Comments | elle_icit: Out of the Blue.

elle_icit

Out of the Blue.

Oct 15, 2008 11:20

I thought I'd had a really bad day yesterday.......well not me......... other people. A phone call from the Sister let me know our mutual friend Jane has cancer in it's late stages..... which has now spread to her liver and she has around three months before she dies. *sigh* Jane is 51. I knew (don't ask me how, I just did) when we first met two ( Read more... )

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me_pirateship October 15 2008, 19:26:41 UTC

*huge comforting hugs*
I'm so sorry about your friend.

As I've told you (was it in the bar at Picadilly Circus?): You give the impression that you know how to live - because you are surrounded by such a VERY strong sense of ... well... just life, living... really living, actively living, leaving deep impressions in your fellow humans, not just existing, I mean. *HUGS* I'm very glad to know you.

elle_icit October 15 2008, 20:22:31 UTC

Thank you sweety. *HUG* I'm feeling slightly differently about it now since I've spoken to her and I'm.......well thinking.
After I leave Nuremberg, where I fully intend to have a great time, I'll spend Christmas in London, then go on to the Island for New Year. I am (at the moment) dreading attending her 'goodbye party' It's a very different way of looking at death and I'm struggling with it a bit. (All very well in theory ...but in practice?) I should take a leaf from the 12 year old nephews book. His response was .....Hmmm....How much fun can she have in three months?'

me_pirateship October 16 2008, 00:00:41 UTC

So she really wants to have everyone come and say goodbye... well, it DOES mean the morphine works and she's not suffering too much, otherwise she'd not want to see and talk to anybody. Maybe she actually manages to live those last few weeks according to the wise 12-year old's rules...

So is she a really close friend of your sister's then? Good that you stay with her over New Year. This IS time and energy you invest in YOUR life, being there for your sister, mainly. You can't do much for Jane. I wish you that you manage not to let yourself be dragged down too much.

elle_icit October 16 2008, 17:59:12 UTC

Sometimes kids are wiser than adults because they don't have such a strong developed sense of things like duty, obligation, politeness or guilt. These are the things that can often get in the way of us doing what we want rather than what others want us to do.

Yes, she is home from hospital staying with sister (who is strongest and most open person who can support her no problem...not to mention the 3 nephews) and will be on a flight to South America tomorrow where she will have FUN ....where she can do what she wants to do. I SO VERY much hope she will be alive at New Year as I want to see her face to face and say goodbye. It will upset me sweety but not drag me down.

me_pirateship October 16 2008, 18:47:03 UTC

Oh, good she's not bedbound. Will there be someone to come with her, take care of her, carry her suitcase, care for her (does she need to be looked after by medical stuff?).

I hadn't reallized your sister (and you) and her were SUCH close. *HUGS* Doesn't she have any family at all or couldn't they cope with her dying?

If you want to go there as soon as you'll be free in December instead of comming to Nuremberg, don't hesitate to tell me. (I can imagine cancelling the hotel in time is no problem.) I WOULD be quite sad as I'm looking forward to your visit very much, but we'll find some other time. *HUGS*

elle_icit October 16 2008, 19:51:03 UTC

Loads of people to help and be there for her......medical people amongst her friends too.

Her family want her to stay in bed and waste away........ all the while hoping for a miracle....so no they can't cope with her dying. *LOL* She has other plans.

Don't be silly sweety. :-))) Life doesn't stop. AND I need to relax and have fun. Jane knows that. Hopefully she will be there (in whatever condition) in the New Year. She also knows she could die in South America and knowing that she has made her choice. I'm really glad she is going and that she will be with the Sister and Nephews. And other(very wise) friends and ......the horses.

me_pirateship October 16 2008, 21:30:08 UTC

She sounds like one of those people who attract miracles, though...

Fun? Yep, I'll take you to the medieval torture museum and the Nazis' "Reichsparteitag" with the museum about Nuremberg War Crime Trials... *HUGS*, glad you'll be coming.

elle_icit October 16 2008, 20:07:54 UTC

*LOL* and not only do I want to see YOU...... I can't possibly pass up the opportunity to eat in a restaurant........ totally naked. :-)))

me_pirateship October 16 2008, 21:41:58 UTC

*LOL*... I dare you to USE that opportunity... *ROFL* :-)

elle_icit October 16 2008, 21:59:10 UTC

*LOL* Challenge noted and accepted........erm is it a busy restaurant?

me_pirateship October 16 2008, 22:26:21 UTC

Depends... probably before Christmas it IS.

Hey, here's a link to the restaurant, cklick on the pics to enlarge them. (*LOL*, everyone of the models wrapped in their robes or towels. Good. *LOL*)

http://www.fuerthermare.de/gastronomie/saunagastronomie.html

Oh, they're changing the pool - so no access to the sport pool during December - But the thermal pools are open.

Still, my colleagues have warned me not to go there, as it is only 12 km from my school. But honestly, I've been there several times and never have met anyone. (I mean, without my glasses I'm virtually blind in the sauna, anyway... *LOL*, and so are most parents. *LOL*) If anyone of the parents is rude enough to adress me in the spa about kids' school grades and start to argue I'll politely wish them a nice day and send them away...

elle_icit October 17 2008, 19:31:26 UTC

That looks good! OK then, I'll wear my robe in the restaurant. :-)

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