone staring at random objects around the room awkwardly.
“So,” Christina begins, breaking the silence. “Who gets her chips then?”
I groan in frustration before standing up, tossing my chips at her, and storming out to get to my apartment as quickly as possible.
*********************************************************************************************
Arizona
I can’t remember the last time I slept in my apartment. Even on nights when Callie has to work, I always end up sleeping at her place anyway. Something about the smell of her in the room and the way my body seems to be molded into the mattress comforts me. Now, though, as I lie here in my cold, slightly hard bed, I wish I had spent more nights here so that I wouldn’t feel so alone right now.
I can’t believe I yelled at her like that in front of anyone. I’ve never been one to be afraid to argue with Callie before because to be honest, I like when we vent at each other sometimes. It feels healthy and I know she’s the only one who will take it and still be around later when it’s all over. But, I’ve always refused to be one of those people who scream at their girlfriend in front of their friends, until tonight of course. Something about the way she snapped at Lexie and Christina and her frustration with Meredith’s comment made me snap.
If she’s so against marriage then why the hell does she have a ring? Why the hell are we even together if she doesn’t plan on getting to that point sometime in the future? I’ve never really seriously considered marriage until I met her, but it’s still always been in the back of my mind that someday I’ll get to that point with someone. I mean, I am a woman after all.
My thoughts are broken by the sound of my apartment door opening and I instantly regret not putting the chain up. I stay still, facing the wall opposite of my bedroom door, and wait for her to burst in. When she does, I pretend to not even notice her sudden appearance and instead keep trying to fall asleep.
She stands there in silence for a few minutes while she tries to decide how to say what she wants to.
“I don’t hate marriage; in fact I happen to love the idea of marriage. Hello, divorcee here!” she shouts at me and I instantly bolt upright and feel the anger spew out of my mouth.
“Really? Then why are you freaking out all of a sudden? Acting like you’d rather get hit by a car than get married?”
She looks at me in amazement before slamming the door and pacing to the end of my bed.
“I’m freaking out?” she yells again. “What about you? You’ve been walking around like a zombie the past few days since Christina and Owen got engaged.”
I know she’s referring to the way I’ve been unable to focus every time they’re around. I can’t help but be jealous by the fact that they’re engaged and I’m still waiting around for Callie to get off her ass and give me the ring. What the hell is she waiting for?
“I-“
“No, you know what?” she asks, cutting me off. “I’m not going to stand here and defend myself when I shouldn’t have to. If you don’t want to get married, just tell me now so I’m not wasting my time.”
“Of course I want to get married! Why the hell else would I be screaming at you right now!” I yell back, stunned that she would even accuse me of that and give me an ultimatum in the same breath.
“Well you have a weird way of showing it!” she retorts.
No matter how mad I am at her right now, I can’t bring myself to tell her I know about the ring. I don’t want to ruin her plan…if there even still is a plan after the way we’ve both been acting. She scoffs in frustration at my silence, taking it as my way of saying that I’m done fighting for this.
“Well, when you make your decision just make sure to give me a heads up,” she mumbles angrily before turning to leave the room.
“Callie,” I exhale her name, hoping the surrender in my voice will get her to listen to me.
She hesitates briefly, but grabs the door after a second and walks out, slamming the apartment door a few steps later.
*********************************************************************************************
Callie
I hate sleeping alone, especially when it’s by choice. The loneliness I feel is causing me to lie awake at night, not getting any form of sleep whatsoever. If I wasn’t so stubborn I’d probably give in and go talk to her just to get some decent rest. I can feel my eyes drifting shut while I sit at the table in the cafeteria next to Mark and Owen. I know they’re watching me carefully, ready to catch me when I start to slide to the ground in exhaustion, but I don’t care. I’m just so tired. Tired physically and emotionally because I haven’t been able to feel anything but anger and frustration the past couple of days. We were supposed to be engaged by now, planning our future together, and instead we haven’t spoken to each other since the fight during poker night.
“Callie,” Mark mumbles when I start to slip off of my chair.
I shoot my eyes open at the sound of my name and yawn as I open the bag of veggies on my tray.
“Are you okay?” Owen asks, concern in his voice. “You look pretty tired.”
“I can’t sleep,” I tell him, adjusting my position to get more comfortable while I chomp on a few carrots.
“Why don’t you talk to her?” Mark suggests and I can tell it’s partly in concern for my health at this point.
“I don’t want to talk to her, I want to propose to her,” I groan, shifting my body again to cross my legs and lay back in my chair.
“Then propose to her,” Owen tells me.
The way he says it makes it sound like it’s such an obvious solution and I take him seriously for the first time since we started eating.
“I can’t propose to her, we’re fighting,” I say, shooting down his idea.
“Who cares?” he pipes up, his voice rising a few octaves. “Do you love her?”
“Of course I do-” I answer him, but he shoots another question at me.
“Are you ready to marry her?”
“Yes, but-“
“No but’s, Torres, there’s nothing more to worry about,” he tells me.
“What if she says no?” I whisper.
The thought of her saying no never even crossed my mind until after we fought and it sounds awkward when I ask the question.
“Callie,” Mark cuts in, looking at me like I just asked what the capital of the U.S. is. “She’s not going to say no. She loves you. And no matter how much you push her she’s not going to go away.”
I know he’s right, but I’m still unsure about all of this. How can I ask her to marry me when the last time I talked to her I yelled at her for not caring enough to deserve a proposal? If I’m going to do this I have to come up with something even more meaningful than what I already had planned. How the hell am I going to do that?
“Callie?” Mark interrupts me from staring at the table.
“I’m going to do it,” I tell them both, the idea suddenly coming to me.
“Really? That little pep talk actually worked?” he asks in amazement.
“What?” I squeak. “You mean you didn’t mean it?”
“We meant it,” Owen reassures me before throwing Mark a threatening glare. “What are you going to do?”
He asks me the last part as I stand up and pick up my tray to leave.
“Enlist a little help,” I answer him, turning on my heels and walking confidently toward the door.