Summer Doldrums....
This summer is flying by without much excitement thus far.. Work is still work although since the stretcher incident I seem to have made my way into the good side of my boss.. it is wierd the tides seem to be changing there and all of the cliques seem to be changing, In about two weeks i went from being kinda just there to being in "THE" incrowd, not a bad thing but not really a great thing either... i could give a shite less. well that isnt true, i do harbour some happy feelings about being more well respected and viewed that i actually do know what i am doing, but doesnt everyone? My vacation is in less than two weeks and i am really happy about that, i really need some time away.. School is looming on the horizon, i am totally excited to be finally starting paramedic school something that i have wanted for a long time but at the same time i am just a bit apprehensive and totally scared shiteless. It will be fine, i am going to kick some major arse in the class but cant help being scared... preformance anxiety if you will . the men in my life continue to swirl around, nothing definite or concrete ever happens just kinda a maybe here and there, i cant say i am all that upset about that either... the more i see of other people and their relationships the more i realize i am totally not cut out for one myself .. a man i have had a huge crush on for about 3 years now, who has in the past walked in and out of my life at his pleasure but was otherwise occupied in a bad relationship, finally got out of that relationship and is hovering on the edge of my life.. he is currently doing the whole "i dont want to jump into anything now i am not ready" thing " just gonna have some fun and be single" i think it is all for the best though... Other than all that i am just really bored and waiting for my vacation to spice up my life .