May 19, 2005 10:03
...nah, i'm just damn tired and sleepy. restless night..not that i did anything naughty (*wink*wink) hehehehe...but i had a lot of work and it caught up with me. last night i had dinner at my grandparent's house with my mom and dad. the whole family's here since they all attended my (other) grandma's 82nd birthday. nothing grand but it was enjoyable and meaningful nonetheless. the china trip turned out to be too impersonal so she decided to have it in tagaytay instead. mass & a pilmigrage at the chapel of batulao was said to be very spiritual followed by merienda-cena at antonio's b&b. i had work so i came after with my bro and jay. it was pouring when we left manila to go up. i didn't take any pictures cos' everyone brought their own cameras to play with. anyway, my digicam was with my bro and i just didn't feel up to it. the highlight of dinner was the food. loved my pesto-salmon covered in mashed tatoes!! there were several celebrants in our huge family who were made to blow b-day cakes too. so it was cool and a great idea.
change in weather may be good for some but i think its really wack now. its bad enough that its freakin' hot then it rains like mad too. people'll end up getting sick. my colleague is absent, which means she's sick and lucky shit'll be exempted from our meeting later this afternoon. darn!! i had to read the vienna convention on consular protocol, guess what!? i dozed off..its real boring but i finished it, barely. last time we had one on diplomatic protocol. i don't really know the essence of these meetings but i guess its knowledge-worthy (as if i don't know this already, i studied this in uni!!) so i'll keep the sighs to myself. makes me want to skip work too but not just yet (just kidding, i'm not that irresponsible).
i'm happy that my sis is back. i have someone to bond and share girly things with. not that i don't have that with my cousin, inez. but we hardly see each other bet. my work & her school. anyway, my sis will be looking for work soon. she's decided on a multinational corp. (as advised by my dad)..loréal maybe..she can use her french. frequent discounts for my mom & i if she gets in. hehe ;)
speaking of family, i LOVE them. my cousin/godson, enzo just came up to me yesterday and smothered me with lotsa hugs & kisses just cos' he missed me. awww, sweet! he's such a cute 3 yr. old!! i saw my niece, anuk & nephew, rafa and they are such adorable babies. having everyone back here is essential, it feels like HOME. sometimes i lose track of things and just go with the city pace that eventually it gets lonely. i end up wanting to go back to the province but its not really at the back of my head constantly. it comes and goes.
now that i come to think of it, i appreciate so much more Zach Braff's movie "GARDEN STATE", the feeling of the home you used to know exists in some other time. HOME for me now is being with someone i love and the people i treasure. being homesick doesn't exist for me, not at 25. i know i've mentioned this 3 times already but i just relate to the film, especially if its based on someone else's life. knowing that i'm going through something that someone else experienced is very REAL. i think i'm at my quarter-life crisis stage, with the rest of the twenty-something population. i don't worry cos' i know i can cope. but the feeling of struggle & frustration of not meeting your goals is extremely high and sometimes your just at your lowest. an uneventful time, i call it. i feel i've accomplished what i could have in the last 3/4 years although i feel i could've done better. its a good thing i didn't raise the bar, its important not to expect a lot from someone and that i guess is one of the reasons why i'm not so hard on myself. now, i just want to do the things that make me happy & content.
in my last entry i was whining, one of my frustrations. i'll keep it at that! but i'm still my old self. i've just found new goals to meet. my plans have changed. you know, things happen for a reason so i accept them with a challenge ;) when my parents arrived last monday, i took my mom shopping in this new mall called "market market". we bought my grandma's bag there & some other neat stuff for summer. i love shopping with my mom!! i guess i got my keen eye for things from her (she's an inner artist). oh, watched "AMITYVILLE" with my mom & aunt patty afterwards. i thought it to be well-drawn from the book but the older film was so much scarier...then tuesday was my grandma's birthday...and then uh, yesterday was dinner with my mom's parents as mentioned above and so and so, i think i was pretty much out of it yesterday cos' i was just too damn sleepy to care. my grandma's birthday (dad's mom) last tuesday ended late evening already and the ride back down was an hour & a half so we came home at 12 midnight, i slept at 1am. the next day the same. so right now, i am lacking a huge amount of sleep & my body's calling for it.
CANCEL our MEETING puh-lease!!! like that'll happen right. well, just a suggestion cos' i can count that none of us really happened to incorporate what we just read yesterday evening.
one word: CILLIAN MURPHY, gadd, he's hot and not to mention real smart!!! i just caught one of his movies on HBO with JONATHAN JACKSON (what's not to like) and well, there was a lot of swooning involved. add that to my book of extremely gorgeous, intelligent men.
1. ROBERT SCHWARTZMAN a.k.a CARMINE- Lead Vocalist of Rooney (he writes most of the songs), brother of Actor Jason Schwartzman & son of Thalia Coppola Shire, he starred in a few movies of his cousin, Sofia Coppola.
2. ZACH BRAFF- he's had lotsa movies under his belt but my favorite is "The Broken Hearts Club. what really made him was the T.V. Series "Scrubs" and his directorial debut "Garden State", love that movie. this intellectual hunk's first love is really directing and he's making his mark in Hollywood with a few upcoming movies this year. he's a writer, actor, producer, director, anything..you name it. nothing is endless with this guy!!
3. RICKY ULLMAN- this young cutie has been in theatre and acting all his life but his love for singing tops his succesful list of accomplishments. Remember him in Growing up Brady, younger bro of Adam Brody? He plays lead role in Disney's "Phil of the Future", has made special guest appearances in "Law & Order, That's So Raven, & Guiding Light". He's also had several mini movies like "Pixel Perfect, The Boys of Sunset Ridge, & Crossfire".
note: i know its a small list. but sincerely, i admire all of them. its not just a fan thing. i look up to them, how they've created their lives to be, how they're doing the things they love, and its always for a purpose/cause.
uploading pics...............40%
* i haven't gotten to do that in so long. when i have time. i still need to put the stills of Boracay & Bicol.
jumping to next few things on my mind:
-detailed plan of resignation from the Embassy in 1 year's time
-expense for US/Mexico/Hawaii trip next summer (if my VL is granted, if not i may have to forego it)
-look for another job in 2007 to compensate my lack of funds for school. i'll try to get into a cruiseliner agency/travel agency for the travel priviledges..will ask if they also have transfer opportunities just in case i leave for australia
-try to get a part-time job too for extra income
-research on established fashion design schools in sydney
-take the foreign service exam
-renew my driver's license
-take a short trip to asia with my mom
TRAGEDY & SURPRISE parcel ready for delivery..who's up? i'm in the waiting line and my number hasn't been called..but i know the buzzer will go off when it's my turn, then what'll i do. "just smile princess" that's all.