Second Thoughts by Steve Berman
Starting to write my impression on this book, while still all the idea were storming in my brain, probably I realized one of the meaning of the title: Second Thoughts, since all the story in this anthology were previously published elsewhere and Steve Berman collected them and added his second thoughts on them, the author's note, that in a way, I read with more eagerness than the stories, since they told something more on the author, and his interrupted love story with a college roommate, Michael "Mike" Carte, to whom is also dedicated the book, using Catullo's poem "Odi et Amo".
Bittersweet: two very young boyfriends, one of the two is sadly ill and needs to have a serious surgery. The other one cheats on him during his absence, just a fling, but it's a way to loose all the tension he has on his too young shoulder. He is not the bad hero, he is only a 17 years old guy who, maybe for a time, wants to love as his age would let him. On the Author's Note, Steve tells us as this story was inspired by a real guy he met once and as in the story, probably for that guy there was a happily ever after on his personal story, but not with Steve.
Secrets of the Gwangi: these are actually flashes of story with two couples and a man divided by time. Two lovers in the Old West, a director of some decades ago, and two stuntmen of the present. I would like to read more about the two lovers even if I think that there is not an happily ever after there. On the Author's Note, Steve tells us of his first tentative sexual experience when he was still a child, and how it was a consequence of telling stories, quite right giving what he became after.
Kiss: this is the bittersweet tale of a guy who is in love with his roommate, but his can be only an unrequited love, since the other guy loves more and with too more people at the same time. I hoped for the guy in love to find something better, if he survives to his second kiss... On the Author's Note, Steve tells us of his first crush and kiss, and one of the first time when he probably should have stopped to think and grasp the moment.
Always Listen to a Good Pair of Underwear: in this nice short story we meet for the first time Mike and young Steve, sharing an apartment as student, the place where Steve's love grew in strenght to probably never leave him after. On the Author's Note, Steve presents us Mike, the man who will inspire him for so many story.
The High Cost for Tamarind: in an apocalyptic world two lovers are too young and tender to be together... I don't know but when you read about lover like that you know that they have no chance... On the Author's Note, Steve tells us when he proudly sold his first story and how he presented it to Mike like a precious gift.
The Price of Glamour: this is a fantasy tale, probably the more light and joyous of the anthology, as you can expected when fey and faires are involved. A fairy and a changeling meet and tighten a relationship that for now is only a partnership but maybe in the future... On the Author's Note, Steve tells us of his college experience, as he tried to socialize, but as, at the end, he cared only for Mike.
Tearjerker: truth be told, I didn't understand so well this story, other than it's really sad... On the Author's Note, Steve tells us how he started to losing Mike way before he really lost him.
Well Wishing: a fantasy story about a salesman, a farmer, and his two sons, a boy and a girl. The salesman is more interested in the boy than in the girl, but he probably didn't do the right choice. Another story with a sad ending. On the Author's Note, Steve tells us how it was hard to think to have really lost Mike and how he tried to replace him with another impossible love. Till they are far from him, it's easier to love them and to see them realize their dreams. One side note: who is the porn actor?
Caught by Skin: in a futuristic world where love is chemical and aseptic, someone realizes that maybe he is losing something when it's too late to grasp and hold him. But maybe there is hope to still have something real. On the Author's Note, Steve plays.
A Rotten Obligation: an hustler is on the road to maintain a promise but he is derailed by love. Will he maintain the promise or will he finally seize his chance to happiness, burning all the bond with an horrible past? On the Author's Note, Steve tells us his own personal hustler story, and as everyone who saw Pretty Woman, also him probably would like to find a Richard Gere for every Julia Roberts (male or female) out there on the street.
Hidden in Central Asia: a gay boy leaving country on a cultural trip, maybe thinks that so far from his real world, things could be different and he can really straighten himself. But what on vacation seems possible, in reality is impossible. On the Author's Note, Steve tells us his own personal het story, and we also know as Mike was again Steve muse, being the lost boy on a dark night in Vintage. Mike with his repressed love and with his anger against life who didn't allow him to be what he would like to be. Mike so strong outside, and probably so scared of life inside.
Kinder: a man is so bound to the past that he probably can't see that he has a different future beside him. I didn't understand if, in the end, he seizes his chance. On the Author's Note, Steve tells us as he always tries to save Mike.
A Troll on a Mountain with a Girl: in a fantasy world a man is chasing monsters... but maybe the reason why he is chasing them is not what you can expected. On the Author's Note, Steve tells us why he is telling us stories...
This anthology is not accordingly to any standard a light anthology. And accordingly to me is not even something you can read one story detached of the others. It's a love declaration and like that you need to read it all together. Giving that the stories were originally published elsewhere and detached, it's also a confession on how the author probably pours all of him in his stories. Some of the stories I like a lot, some a bit less, but I absolutely love all the Author's Notes.
Amazon: Second Thoughts: More Queer and Weird Stories
Amazon Kindle: Second Thoughts: More Queer and Weird Stories
Paperback: 212 pages
Publisher: Lethe Press (August 15, 2008)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 159021028X
ISBN-13: 978-1590210284
Reading List: http://www.librarything.com/catalog_bottom.php?tag=reading list&view=elisa.rolle