DORKAGE: House 4x08 You Don't Want To Know
HEE. So many gigglesome moments in this episode, for serious. Review first, as usual, then ridiculously obsessive pic-spam to follow. (MMMM, House/Cuddy scene of GORGEOUS and much hilarity...
Behold - the thong of LISA CUDDY. Use its power wisely, my friends.
- IT'S FINALLY LUPUS! I loved how that was the answer to the medical puzzle in this episode - because everything was about mystery, and not knowing, and the power and wonder you can get from not knowing, and the sheer mundanity of it all when you DO know. And we do know, and oops, it's lupus, at last. Hee. Great set-up there.
- Awwww. I'm bummed that Cole got fired, because he was one of my favourites of the ducklets. There was so much potential, with the being-Mormon and the single-dad and the getting-in-House's-face thing that I really did think he'd hang around. Although clever writers that we have on this show, they made it so realistic - he seemed like such a nice, non-conniving guy, and hello. He totally sold Kutner down the river and the only reason he failed is because House figured out his ploy! Again with the totally unexpected (crazy!Brennan was a great example of that...).
- To be accurate, his and Cuddy's ploy. HELLO, CUDDY. You are hardly in the episode and yet you were full of win! Instead of objectifying her with the whole thong contest thing, thank GOD she held her own and totally got her fingers in House's cookie jar. *ahem* Since there wasn't much Cuddy, I went a little crazy with the House caps instead. But this was a great monologue; I love how House immediately figured out it was Cuddy. It had her naughty little fingerprints all over it.
[Cole picks Kutner.]
House: He was right about this being a real case. He was right about the botched transfusion. And he's your love nugget. You got no reason to pick him. But somebody else does. Kutner's a liability. He electrocuted himself, put a patient on fire, it's only a matter of time before he burns the hospital down. You made a deal with Cuddy. That's how you got her underwear. She sold it to you, for the right to put her choices on the block.
Cole: You said get her underwear. I got it.
House: Your scheme was brilliant. And you're fired.
Cole: You're all about breaking the rules!
House: Her rules, not mine. The whole point of this was to subvert Cuddy. You became her partner. Gave her power she didn't already have. Let her greedy fingers into my cookie jar, which sadly is not as dirty as it sounds. Thanks for playing.
- I liked how each of the ducklets came up to Cole after that to try and secure their spots - except the imminently mysterious 13 (whose mystery we finally figure out, more on this later). Kutner was totally frat-boy with him, and Taub tried to bribe him, and CTB was just... CTB.
- As for 13: well, it's too bad she's not a serial murderer. That would have been fun. I guess the possible Huntington's does have a lot of potential as a storyline - and it certainly explains a lot about the way she seems almost blase about the whole competition thing. I liked it how she compared taking a job with House to skydiving or climbing a volcan: so true! She'd risk it all to work with him, and I think that's clear from how all the other candidates are still trying their darnedest to stay on in PPTH. The final scene was so House/Camerony though - totally harks back to that episode I cannot name (I can't do the episode-naming thing for House/Cam moments, obviously!), when he tested her for HIV and totally read the results first. Except this time, he didn't, and he even threw them away. WTF?! Are we to believe that House, eternally curious, suck-all-the-mystery-out-of-life House, actually wants some questions left in his life? Cue the House/13 shippers going round the bend, man. Especially with that scene in the chair in which he commented about how tying him down was a bit much for a first date and she said he'd clearly never dated her before.
- I'll decide if I like her later. I DID love House drugging her with coffee though. Heh. SO House, that.
- I actually liked the POTW this week - a little bit obnoxious, but it was great when he flummoxed House and House just kept badgering him for the secret to the trick. I can definitely see House having gone through a magic phase as a kid, just to prove he could find out all the tricks and explain away all the fakery. Oh, and be the best kid messing around with cards on the playground, of course. So awesome how he kept worrying at the guy, with the no-wonder-in-the-first-place argument. So what are we supposed to believe, now that he didn't open 13's test results? Hmmm...
- SO MUCH FUNNY, I must say. I LOVED how CTB and Taub were trying so hard to get Cuddy's thong the House-approved way i.e., behind her back. Taub stalking Cuddy through the plate-glass window was so hilarious:
CTB: Thought you weren't playing.
Taub: I'm not.
CTB: She'll fire you if she catches you.
Taub: I don't think she can fire me for not trying to steal her panties.
CTB: You trying to will them off? LOL, this was a line of awesome!
Taub: If I had a plan, the first part would be not telling you what the plan was.
- I LIKED Foreman in this episode! Probably because he was minimally around, for one thing, but also because he was funny and cutting the way he can sometimes be. Much better than neurotic, holier-than-thou, don't-wanna-be-yoooou-House Foreman. MUCH better. Like when he threatened to play the Cuddy card! Woot! To wit, these moments are great, not just because House is all about the Cuddy!thong, which is brilliant, but because of Foreman's reactions:
"I need you to bring me THE THONG OF LISA CUDDY."
FOREMAN REACTION SHOT OF LOL:
Also funny: House saying, "Not kidding. Thong. Cuddy. Go." And Foreman telling the babies on the way out, "It's how I got hired." LOL.
Same for this moment, when Taub appears with fauxCuddypanties:
House: These are not Cuddy's panties.
Taub: You don't think that I...
House: No. Also, she's wearing a red bra today. Like I'm the only one who noticed! Means the downstairs will match. Ah, House. I LOVE HOW OBSESSIVE YOU ARE ABOUT TEH CUDDY'S UNDERWEAR, YES I DO.
Foreman: Do your research, people. LOL!!!!
- And no Chase! *sadface* I guess I can take no Chase if it means no Cameron...
- Sigh. House and his whole testing himself with the blood transfusion thing - how many times does he want to tempt death this season? Obviously he was confident he was right (and he was) and it was just a bad reaction. (I did get a little ascared for House though!) I liked Wilson coming in to confront him a little at the end though. "I usually like to give the lethal blood to Foreman, but I'm the only one who's type AB." LOL, House FTW!! And yes, he would be the universal recipient and Wilson would be the universal donor! Such an apt metaphor. =)
- Which brings me to the OTHER scene of cute between House and Wilson. WILSON TOTALLY KNOWS THAT HOUSE HAS THE HOTS FOR CUDDY and is wooing her playground-style, the only way he knows how. By getting his homies to steal her knickers, that's how!!!
House: Do you think they had sex? Awwww! House is sooooo jealous!
Wilson: They're both single. It's still legal in the blue states.
House: She barely knows him!
Wilson: You know, in some cultures, hiring people to steal someone's underpants is considered wooing. You should move there. Because here, you know, it's just creepy. WILSON ILU!
House: There was no woo. It was an effective test. House, you're in denial...
- And, randomly, CUDDY. WHY ARE YOU SO PRETTY?
So. There was totally NOT ENOUGH CUDDY in the episode. We needed a final scene to resolve the whole panty-napping thing. I think this requires FIC. Still, less Cuddy screentime doesn't mean I couldn't spam the hell out of the one scene between her and House though, because, OMG, look at this - PROOF OF WIN.
Eyes up, House! It's like they're maaaagneeeetiiiiicaaaaaaally drawn to her butt. Hee.
And thanks to
crumpled_up for pointing this out to me:
Click for the ridiculously detailed photo story and the ZOOM ON CUDDY'S ASS.
HOUSE/CUDDY PHOTO STORY #95328 - Of a boy and his super-tanker...
As per normal, new dialogue in red, my flailage in green! =)
[It's just another day at PPTH. House is getting that Vicodin prescription filled - he imagines he'll need it, for all the pain Cuddy's going to put him through later...]
[Oh wait, there she is! Better get loaded up NOW in case she wants TEH HOT TABLE SEX.]
House: ...... oxygen. being. sucked. out. of. room. cannot. concentrate. cuddy's. asssssssssssss...
[He tosses his Vicodin bottle on the ground to get her attention. But, more importantly, to get her to bend over...]
[Even Cuddy's do-me pumps with the little black bows know what House is up to...]
[She looks over. SUCCESS.]
[House does the whole, awww, I'm a cripple, honey. *sadface*]
Cuddy: I'll get it. *exasperated face*
NOW WATCH THE ZOOM OF WIN:
[House gets, understandably, a little hot under the collar...]
House: Oh...
... My... [fill in the blanks = Cuddy!]
... GOD! You're not wearing underwear! *HOUSE FLAILS*
Cuddy: Of course I'm not, you idiot, you won the bet remember?...!!
House: Skirt that tight, you got no secrets. WIN. WIN WIN WIN.
Cuddy: !!!!!!!
House: Skirt that tight I can tell if you got an IUD. You seen Cole? Okay, so what's with the birth control thing?!? First the pills, now the IUD. The pills can be explained by the need to regulate cycles for a woman who's had a miscarriage (thanks for clearing that up, LE), but the IUD? House and Cuddy are so doing the nasty offscreen. SO. DOING. THE. NASTY.
Cuddy: No...
House: You're blushing. And yes, LE is such an amazing actress that Cuddy actually is blushing.
Cuddy: I am not... OMG. She's so averting her eyes. SO CUTE, AIEEEE.
House: Look at me.
*combusts at LE's prettiness* I. AM. SO. GAY. RIGHT. NOW. I literally cannot think straight.
House: OH.
MY.
GOD.
[House looks around to make sure everybody heard him. Yes indeed. Teh Cuddy has gone commando... he's in for a wild ride tonight!!]
Um. I clearly got ALL KINDS of carried away with that scene. It lasted like, thirty seconds or something. My pic spam makes it look like it lasted for weeks. Heh. Think of all the hot table sexings House and Cuddy could carry out in weeks!
Bring on next week.
Edited to add: O. M. G. The new episode clip starring House/Cuddy for 4x09 is up at the Fox.com/house site. *keyboards* aosafjwoetjwlsaerwqpkdlkngs! They. Are. Adorable. And Bantery. AND SO MUCH LOVE. Aww. I like this blushing theme between the two of them. Can't wait for new episode ALREADY! ;)
Behold - the thong of LISA CUDDY. Use its power wisely, my friends.
- IT'S FINALLY LUPUS! I loved how that was the answer to the medical puzzle in this episode - because everything was about mystery, and not knowing, and the power and wonder you can get from not knowing, and the sheer mundanity of it all when you DO know. And we do know, and oops, it's lupus, at last. Hee. Great set-up there.
- Awwww. I'm bummed that Cole got fired, because he was one of my favourites of the ducklets. There was so much potential, with the being-Mormon and the single-dad and the getting-in-House's-face thing that I really did think he'd hang around. Although clever writers that we have on this show, they made it so realistic - he seemed like such a nice, non-conniving guy, and hello. He totally sold Kutner down the river and the only reason he failed is because House figured out his ploy! Again with the totally unexpected (crazy!Brennan was a great example of that...).
- To be accurate, his and Cuddy's ploy. HELLO, CUDDY. You are hardly in the episode and yet you were full of win! Instead of objectifying her with the whole thong contest thing, thank GOD she held her own and totally got her fingers in House's cookie jar. *ahem* Since there wasn't much Cuddy, I went a little crazy with the House caps instead. But this was a great monologue; I love how House immediately figured out it was Cuddy. It had her naughty little fingerprints all over it.
[Cole picks Kutner.]
House: He was right about this being a real case. He was right about the botched transfusion. And he's your love nugget. You got no reason to pick him. But somebody else does. Kutner's a liability. He electrocuted himself, put a patient on fire, it's only a matter of time before he burns the hospital down. You made a deal with Cuddy. That's how you got her underwear. She sold it to you, for the right to put her choices on the block.
Cole: You said get her underwear. I got it.
House: Your scheme was brilliant. And you're fired.
Cole: You're all about breaking the rules!
House: Her rules, not mine. The whole point of this was to subvert Cuddy. You became her partner. Gave her power she didn't already have. Let her greedy fingers into my cookie jar, which sadly is not as dirty as it sounds. Thanks for playing.
- I liked how each of the ducklets came up to Cole after that to try and secure their spots - except the imminently mysterious 13 (whose mystery we finally figure out, more on this later). Kutner was totally frat-boy with him, and Taub tried to bribe him, and CTB was just... CTB.
- As for 13: well, it's too bad she's not a serial murderer. That would have been fun. I guess the possible Huntington's does have a lot of potential as a storyline - and it certainly explains a lot about the way she seems almost blase about the whole competition thing. I liked it how she compared taking a job with House to skydiving or climbing a volcan: so true! She'd risk it all to work with him, and I think that's clear from how all the other candidates are still trying their darnedest to stay on in PPTH. The final scene was so House/Camerony though - totally harks back to that episode I cannot name (I can't do the episode-naming thing for House/Cam moments, obviously!), when he tested her for HIV and totally read the results first. Except this time, he didn't, and he even threw them away. WTF?! Are we to believe that House, eternally curious, suck-all-the-mystery-out-of-life House, actually wants some questions left in his life? Cue the House/13 shippers going round the bend, man. Especially with that scene in the chair in which he commented about how tying him down was a bit much for a first date and she said he'd clearly never dated her before.
- I'll decide if I like her later. I DID love House drugging her with coffee though. Heh. SO House, that.
- I actually liked the POTW this week - a little bit obnoxious, but it was great when he flummoxed House and House just kept badgering him for the secret to the trick. I can definitely see House having gone through a magic phase as a kid, just to prove he could find out all the tricks and explain away all the fakery. Oh, and be the best kid messing around with cards on the playground, of course. So awesome how he kept worrying at the guy, with the no-wonder-in-the-first-place argument. So what are we supposed to believe, now that he didn't open 13's test results? Hmmm...
- SO MUCH FUNNY, I must say. I LOVED how CTB and Taub were trying so hard to get Cuddy's thong the House-approved way i.e., behind her back. Taub stalking Cuddy through the plate-glass window was so hilarious:
CTB: Thought you weren't playing.
Taub: I'm not.
CTB: She'll fire you if she catches you.
Taub: I don't think she can fire me for not trying to steal her panties.
CTB: You trying to will them off? LOL, this was a line of awesome!
Taub: If I had a plan, the first part would be not telling you what the plan was.
- I LIKED Foreman in this episode! Probably because he was minimally around, for one thing, but also because he was funny and cutting the way he can sometimes be. Much better than neurotic, holier-than-thou, don't-wanna-be-yoooou-House Foreman. MUCH better. Like when he threatened to play the Cuddy card! Woot! To wit, these moments are great, not just because House is all about the Cuddy!thong, which is brilliant, but because of Foreman's reactions:
"I need you to bring me THE THONG OF LISA CUDDY."
FOREMAN REACTION SHOT OF LOL:
Also funny: House saying, "Not kidding. Thong. Cuddy. Go." And Foreman telling the babies on the way out, "It's how I got hired." LOL.
Same for this moment, when Taub appears with fauxCuddypanties:
House: These are not Cuddy's panties.
Taub: You don't think that I...
House: No. Also, she's wearing a red bra today. Like I'm the only one who noticed! Means the downstairs will match. Ah, House. I LOVE HOW OBSESSIVE YOU ARE ABOUT TEH CUDDY'S UNDERWEAR, YES I DO.
Foreman: Do your research, people. LOL!!!!
- And no Chase! *sadface* I guess I can take no Chase if it means no Cameron...
- Sigh. House and his whole testing himself with the blood transfusion thing - how many times does he want to tempt death this season? Obviously he was confident he was right (and he was) and it was just a bad reaction. (I did get a little ascared for House though!) I liked Wilson coming in to confront him a little at the end though. "I usually like to give the lethal blood to Foreman, but I'm the only one who's type AB." LOL, House FTW!! And yes, he would be the universal recipient and Wilson would be the universal donor! Such an apt metaphor. =)
- Which brings me to the OTHER scene of cute between House and Wilson. WILSON TOTALLY KNOWS THAT HOUSE HAS THE HOTS FOR CUDDY and is wooing her playground-style, the only way he knows how. By getting his homies to steal her knickers, that's how!!!
House: Do you think they had sex? Awwww! House is sooooo jealous!
Wilson: They're both single. It's still legal in the blue states.
House: She barely knows him!
Wilson: You know, in some cultures, hiring people to steal someone's underpants is considered wooing. You should move there. Because here, you know, it's just creepy. WILSON ILU!
House: There was no woo. It was an effective test. House, you're in denial...
- And, randomly, CUDDY. WHY ARE YOU SO PRETTY?
So. There was totally NOT ENOUGH CUDDY in the episode. We needed a final scene to resolve the whole panty-napping thing. I think this requires FIC. Still, less Cuddy screentime doesn't mean I couldn't spam the hell out of the one scene between her and House though, because, OMG, look at this - PROOF OF WIN.
Eyes up, House! It's like they're maaaagneeeetiiiiicaaaaaaally drawn to her butt. Hee.
And thanks to
crumpled_up for pointing this out to me:
Click for the ridiculously detailed photo story and the ZOOM ON CUDDY'S ASS.
HOUSE/CUDDY PHOTO STORY #95328 - Of a boy and his super-tanker...
As per normal, new dialogue in red, my flailage in green! =)
[It's just another day at PPTH. House is getting that Vicodin prescription filled - he imagines he'll need it, for all the pain Cuddy's going to put him through later...]
[Oh wait, there she is! Better get loaded up NOW in case she wants TEH HOT TABLE SEX.]
House: ...... oxygen. being. sucked. out. of. room. cannot. concentrate. cuddy's. asssssssssssss...
[He tosses his Vicodin bottle on the ground to get her attention. But, more importantly, to get her to bend over...]
[Even Cuddy's do-me pumps with the little black bows know what House is up to...]
[She looks over. SUCCESS.]
[House does the whole, awww, I'm a cripple, honey. *sadface*]
Cuddy: I'll get it. *exasperated face*
NOW WATCH THE ZOOM OF WIN:
[House gets, understandably, a little hot under the collar...]
House: Oh...
... My... [fill in the blanks = Cuddy!]
... GOD! You're not wearing underwear! *HOUSE FLAILS*
Cuddy: Of course I'm not, you idiot, you won the bet remember?...!!
House: Skirt that tight, you got no secrets. WIN. WIN WIN WIN.
Cuddy: !!!!!!!
House: Skirt that tight I can tell if you got an IUD. You seen Cole? Okay, so what's with the birth control thing?!? First the pills, now the IUD. The pills can be explained by the need to regulate cycles for a woman who's had a miscarriage (thanks for clearing that up, LE), but the IUD? House and Cuddy are so doing the nasty offscreen. SO. DOING. THE. NASTY.
Cuddy: No...
House: You're blushing. And yes, LE is such an amazing actress that Cuddy actually is blushing.
Cuddy: I am not... OMG. She's so averting her eyes. SO CUTE, AIEEEE.
House: Look at me.
*combusts at LE's prettiness* I. AM. SO. GAY. RIGHT. NOW. I literally cannot think straight.
House: OH.
MY.
GOD.
[House looks around to make sure everybody heard him. Yes indeed. Teh Cuddy has gone commando... he's in for a wild ride tonight!!]
Um. I clearly got ALL KINDS of carried away with that scene. It lasted like, thirty seconds or something. My pic spam makes it look like it lasted for weeks. Heh. Think of all the hot table sexings House and Cuddy could carry out in weeks!
Bring on next week.
Edited to add: O. M. G. The new episode clip starring House/Cuddy for 4x09 is up at the Fox.com/house site. *keyboards* aosafjwoetjwlsaerwqpkdlkngs! They. Are. Adorable. And Bantery. AND SO MUCH LOVE. Aww. I like this blushing theme between the two of them. Can't wait for new episode ALREADY! ;)