DAMMIT AGAIN!!!
So I was laying in bed this morning minding my own business, when mr. piece and the kids burst into the room screaming,
"OH MY GOD MOM! MOM WAKE UP! IT'S ALL OVER THE NEWS!!"
I'm like "what the fuck is more important than me sleeping off my hangover?"
"THEY FOUND A REAL LIFE BIG FOOT! Some dude in Washington hit it with it's car!"
"Are you fucking for real? It's on the news! Are there pictures?? I WANT TO SEE IT!"
At this point I am completely awake and I (stumble) rush downstairs because they claim the whole fucking thing is on youtube. I sit down at the computer while evil child number 1 loads up the clip. Evil child number two tells me I need to get real close to the screen and squint because it's kinda fuzzy, but that if I pause it at just the right time, he is sure the fucking thing is wearing bells and a handkerchief. When it starts I get real close to the screen. My heart is racing in anticipation of seeing A REAL LIFE BIGFOOT! and you know what happened? It ended up being 1 minute of fuzz and then out of no where a fucking monkey pops up screaming and howling "APRIL FOOLS! APRIL FOOLS!" at the top of its lungs. The kids laughed and laughed and laughed clutching their stupid little sides and high fiving Mr. Piece all whilst yelling, "WE GOT HER AGAIN! WE LOVE APRIL FOOLS!!"
Now they have been singing "MOMMY LOVES A YETI! MOMMY LOVES A YETI!!"
All. Fucking. Morning.
Ok so it started with the "coon poo" story, and last year it was "children's lingerie" and this year it's a fucking sasquatch. GODDAMMIT WILL I EVER LEARN???
"OH MY GOD MOM! MOM WAKE UP! IT'S ALL OVER THE NEWS!!"
I'm like "what the fuck is more important than me sleeping off my hangover?"
"THEY FOUND A REAL LIFE BIG FOOT! Some dude in Washington hit it with it's car!"
"Are you fucking for real? It's on the news! Are there pictures?? I WANT TO SEE IT!"
At this point I am completely awake and I (stumble) rush downstairs because they claim the whole fucking thing is on youtube. I sit down at the computer while evil child number 1 loads up the clip. Evil child number two tells me I need to get real close to the screen and squint because it's kinda fuzzy, but that if I pause it at just the right time, he is sure the fucking thing is wearing bells and a handkerchief. When it starts I get real close to the screen. My heart is racing in anticipation of seeing A REAL LIFE BIGFOOT! and you know what happened? It ended up being 1 minute of fuzz and then out of no where a fucking monkey pops up screaming and howling "APRIL FOOLS! APRIL FOOLS!" at the top of its lungs. The kids laughed and laughed and laughed clutching their stupid little sides and high fiving Mr. Piece all whilst yelling, "WE GOT HER AGAIN! WE LOVE APRIL FOOLS!!"
Now they have been singing "MOMMY LOVES A YETI! MOMMY LOVES A YETI!!"
All. Fucking. Morning.
Ok so it started with the "coon poo" story, and last year it was "children's lingerie" and this year it's a fucking sasquatch. GODDAMMIT WILL I EVER LEARN???