Afar
Title: Afar
Pairings: Jack/Juliet, Sawyer/Juliet
Rating: PG
Spoilers: 5.11 "Whatever Happened, Happened"
Disclaimer: Not mine!
lostsquee luau: For jate92, who requested Jack/Juliet.
Even when they were close, she loved him from afar.
There was always too much space between his heart and hers. A space big enough to fit all of her issues, all of his, and Kate in the middle. Sawyer's there too now, trying to pull her close and push Jack away.
Except if he's in the middle, he's right next to Kate. Right back where he's always been. Juliet supposes nothing's changed except for the fact that instead of one man living in denial, she has two. Two men who wanted to love her but really love Kate.
So yes, nothing's really changed. It's just doubled.
If she listened to her heart, currently beating out of her chest as she yells at Jack - so close, too close - she'd push aside the space between them that currently only steam occupies and undermine her angry words with hasty action. Because she wants to hate him for coming back and ruining what she had, but she can't.
It hadn't been happiness, and what she hates is the fact he's made her face it. She and Sawyer were comfortable and reassuring. Shoulders to lean on, arms to hold. Love, but not love. Not under her skin, riled up, flushed cheeks, pulse racing love.
Sawyer doesn't make her feel what she feels now, standing in front of Jack in the too-small bathroom as he wilts and wavers before her very eyes. He's more damaged than ever, falling to pieces, and she wants to keep him together, wake him up. Wake him up like he once woke her up. Jarred her from her self-pity and weakness, her cold detachment, and pushed at her heart until she couldn't ignore it any longer.
But she doesn't. The ground may be shaking underneath her feet and the walls coming down, but she'll just stand in the doorway and hope it all doesn't collapse. She'll take the hit if it comes.
She's loved Jack from afar and she knows how that ends.