Bachelorette Party
We're going to take a brief interlude in the honeymoon story to talk about the night before the big day.
Saturday night after the rehearsal dinner, I lead Danielle and her mom to my uncle's place where some of us were going to stay. I have been instructed to meet the rest of the girls at Bonnie's, so Danielle and I make our way there.
I walk up to the door, and I see something interesting: Bonnie's parents chilling out in front of the TV. I'm thinking "Oh my God, I knew this was going to be tame, but you've got to be kidding me!"
So I walk in the door and am waylaid by Bonnie's mother who is asking me all sorts of questions. When I finally get into the kitchen, I look around and notice that everyone is in their bed-clothes. I think to myself "My bachlorette party is a fucking slumber party at my best-friend's parents' house. My life sucks."
I see a cake that reads "RIP-Your single life" and suddenly I'm wearing this ugly ass veil and a sash that says BACHELORETTE that will not stay on. Bonnie announces we're going to play a round of "Pin the bow on the Bachelor" and I think I may barf. By this point I probably have rolled my eyes an inumerable number of times and I'm thinking I'd probably rather be spending my last night single peeling off my finger nails and smoking crystal meth.
Then suddenly Jen has a fantastic idea: let's go get some beer. I jump at the chance "yes, let's do!" and just like that we were off.
I promptly got into Meg's car and smoked as many cigarettes as possible.
Keep in mind that I have smoked 2 cigarettes in my life.
Even though I am feeling rather high from the nicotine, I notice that we are in fact driving downtown. Before I know it, we are pulling into the parking lot at The Quest. I see Bonnie, Amanda, Les, and Jen climb out of the car wearing sexy black outfits and I think "Thank God my girls know me better than that"
We spent the rest of the evening taking shots, drinking beer, and dancing until we were all about to pass out. I couldn't have asked for a better Bachelorette Party.
Saturday night after the rehearsal dinner, I lead Danielle and her mom to my uncle's place where some of us were going to stay. I have been instructed to meet the rest of the girls at Bonnie's, so Danielle and I make our way there.
I walk up to the door, and I see something interesting: Bonnie's parents chilling out in front of the TV. I'm thinking "Oh my God, I knew this was going to be tame, but you've got to be kidding me!"
So I walk in the door and am waylaid by Bonnie's mother who is asking me all sorts of questions. When I finally get into the kitchen, I look around and notice that everyone is in their bed-clothes. I think to myself "My bachlorette party is a fucking slumber party at my best-friend's parents' house. My life sucks."
I see a cake that reads "RIP-Your single life" and suddenly I'm wearing this ugly ass veil and a sash that says BACHELORETTE that will not stay on. Bonnie announces we're going to play a round of "Pin the bow on the Bachelor" and I think I may barf. By this point I probably have rolled my eyes an inumerable number of times and I'm thinking I'd probably rather be spending my last night single peeling off my finger nails and smoking crystal meth.
Then suddenly Jen has a fantastic idea: let's go get some beer. I jump at the chance "yes, let's do!" and just like that we were off.
I promptly got into Meg's car and smoked as many cigarettes as possible.
Keep in mind that I have smoked 2 cigarettes in my life.
Even though I am feeling rather high from the nicotine, I notice that we are in fact driving downtown. Before I know it, we are pulling into the parking lot at The Quest. I see Bonnie, Amanda, Les, and Jen climb out of the car wearing sexy black outfits and I think "Thank God my girls know me better than that"
We spent the rest of the evening taking shots, drinking beer, and dancing until we were all about to pass out. I couldn't have asked for a better Bachelorette Party.