(no subject)
Im proud of myself
im still at it
tho most, if not all, the entries are private
i continue to write
writing is my only vice left
no more drugs... not for now at least...
but here- maybe this will light your fire:
HUNTER S. THOMPSON....
There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die.
I believe that with the advent of acid, we discovered a new way to think, and it has to do with piecing together new thoughts in your mind. Why is it that people think it's so evil? What is it about it that scares people so deeply, even the guy that invented it, what is it? Because they're afraid that there's more to reality than they have confronted. That there are doors that they're afraid to go in, and they don't want us to go in there either, because if we go in we might learn something that they don't know. And that makes us a little out of their control.
San Francisco in the middle was a very special time and place to be a part of…But no explanation, no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that corner of time and the world. Whatever it meant…There was madness in any direction, at any hour…You could strike sparks anywhere. There was a fantastic universal sense that whatever we were doing was right, that we were winning…. And that, I think, was the handle-that sense of inevitable victory over the forces of Old and Evil. Not in any mean or military sense; we didn’t need that. Our energy would simply prevail. There was no point in fighting-on our side or theirs. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave….So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look West, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark-that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back.
In a closed society where everybody’s guilty, the only crime is getting caught. In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity.
to try to define men is often futile. men’s emotions are very rarely put into words successfully.
Most people’s lives are virtual monuments to cowardly indecision. Ah, that we lack the courage of our romantic convictions; and thereby miss the wine of life, forgoing the very thing that makes living worthwhile.
Everybody is looking for someone who can stand up in the wind. It is lonely standing up and crowded lying down. I refuse to be an anchor for other people’s dreams - but then I refuse to anchor mine to anyone else. So I have no choice but to stand up and piss into the wind.
drugs. well I took them and it was quite a ride. I went completely out of my head and I had a wonderful time, didn’t bother a soul. Not a hint of violence.but for some reason people had a problem with it... hmm...
We are always acting on what has just finished happening. It happened at least 1/30th of a second ago. We think we’re in the present, but we aren’t. The present we know is only a movie of the past.
b: This is just shit. It's happening. No blame. Happening and on the rise it would appear. What can we do to delay it? Probably zilch. To stop it? Likely less. But to survive it? Now that sounds more promising. There is evidence of bad shit having been survived before. Ancient Advice Left in cave by Wise French Caveman: "When Bigbad Shit come, no run scream hide. Try paint picture of it on wall. Drum to it. Sing to it. Dance to it. This give you handle on it." So Twister is my try
I'm for mystery, not interpretive answers. ... The answer is never the answer. What's really interesting is the mystery. If you seek the mystery instead of the answer, you'll always be seeking. I've never seen anybody really find the answer, but they think they have. So they stop thinking. But the job is to seek mystery, evoke mystery, plant a garden in which strange plants grow and mysteries bloom. The need for mystery is greater than the need for an answer
One of these days you're going to have a visitation. You're going to be walking down the street and across the street you're going to look and see God standing over there on the street corner motioning to you, saying, 'Come to me, come to me.' And you will know it's God, there will be no doubt in your mind - he has slitty little eyes like Buddha, and he's got a long nice beard and blood on his hands. He's got a big Charlton Heston jaw like Moses, he's stacked like Venus, and he has a great jeweled scimitar like Mohammed. And God will tell you to come to him and sing his praises. And he will promise that if you do, all of the muses that ever visited Shakespeare will fly in your ear and out of your mouth like golden pennies. It's the job of the writer in America to say, "Fuck you God, fuck you and the Old Testament that you rode in on, fuck you." The job of the writer is to kiss no ass, no matter how big and holy and white and tempting and powerful.
"I can't help it. I was born a miscarriage. I had so many insults I died. I was born dead. I can't help it.... I'm tired."
A psychedelic experience is
characterized by the perception of aspects of one's mind previously unknown, or by the creative exuberance of the mind liberated from its ordinary restraints. Psychedelic states are one of the stations on the spectrum of experiences elicited by sensory deprivation as well as by psychedelic substances. On that same spectrum will be found illusions, changes of perception, altered states of awareness, mystical states, and occasionally states resembling schizophrenia. The word psychedelic comes from a combination of two Greek words: psyche (ψυχή) and delos (δήλος). Literally, it means "soul manifestation".
The psychedelic experience is an intimate experience, but there are many common themes, and ranges from a sense of connectedness to everything in the immediate vicinity, to a sense of oneness with everything in the universe. Potentially, the range of the drug-induced psychedelic experience goes far beyond drugs. Hallucinogens have these effects, in contrast to heroin, for example, and its depressant effects.
Some who undertake such experiences come to see them as an ordeal, and mentally overbearing. For many, such experiences come to be seen as personal re-enactments of a hero's journey. Spiritual practices and Psychedelic drugs can be used as a means to achieve states of mind in which novel perceptions can arise, unhindered by everyday mental filters and processes. The mental and emotional impact of the experience is positive and enduring for many.
Research that was done during the 1960s suggested that psychedelic drugs might have medical uses. More recently, the Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies (MAPS), the Heffter Research Institute, and the Beckley Foundation have continued studying the effects of the psychedelic experience.
Levels of psychedelic experience
The Psychedelic Experience FAQ describes five different levels of psychedelic experience acquired by substances and chemicals:
[edit]Level 1
This level produces a mild "high" effect, with some visual enhancement (e.g. brighter colors) and music sounds "wider," or more piercing to the ears. There is a sense that one's thoughts are spiralling into themselves. This level can be achieved from a normal dose of cannabis or a very low dose of a classic psychedelic such as psilocybin. Occasionally common
prescription drugs like SSRIs can produce mild 'trippy' effects, as well, though they are not normally classified as psychedelic experiences because they are so mild.
[edit]Level 2
Bright colors; visuals (e.g. things may appear to move or breathe); some two-dimensional patterns become apparent upon shutting eyes. Confused, cyclic (thought loop) or reminiscent thoughts. Déjà vu is commonly reported. Change in short term memory leads to continually distracting thought patterns. While it may become increasingly difficult to follow a single train of thought, at other times one might find themselves lost in deep introspection about one specific idea or problem. The need to see 'normal' reality becomes less, the urge to venture 'beyond the void' becomes more. Level 3 tripping can intersperse with level 2 as long as eyes are shut. This state can be achieved from higher doses of cannabis or a low dose of psilocybin or LSD.
[edit]Level 3
Very obvious visuals, everything looking curved and/or warped, patterns, kaleidoscopes or fractal images seen on walls, landscapes, faces, etc. Closed eye hallucinations become three dimensional. There is some crossing of the senses (synesthesia). Time distortions and "moments of eternity". Movement at times becomes extremely difficult. A normal dose of either psilocybin or LSD can produce this state. A very high dose cannabis can sometimes produce this state
[edit]Level 4
Strong visual effects, e.g. objects morphing into other objects. Dissolving or multiple splitting of the ego (e.g. things start talking, or feeling of contradictory things simultaneously). The loss of sense of self can bring a shift in the sense of reality, often accompanied by a sense of ineffable lucidity. Time becomes very distorted and participants may perceive an activity lasting only minutes to have encompassed hours of their own reality (or vice versa). Out-of-body experiences, and mystical visions are common at this level. A high dose of psilocybin or LSD can produce this effect, as can a normal dose of Salvia divinorum (for a shorter duration).
Level 5
Total loss of visual connection with reality. The senses cease to function in the normal way. One may feel like they are merging with space, other objects, or the universe, or feel oneness with the world. There are powerful, and sometimes brutal, psycho-physical reactions interpreted by some users as reliving their own birth. Feelings of reaching to the beginning or the end of space and time. The loss of reality becomes so extreme that it becomes ineffable. Dream or movie-like states, people have been reported seeing themselves in entirely different settings than their original setting. Many people experience religious phenomenon at this level. Often mentioned are an "all-powerful presence" or a "universal knowledge" which many equate to their idea of God or enlightenment. Earlier levels are relatively easy to describe in terms of measurable changes in perception and thought patterns. "Ego loss", or complete dissolution of one's awareness of the existence of self, is an essential trait of level 5 experiences; the boundaries between "self" and encompassing reality cease to exist, and all that one is conscious of is the abstract manifestations of the hallucination. Thoughts are not processed or realized in words or an "inner voice", as in everyday life; in the midst of a level 5 hallucination, it is essentially impossible to distinguish conscious thought from the hallucination itself. This feeling has been described, with tryptamine-based hallucinogens like LSD or high doses of psilocybin, as a sense of "oneness" with the universe; with extremely powerful entheogens such as DMT or salvia divinorum, the resultant hallucination is difficult to describe, but has been likened by some to being "transformed into a Picasso painting". Many people claim to have spoken to intelligent entities during their trips, to have experienced alternate dimensions, or to have existed for thousands of years - often not as a human but as an abstract entity such as a shadow or paint - though the trip itself, in the case of salvia and DMT, lasted only five to ten minutes. This effect can be produced in high doses of LSD, DXM, Ketamine, salvia divinorum, and high doses of psilocybin. DMT and salvia divinorum are known to send people to level 5 with an average dose, making them some of the most powerful psychoactive psychedelics known to humans.