Twenty Six.
I am home, very tired, tan, full of sand, and plus a few pounds.
The Micales eat a lot of junk on vacation.
I will never, so long as I live, ride in a car for that long again.
The trip to North Carolina alone took twelve hours.
We stopped in NC for a day to visit my Uncle Tim at his radical bachelor pad which consists of a mobile home sitting in the middle of twenty six acres of land.
He has a pond too.
He took us to the Golden Corrale.
Lauren and I don't get to go to too many buffets around here.
We ate until we couldn't move.
And there's no law against smoking in public places down there.
And everyone calls my parents "sir" and "ma'am."
The trip to Myrtle Beach from there was, like, another four hours.
I've never seen anything like it in my life.
Dozens and dozens of hotels all painted the same tacky blues, peaches, and yellows.
And the restaurants, there had to be a hundred of them.
And some of them were the same, there were like three of some restaurants on the same street.
Same with all the shops.
It blew my mind, but I totally loved it.
So, the ocean was completely amazing.
I was pleasantly surprised that it was, like, eighty degrees and full of waves.
My dad was frustrated when he asked me if I knew what ocean we were in and my response was, "....does it really matter?"
We immediatly had to go out and buy some of those body boards everyone was using.
So every day we spent the morning in the ocean, then in the afternoon, we went out and did stuff in the excruciating sun.
We went to a couple boardwalk-y type places.
We went out to a dinner/show.
We went to the Carolina Opry.
And in the middle of the show, they announce people who are there celebrating something.
"The Thomsons have been married fifty-six years! Wow! What an accomplishment. What's your secret?"
And this old couple stands up, and Mr. Thomson puts his little arm around his tiny wife and says, with the oldest, crackliest voice ever, "Make love ev'ry night."
You knew that was coming.
Still, I almost peed my pants laughing.
And we went to the Ripley's Believe It Or Not Odditorium.
We went out to breakfast and my mom ordered grits so we could try them.
I refused to on account of it looked like wet sand.
We went to a lot of little souvenir shops.
In this one tee shirt shop, there was this Russian girl working there.
She was showing Lauren and I the shirts and one of them said "Party Myrlte Beach."
So she goes, with her Russian accent, "PAHHTAYY MAHHTLE BEAHHCH!"
We laughed about it for the rest of the week.
So, it was an awesome vacation.
I did have to share a bed with Lauren.
I hog the covers, but she hogs the whole bed.
She would wake up in the morning and tell me how she pulled and pulled on the blankets but I wouldn't give her any.
Then, I would tell her how she kneed me in the ribs or slapped her arm acrossed my face.
But, she's a heavy sleeper.
You just keep pushing her away until she subconciously gives up.
My dad was really good.
He was really patient, hardly got mad at all.
I don't know why, but it was great, I'm not complaining.
And, I did forget to bring my money, so I only got to send two postcards.
So, I'm sorry A, I really wanted to send you one!
Now, I'm going to do some hxc REpacking and I'm off to camp.