Meta: The God Complex.

[elisi]

This week’s Doctor Who is without a doubt one of my favourite things ever. It was beautiful and heartbreaking and hit one of my major, major kinks and it also - miracles of miracles - treated religion with intelligence, rather than just steal some imagery and then sneer. Basically it was [metaphorically, and literally] 1 Corinthians 13, 11-12 in

Comments

[janie_aire]

Get away from things? You mean, you use this to run away? Now that gets to the kernel of it.

The damn show won't let me run away, because I see so much of myself in it. Like, where I am right now in my life, and in my relationships.

For example, in Let's Kill Hitler there's this whole bit with River being judged by "Amy", which is to say by her mother. The situation is transformed by her self-sacrifice to save the Doctor -- for River, this is her act of Faith, the beginning of her devotions. It nearly kills her. In the end, though, she's recovering, receiving a light admonishment from Mom, and she says she "had to try." And Mom recognizes that, approves.

This whole setup is a mirror for *me*. I'm River, and I've jumped off the deep end in pursuit of my spiritual concerns. And my mother, she's been none too happy about this, the secular materialist that she is. I've been judged. And unfortunately, she has a point -- completely out of cash, still haven't finished my "work", and almost convinced to give it up and go back to a conventional life. But I can't, I just can't. I have to try.

That weekend after LKH I told her so. And she said she knew, and agreed to keep me afloat for another year. Which is *huge*. And really kind of mysterious.

Anyways.

[elisi]

As it happens, we have - this summer - completely turned our lives upside down (Darcy pursuing his lifelong dream), and we can't really afford it, but... It's worth it. Better to be poor, but fulfilled, than have money and be miserable.

Anyways, am very happy that your mother came through for you! *hugs*