you should know...time's tide will smother you...and i will too
agnes seems to want to be my friend. she is indeed much friendlier than her first impression suggested, i think. she wants me to call her "aggie," though, which i'm not sure i can do.
i am disturbed by my compulsive urge to stare in the locker room. of course i do not shower there myself, but i cannot help feeling distressingly suspicious in the midst of swarms of naked female bodies promenading all around me. i allow myself slight glimpses, but make a conscious exertion to ignore this landscape of luscious curves. i just can't seem to get used to a nudist environment, especially when the greater percentage of these bodies are young and smooth and sculpted.
it reminds me of the dreaded day camp i used to go to where all the girls changed into their bathing suits every day in the vestiaries by the lake. i was horrified each time by my apparently singular and unnatural interest in all the nakedness. wasn't i only supposed to be interested by naked boys? there was so much variety in the bodies of these little girls. some were very young, and others on the verge of puberty, with miniature globular buds of breasts, fuzzy tussocks emerging where the thighs met. i was uncomfortably and madly fascinated. a pervert and lesbian for sure, i thought.
but, no. i guess it's just interesting to see so many exposed bodies, which are usually hidden under layers of cloth. nudity is primal and reminds me cheerfully that humans are just animals. primates. mammals. it is strange and enthralling.
maybe all that is very childish of me.
hah.
i am going to see tortoise and bobby conn tonight and for this i am already thrilled. no need to be looking, as the show suggests.
excited!!
!
i am disturbed by my compulsive urge to stare in the locker room. of course i do not shower there myself, but i cannot help feeling distressingly suspicious in the midst of swarms of naked female bodies promenading all around me. i allow myself slight glimpses, but make a conscious exertion to ignore this landscape of luscious curves. i just can't seem to get used to a nudist environment, especially when the greater percentage of these bodies are young and smooth and sculpted.
it reminds me of the dreaded day camp i used to go to where all the girls changed into their bathing suits every day in the vestiaries by the lake. i was horrified each time by my apparently singular and unnatural interest in all the nakedness. wasn't i only supposed to be interested by naked boys? there was so much variety in the bodies of these little girls. some were very young, and others on the verge of puberty, with miniature globular buds of breasts, fuzzy tussocks emerging where the thighs met. i was uncomfortably and madly fascinated. a pervert and lesbian for sure, i thought.
but, no. i guess it's just interesting to see so many exposed bodies, which are usually hidden under layers of cloth. nudity is primal and reminds me cheerfully that humans are just animals. primates. mammals. it is strange and enthralling.
maybe all that is very childish of me.
hah.
i am going to see tortoise and bobby conn tonight and for this i am already thrilled. no need to be looking, as the show suggests.
excited!!
!