[translation] Kitayama's long interview, Myojo 2012.12
this interview needed to be translated! it's very interesting to hear them talking about the junior period and all the hardships they had. (this interview made my heart ache a lot ;~;) can't wait to read other member's interviews.
um, this is my first long translation and there were some very tricky parts, so any possible corrections and feedback are welcome.
big thanks for damagea and withcoffee for the help. ♥
anyway, i hope you enjoy reading? :3
Kitayama Hiromitsu 10,000 characters Long Interview
"The uncovered era - when I was a Junior"
Until high school he was a soccer person. The boy who'd grown up in the hierarchy of sports clubs was suddenly standing in the same start line with little kids. For this reason, there are many thoughts piled up with "the record of the oldest one to have a CD debut".
The era of the boy who loved seeing his parent smile
What did you love when you were little?
I loved my parent very much. When we were taking pictures and the like, I was always making weird faces. And my mother said "Your face will really become like that" with a shrill laugh. That made me happy. I remember loving to see my parent and people around me smile.
[T/N: he used 親 when talking about his parent(s), and at first i assumed he meant his mother, until he suddenly used "both parents" once, and i got confused. so i just used 'parent' for 親, i hope it's not too confusing. :x]
That's cute (laughs).
I was also often mistook as a girl. But I was mischievous. I often did things like raising girls’ skirts and stuff like that (laughs).
So weren't you a kid who stood out?
It wasn't really in a sense of wanting to stand out though. I was shy. But I guess I maybe stood out. Like, if something I made didn’t have originality, I couldn’t allow it. even if I made one thing of something, if it didn’t have originality I couldn’t understand it. For example, even though I was told "make such and such origamis", I would do it in my own special way, arranging, using different colored papers. Even one part was enough, but I wanted to make different things than other people.
So you are the type who can't go forward if they don't get the understanding.
Yes. During the lessons in elementary school, I'd ask all the time until I understood. Being like "Teacher, I don't get it, I don't get it!"
You started soccer in the 1st year of elementary school, right. What was the motive?
When it was time to enter elementary school, we moved houses. Up until then, I'd been doing baseball but in the mansion we moved in, there were 4-5 kids around the same age as me. In that bunch, there was one kid who said, "let's do soccer!", so we all were like "ok, me too!" and started playing.
You were fairly good, right?
I can't really say that myself. But some techniques you use your body to, which take about a week to learn, we all were able to do it after two days. This happened a lot.
Did you do things like being a captain?
Hmm, I wasn't really a type like that. When there was a match, I would be pulling the team along, but at that time I wasn't able to say "let's work hard!" at the kids who didn't do well in the practice. Because I myself could do it, I didn't know what I should say, or what kind of words would be good.
I see. Even in middle school, soccer was your passion?
Yes. Soccer was completely the center of my life.
What was your dream around that time?
I wanted to become a professional soccer player. Someday, when playing soccer video games, I wanted to control my own character there.
I want to try doing a job where you can give people happiness and make them deeply moved
You went to Horikoshi High School, right?
I didn't even know there were courses attended by celebrities though (laughs). Horikoshi's soccer department was so strong, to the point in where it had been in the inter high school (soccer tournaments) countless times. I underwent the selection and entered the school.
But you didn't even know there were celebrities.
In the school entrance ceremony, although baseball department had bouzu hair and soccer department had short hair, suddenly a freshman with blond hair walked in. "Who’s that?! Is blond hair okay?" I thought. That was Yamashita (Tomohisa).
You were surprised, weren't you?
Yes. After the ceremony ended, we were talking at a friend's house, and that friend's younger sister was a fan and said "Yamapi was there, right!", so it became a talk about Yamashita. I said "He's great, isn't he. He's been working since middle school", so I was told "Well, wouldn't it be ok to try to apply". So that friend's little sister sent my resume to Johnny's.
So that's how it started.
After a little while, an audition notification came. Around the end of the first year's summer, I think. Even though I was all surprised "Eh!?", I had soccer so I thought I couldn't go. Then, on that day, for some reason we didn’t have practice. Even though we had practices 360 days a year. Somehow, I felt as though I was sucked in by fate.
It was quite unexpected, right.
But I was really worried. I had discussions with my supervisor. By the way, even though the whole story is like this, I told that I'd want the coexistence with soccer, but was told that "We don't need guys who have two goals".
You had to choose between the two.
I wasn't able to get to the conclusion immediately... I said I'd go to the audition only because we had a day -off from practice.
How was the audition?
There were elementary and middle schoolers, only kids younger than me. During the interview, the president said "if only you were three years younger". As I had always been playing soccer, I had a suntan and was all black, and was asked "YOU, is that from tanning salon?" (laughs).
Hahahaha.
At the end of the audition, I was told "next, there are lessons for so-and-so many days, so come there"... So, for a little while, there was this period of time when I couldn't decide between soccer and Junior activities and was feeling sad because of it. Junior lessons were on Monday at 1 o'clock. I couldn't dance at all, so I did morning practice for soccer and then left from the class, did the after school practice, and when everyone started heading home all exhausted, I went all the way to Hachiouji and practiced in a dance school and then went home with the last train.
You were working so hard like that. Finally, what was the thing that gave you the final push in the back?
Nagase (Tomoya)-kun did a drama called "Handoku!!", and even though I wasn't really watching TV, I suddenly happened to see the final episode. When watching that, I was moved to tears. "I wonder what kind of job an entertainer would be?" I said to my parents, and they opposed it and said "There's no way you could become something like that. Even if you tried and it wouldn't work out, what would you do then?" My parents were both teachers, so they always told me to go to university and become a government worker.
But even if you were opposed, you couldn't give up?
The impression from watching "Handoku!!" couldn't be contained. I said I wanted to try a job which would make people happy and make them deeply moved. Even though I had opposition, conversely I said "Well, I will try it!"
You didn't have a lingering affection towards soccer?
I plainly quit it. Because the lingering affection was very unpleasant, I threw away all the spikes and balls I had been using up until then.
What is this mysterious wall in front of me that's blocking the way?
In Horikoshi, there wasn't only Yamashita-kun, but also Tanaka Koki-kun and Hasegawa Jun-kun were your classmates. Was there any interaction?
There wasn't. Even though our grade was the same, Yamashita and the others were the heads in the Juniors and were holding microphones. I was blended with the little kids at the farthest back, in the very beginning. The guys who had been doing Junior activities since middle school went to Horikoshi. But although I wasn't in the celebrity courses, when I went to lessons wearing Horikoshi's uniform, I was looked at like "Who's this guy?".
The juniors of your period were all younger than you.
The little kids said things like "Oi, Kitayama! Give us candy!" and the like. When my eyes would part just a little, they'd eat the candy I had in my bag and so on. Well, it was Nikaido (Takashi) who was doing that, among others (laughs). I had always been raised among sports-minded people where one gains his position based on how many years one’s been in a team, so I couldn't understand that, and I once asked Johnny-san "Does the age or hierarchy matter?", and he said "It doesn't. It's YOU guys' freedom."
I see.
That's why, the first thing I did when joining Juniors, was to throw away my pride.
Did you continue your private dancing lessons?
I continued them, but it was mortifying. It was like, "Why won't my body move like that?". Besides, the things I'd thrown away were big after all.
The things thrown away?
I started my junior activities with a different kind of life and aiming for different kind of dreams. But for my soccer friends, I came out only as a guy who'd abandoned his dreams on the way. "What the hell is he doing?", they said. Therefore, I wanted to prove that I could debut in some way or another and that I hadn't made a mistake in choosing a different way of life. Nevertheless, I didn't really know which area it would be best to start working hardest with, but because I had done soccer, moving the body, I decided to try my best with dancing at first.
You did your best starting from your strong point.
The president said to me: "If you can't do a back flip, it's bad", so I went to my old middle school's gymnastics teacher and had him teach me.
So you did that kind of thing, too.
Because I didn't have any other people I could have relied on.
So were there any results from your great efforts?
In the lessons, there were five groups from A to E. One group had 7 or 8 people. At that time, Miyata (Toshiya) was in A group. I was in E at first. After a little while, the choreograph teacher said to me "You can dance, can't you", and pop!, I was put in the center of the A group.
You were recognized.
That was the start. After becoming the part of the A group, I was called to my first TV show, to the very back row.
Do you remember the first recording?
I was backing Yamashita-tachi's group Four Tops and we danced to the song "Natsu no kakera". I was near the very back, one could almost say that we could be abandoned there. Almost in a sense of hiding behind a pillar.
After that, you had small step ups little by little?
I was still reckless. But I thought that "what is this mysterious wall" that was blocking my way in front of me.
Mysterious wall?
Although I was dancing the dances properly, there were guys who did it all flabbily and still got to dance in a better position than me. Therefore, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't become the best, or rather I couldn't make progress.
That is tough.
Rather than tough, it was miserable. I didn't know what I should do to get valuation, or from what basis you would be let to hold a mic. Now I get it. The star quality one is given in birth is different for each (person). People aren't equal, people who are blessed with (that kind of ability) exist. I'm not like that at all. But I didn't realize that, and was always thinking "He holds a mic, but I can't. What the hell is that difference?". It was mortifying.
It was something like, the leftovers gathered together
What kind of Junior activities did you have after that?
The president told some people, "YOU guys, can you wear roller skates?". I had also been doing ice hockey, and was told that I was good, so I became part of the roller skate team. Before NEWS' debut, Masuda (Takahisa) was also there, among others. After that, the little kids were out because they couldn't do more advanced stuff.
With Yokoo Wataru-kun, Fujigaya Taisuke-kun and the others, as Kis-My-Ft., you were able to back many groups, right. And then, in 2005, finally...
Suddenly, the president said "YOU guys, starting from today, you'll be a new group. What do think is the group name?". When we asked, "who are the members?", it seemed like they'd add Senga (Kento), Miyata, Tamamori (Yuta) and Nikaido. Naturally, we didn't know what the group name would be. Then, he said: "It's the two, two! Kis-My-Ft2!"
The members you merged with were young, right.
There was a similar kind of pattern as with Tonisen and Kamisen (V6). But honestly, I was thinking "how will it be with these members?". Why was there Nikaido, who'd stolen my candies (laughs).
Were you anxious?
The collected members, including the original members, were omitted because of NEWS and such. Therefore, at first it felt like it was the leftovers gathered together.
I see.
Nevertheless, I thought that together with these guys, we couldn't shine and absolutely couldn't debut.
Were there chances of success?
There weren't (laughs). Generally thinking, we were nothing but leftovers. However, I thought that "let's believe". I don't understand things like the development of a talent. Who would become what, and the like. However, the president must have put us together because he felt something in these members. At the present point, we were maybe leftovers. But, I thought that let's believe in our possibility.
Where did you think you should start for the sake of shining as a group?
First of all, all members needed to be able to wear roller skates and skate properly. I was the oldest one, so I thought that maybe I had try and make this group work in some way or another, so before the rehearsals started, I collected everyone up and we practiced. I also did things like, called to a scary choreographer teacher, saying "I would like you to watch us".
However, it seems that there was some rebellion, "the era's different", regarding roller skating among the members?
There was. Therefore, at times, I persuaded them with all my might (laughs). "Saying only negative things won't start anything. Try to change your point of view. This is the chance".
Once again, it was good he was there
However, Hey!Say!JUMP debuted before you.
I was seriously impatient. Because, it was "Heisei" and I was born in Showa period. It was a shock, there were maybe no possibilities for a debut anymore. For the members, for A.B.C-Z too, it was of course tottering. Sort of like receiving an uppercut. Everyone had stayed on in one way or another, but.
You also backdanced for Hey!Say!JUMP, right.
It was honestly mortifying. I continued thinking "what are we lacking?". Because I couldn't find a specific answer (to that question), I discussed it with the members, that even though we are now in the back there are many people watching this stage and if we could have even one person there thinking that “Kisumai is great”, (it would be good). We persisted in the pride that there absolutely were people coming to watch us.
In the middle of that, there was a turning point?
The president always told us "this is because YOU guys can't sing~". And it was a bit sudden, but as I was humming to myself, the president was walking in front of me. He quickly turned around and said "Kitayama?!". I asked "Did something happen?", and he said "no, it's nothing" and went off just like that. Next day, there was a TV recording, and "Midnight Shuffle - Kitayama Hiromitsu" was written (on the schedule). And then, I was able to sing it together with Kisumai. On that stage, Fujigaya was really cool. After that, the chances to sing as Kisumai increased little by little. Fujigaya also became able to do rap.
In Kisumai, you and Fujigaya-kun have the image of pulling the group along together?
That's because we were always together. And because at first, the younger ones couldn't do anything (laughs). The whole time, when me and Fujigaya were asked "can you do this?", we not even once said "we can't". We climbed over various things together. Therefore, we kind of didn't need words. During times when your spirit breaks and the like, he really understands, that guy. The time when it was still only four of us, Fujigaya was unexpectedly settled for a CM. I guess there were many things he was thinking. I feel so over again, but it was good that he was there. Now, there are also other members, and it's like we are maintaining a reasonable distance, but it's really a good distance. If it hadn't been him, I wouldn't be here, and if it hadn't been me, he wouldn't be here.
If it's for Kisumai's sake, it's okay to be hated by anyone
Nonetheless, there are no guarantees of debut for anyone. Who became your support?
Takizawa (Hideaki)-kun's existence was a big part, I think. It was the first time I made friends with someone older than me. And because he was the one who needed us.
You were needed?
At first, he let us be part of DREAM BOYS. Though, the first time I properly talked to him was at the time of the first performance of Takizawa Enbujou. It seemed that he had his eyes on me because I looked sour (laughs). That is, I didn't want to lose. I guess I appeared there with the attitude like "I absolutely won't lose!", against KAT-TUN, or against NEWS.
So it was like that.
Takizawa-kun invited me for a meal. I was told "If you weren't so impertinent, I wouldn't become friends with you" (laughs). But he also said "If you aren't a bit impertinent, you won't be able live in this world".
That kind of thing happened.
I said that if it was for Kisumai's sake, for me it's okay to be hated by anyone. I always thought like that. I worked hard and stood out a little because I felt like it would draw Kisumai's debut nearer. I think Takizawa-kun saw that kind of attitude as a bit risky. In reality, I also think that there were many people who didn't think of me very often (laughs). Since then, Takizawa-kun entrusted me and Fujigaya with important butai roles a lot. The fact that there was a person who called for us encouraged us immensely.
I see.
Personally, Ohkura (Tadayoshi)'s existence was also big. I've always been friends with him. Since the old days, he's been telling me that "you will absolutely do well!". Also: "If you ever think of leaving Johnny's, tell me first". Even though I felt like "what, saying all these cool things", I was happy that he told them to me seriously. In Ohkura's house, he also showed me the photobook from the 47 prefecture tour. While watching all the great photos, and impatiently thinking "I wonder if we can someday become like this", I simultaneously thought "We will definitely debut".
I kind of understood the meaning of living and the value of my own being
And, finally in 2009, you did your own independent tour.
How should I put it, when the tour was decided, I felt like "this is the start at last". At last we stood on the line where we were able to make negotiations with the president. Until then, when saying "we want to debut", there isn't the persuasive power, right. It isn't the position where you can say that. It's like, when you can properly collect the audience and fortify your steps, you can first say that. You are granted the chance. But we still couldn't say "we want to debut", not yet. The debut that seemed nothing but a shade flickered.
After that and the time until the debut, is there anything impressive that happened?
The press conference that we did on the stage of Yokohama Arena in front of the fans.
It was on March, 2010.
Yes. "What is your aim now?" Miyata, me, Fujigaya and Tama were asked in turns. I was thinking whether I should say that we want to debut. I had always been looking for the best timing to say those words. Then, Miyata, whose turn was first, said "we want to debut!", and I thought "Ah, he said it! Seriously?!"
Although you'd always been choosing the timing at your own discretion (laughs).
But now that I think about it again, I think it was good that it was Miyata who said it. Because it's Miyata who's always smiling without self-assertion, I think the feelings were transmitted.
That might be true.
Naturally, we had always been talking about how we want to debut with the fellow members. "Just how old are we already?" (laughs). But we hadn't thought that Miyata would have the courage to say that in front the fans, during a press con. I prepared myself for the worst.
But, from that point, the debut was still a bit ahead. Was there anxiety?
There always was. But after doing the first tour it was only us believing in ourselves. During lives and wherever, we only had to do the best performance. We had no choice but to get acknowledged. There was also pressure because failures couldn't be forgiven.
And then, 6 years after your formation, during your 2011 tour's Tokyo show, on the stage, there was suddenly a brown enveloped from the president that was delivered to you.
The envelope was entrusted to me, and when I opened it, it had "CD debut decided" written. The moment when I saw the words, like, I don't know what my true feelings were. If I were to put them in words here, it was the dream that we had forever and ever been embracing, coming true. Like, I didn't know how to convey it to the members or to the fans. And then, Miyata came to save with the "Oi!" (laughs). There are various things that are recalled in my mind. Bitter times, times that we worked hard, times that we fought... Then, when Yokoo-san was like "That's a freaking long letter!" And I was like, let me just enjoy this for a while.
At the time of the announcement, the fans were also very happy, right.
It was strange feeling. Like, although it was about yourself, it still kind of wasn't. Even if I was happy, the fans were also this happy. Around the venue, I could see the faces of fans who were laughing and who were crying. I had jumped in to this world because I wanted to give people deep emotions or give them courage. I thought "you can really do this kind of thing". Until then, I hadn't had any true feelings but at that moment, and this is maybe a bit exaggerating but, I kind of understood the meaning of living and the value of my own being.
It was a long, long journey until the debut.
Long, I wonder. Like, I always felt isolation. When I felt it was for the group's sake, I went and said things I wanted to say. But when the debut was decided, there were a great number of fans who were glad for us. Moreover, there were many mails coming from other Juniors like Yara (Tomoyuki)-kun and Tatsumi (Yuudai)-kun, saying, "I knew you could do it!". When seeing that, I seriously became teary. I had made friends who would face me properly like this. I swore that we’d debut with pride.
A message from a friend was "bitter feelings are treasures"
As you debuted at the age of 25, it was the record at that time.
I always thought that I have my own pace I go with. The age didn't matter that much. I joined juniors late, and always believed that I'm absolutely holding something. Even though I was made fun of by people around me countless times, and being told "aren't you a bit old", I thought "What do you know about me".
Well, then the meaning of the record of the oldest one to debut is just a decoration?
Yea. Before debut, my friend once said to me that "bitter feelings are treasures". When thinking about that, I was always bitter. Those bitter feelings became very much like energy and a power spring. If I don't forget that bitterness, I can keep aiming at the top forever. If I think back upon the vexing days, I can go back to the feelings I had when I stood on the start line. It was message that really pierced my heart.
Well, if you could tell something to your Junior self now (what would it be)?
If it's only one word/thing, then maybe "what if you’d be even more worried?". Until debut, we really kept on worrying. We saw off many senpai's and groups' debuts. Three or four different groups, even. That's why, as we kept wondering "well, how should we be", we understood an answer to that question only when it had been a year since our debut. We had various troubles respectively, had setbacks, made mistakes over and over again, continued worrying and debuted because of that.
If you were to give advice to current juniors?
It would maybe be: "continue believing". If one keeps on running, there will absolutely be something waiting. As for me, after doing soccer for 10 years, I quit on the way. If I was to say what remained, tangibly nothing did. But, the days I devoted myself to the passion and the days I cried and laughed together with my team mates won't disappear. Because, for 10 years I continued learning the wonderfulness of being able to attain (something) with all your might. I think that is an important thing, no matter what kind of world you're living in. Therefore, even if the flowers won't bloom in the form one wished, if you keep on running till the end, the time when you look back it's not supposed to be bitter.
Well, from now on, individually and as a group, how do you want to go?
As for the group, I really want to become SMAP-san level. Not only so that everyone knows us, but I want to become a group that is loved. For example, how should I put it, if Miyata had to be absent from a filming because of cold, when seeing that from TV, mothers anywhere would think "I wonder if Miyacchi is ok. I'm worried", that kind of feeling of distance. And like, if we met people on a location shoot, the kind of group which could make grandpas, grandmas, children, everyone smile. I want to become so that people could come and talk to us like "hello~". By no means putting on airs, and without being uptight.
And individually?
I want to be MC. I involuntarily think Nakai (Masahiro)-san as my teacher (laughs). Since "Handoku!!", after a long time I've found something I want to become. At the time when I appeared on a variety show alone after the debut, Nakai-san was the host. I thought that "this is really like a battlefield". The demanded talk speed is extremely fast. I thought that it's amazing to manage that. When I told my friend that I want to be MC in the future, he laughed "you can't do that". Well, that was my high school classmate Koike Teppei (laughs). Therefore, I said "It's amusing, isn't it. Just watch". Isn't it worth doing only so that people around you would think "No way! So that Kitayama is a guy who'd do this much!".
Lastly, how do you feel about the distance between you and Yamashita, who was like someone above the clouds in your high school entrance ceremony, now?
Yamashita's great even now. I think he's great, however, somewhere there's this feeling of absolutely not losing to him. There are things only he can do. However, there are also things only I can do. It's not something one can compare, because I'm weak myself, but thanks to the members I'm able to do various things. Do you remember what I said in the beginning of this interview, how "people aren't equal"?
Yes.
I still think so. The talent nature and ability people carry from birth aren't equal. However, if you have a dream and keep on running towards it, the chance will come to anyone equally.
--
comments are appreciated! ♥
don't repost as a whole. taking/quoting shorter bits is okay, but a small credit would be nice.
thanks for reading~! :3
um, this is my first long translation and there were some very tricky parts, so any possible corrections and feedback are welcome.
big thanks for damagea and withcoffee for the help. ♥
anyway, i hope you enjoy reading? :3
Kitayama Hiromitsu 10,000 characters Long Interview
"The uncovered era - when I was a Junior"
Until high school he was a soccer person. The boy who'd grown up in the hierarchy of sports clubs was suddenly standing in the same start line with little kids. For this reason, there are many thoughts piled up with "the record of the oldest one to have a CD debut".
The era of the boy who loved seeing his parent smile
What did you love when you were little?
I loved my parent very much. When we were taking pictures and the like, I was always making weird faces. And my mother said "Your face will really become like that" with a shrill laugh. That made me happy. I remember loving to see my parent and people around me smile.
[T/N: he used 親 when talking about his parent(s), and at first i assumed he meant his mother, until he suddenly used "both parents" once, and i got confused. so i just used 'parent' for 親, i hope it's not too confusing. :x]
That's cute (laughs).
I was also often mistook as a girl. But I was mischievous. I often did things like raising girls’ skirts and stuff like that (laughs).
So weren't you a kid who stood out?
It wasn't really in a sense of wanting to stand out though. I was shy. But I guess I maybe stood out. Like, if something I made didn’t have originality, I couldn’t allow it. even if I made one thing of something, if it didn’t have originality I couldn’t understand it. For example, even though I was told "make such and such origamis", I would do it in my own special way, arranging, using different colored papers. Even one part was enough, but I wanted to make different things than other people.
So you are the type who can't go forward if they don't get the understanding.
Yes. During the lessons in elementary school, I'd ask all the time until I understood. Being like "Teacher, I don't get it, I don't get it!"
You started soccer in the 1st year of elementary school, right. What was the motive?
When it was time to enter elementary school, we moved houses. Up until then, I'd been doing baseball but in the mansion we moved in, there were 4-5 kids around the same age as me. In that bunch, there was one kid who said, "let's do soccer!", so we all were like "ok, me too!" and started playing.
You were fairly good, right?
I can't really say that myself. But some techniques you use your body to, which take about a week to learn, we all were able to do it after two days. This happened a lot.
Did you do things like being a captain?
Hmm, I wasn't really a type like that. When there was a match, I would be pulling the team along, but at that time I wasn't able to say "let's work hard!" at the kids who didn't do well in the practice. Because I myself could do it, I didn't know what I should say, or what kind of words would be good.
I see. Even in middle school, soccer was your passion?
Yes. Soccer was completely the center of my life.
What was your dream around that time?
I wanted to become a professional soccer player. Someday, when playing soccer video games, I wanted to control my own character there.
I want to try doing a job where you can give people happiness and make them deeply moved
You went to Horikoshi High School, right?
I didn't even know there were courses attended by celebrities though (laughs). Horikoshi's soccer department was so strong, to the point in where it had been in the inter high school (soccer tournaments) countless times. I underwent the selection and entered the school.
But you didn't even know there were celebrities.
In the school entrance ceremony, although baseball department had bouzu hair and soccer department had short hair, suddenly a freshman with blond hair walked in. "Who’s that?! Is blond hair okay?" I thought. That was Yamashita (Tomohisa).
You were surprised, weren't you?
Yes. After the ceremony ended, we were talking at a friend's house, and that friend's younger sister was a fan and said "Yamapi was there, right!", so it became a talk about Yamashita. I said "He's great, isn't he. He's been working since middle school", so I was told "Well, wouldn't it be ok to try to apply". So that friend's little sister sent my resume to Johnny's.
So that's how it started.
After a little while, an audition notification came. Around the end of the first year's summer, I think. Even though I was all surprised "Eh!?", I had soccer so I thought I couldn't go. Then, on that day, for some reason we didn’t have practice. Even though we had practices 360 days a year. Somehow, I felt as though I was sucked in by fate.
It was quite unexpected, right.
But I was really worried. I had discussions with my supervisor. By the way, even though the whole story is like this, I told that I'd want the coexistence with soccer, but was told that "We don't need guys who have two goals".
You had to choose between the two.
I wasn't able to get to the conclusion immediately... I said I'd go to the audition only because we had a day -off from practice.
How was the audition?
There were elementary and middle schoolers, only kids younger than me. During the interview, the president said "if only you were three years younger". As I had always been playing soccer, I had a suntan and was all black, and was asked "YOU, is that from tanning salon?" (laughs).
Hahahaha.
At the end of the audition, I was told "next, there are lessons for so-and-so many days, so come there"... So, for a little while, there was this period of time when I couldn't decide between soccer and Junior activities and was feeling sad because of it. Junior lessons were on Monday at 1 o'clock. I couldn't dance at all, so I did morning practice for soccer and then left from the class, did the after school practice, and when everyone started heading home all exhausted, I went all the way to Hachiouji and practiced in a dance school and then went home with the last train.
You were working so hard like that. Finally, what was the thing that gave you the final push in the back?
Nagase (Tomoya)-kun did a drama called "Handoku!!", and even though I wasn't really watching TV, I suddenly happened to see the final episode. When watching that, I was moved to tears. "I wonder what kind of job an entertainer would be?" I said to my parents, and they opposed it and said "There's no way you could become something like that. Even if you tried and it wouldn't work out, what would you do then?" My parents were both teachers, so they always told me to go to university and become a government worker.
But even if you were opposed, you couldn't give up?
The impression from watching "Handoku!!" couldn't be contained. I said I wanted to try a job which would make people happy and make them deeply moved. Even though I had opposition, conversely I said "Well, I will try it!"
You didn't have a lingering affection towards soccer?
I plainly quit it. Because the lingering affection was very unpleasant, I threw away all the spikes and balls I had been using up until then.
What is this mysterious wall in front of me that's blocking the way?
In Horikoshi, there wasn't only Yamashita-kun, but also Tanaka Koki-kun and Hasegawa Jun-kun were your classmates. Was there any interaction?
There wasn't. Even though our grade was the same, Yamashita and the others were the heads in the Juniors and were holding microphones. I was blended with the little kids at the farthest back, in the very beginning. The guys who had been doing Junior activities since middle school went to Horikoshi. But although I wasn't in the celebrity courses, when I went to lessons wearing Horikoshi's uniform, I was looked at like "Who's this guy?".
The juniors of your period were all younger than you.
The little kids said things like "Oi, Kitayama! Give us candy!" and the like. When my eyes would part just a little, they'd eat the candy I had in my bag and so on. Well, it was Nikaido (Takashi) who was doing that, among others (laughs). I had always been raised among sports-minded people where one gains his position based on how many years one’s been in a team, so I couldn't understand that, and I once asked Johnny-san "Does the age or hierarchy matter?", and he said "It doesn't. It's YOU guys' freedom."
I see.
That's why, the first thing I did when joining Juniors, was to throw away my pride.
Did you continue your private dancing lessons?
I continued them, but it was mortifying. It was like, "Why won't my body move like that?". Besides, the things I'd thrown away were big after all.
The things thrown away?
I started my junior activities with a different kind of life and aiming for different kind of dreams. But for my soccer friends, I came out only as a guy who'd abandoned his dreams on the way. "What the hell is he doing?", they said. Therefore, I wanted to prove that I could debut in some way or another and that I hadn't made a mistake in choosing a different way of life. Nevertheless, I didn't really know which area it would be best to start working hardest with, but because I had done soccer, moving the body, I decided to try my best with dancing at first.
You did your best starting from your strong point.
The president said to me: "If you can't do a back flip, it's bad", so I went to my old middle school's gymnastics teacher and had him teach me.
So you did that kind of thing, too.
Because I didn't have any other people I could have relied on.
So were there any results from your great efforts?
In the lessons, there were five groups from A to E. One group had 7 or 8 people. At that time, Miyata (Toshiya) was in A group. I was in E at first. After a little while, the choreograph teacher said to me "You can dance, can't you", and pop!, I was put in the center of the A group.
You were recognized.
That was the start. After becoming the part of the A group, I was called to my first TV show, to the very back row.
Do you remember the first recording?
I was backing Yamashita-tachi's group Four Tops and we danced to the song "Natsu no kakera". I was near the very back, one could almost say that we could be abandoned there. Almost in a sense of hiding behind a pillar.
After that, you had small step ups little by little?
I was still reckless. But I thought that "what is this mysterious wall" that was blocking my way in front of me.
Mysterious wall?
Although I was dancing the dances properly, there were guys who did it all flabbily and still got to dance in a better position than me. Therefore, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't become the best, or rather I couldn't make progress.
That is tough.
Rather than tough, it was miserable. I didn't know what I should do to get valuation, or from what basis you would be let to hold a mic. Now I get it. The star quality one is given in birth is different for each (person). People aren't equal, people who are blessed with (that kind of ability) exist. I'm not like that at all. But I didn't realize that, and was always thinking "He holds a mic, but I can't. What the hell is that difference?". It was mortifying.
It was something like, the leftovers gathered together
What kind of Junior activities did you have after that?
The president told some people, "YOU guys, can you wear roller skates?". I had also been doing ice hockey, and was told that I was good, so I became part of the roller skate team. Before NEWS' debut, Masuda (Takahisa) was also there, among others. After that, the little kids were out because they couldn't do more advanced stuff.
With Yokoo Wataru-kun, Fujigaya Taisuke-kun and the others, as Kis-My-Ft., you were able to back many groups, right. And then, in 2005, finally...
Suddenly, the president said "YOU guys, starting from today, you'll be a new group. What do think is the group name?". When we asked, "who are the members?", it seemed like they'd add Senga (Kento), Miyata, Tamamori (Yuta) and Nikaido. Naturally, we didn't know what the group name would be. Then, he said: "It's the two, two! Kis-My-Ft2!"
The members you merged with were young, right.
There was a similar kind of pattern as with Tonisen and Kamisen (V6). But honestly, I was thinking "how will it be with these members?". Why was there Nikaido, who'd stolen my candies (laughs).
Were you anxious?
The collected members, including the original members, were omitted because of NEWS and such. Therefore, at first it felt like it was the leftovers gathered together.
I see.
Nevertheless, I thought that together with these guys, we couldn't shine and absolutely couldn't debut.
Were there chances of success?
There weren't (laughs). Generally thinking, we were nothing but leftovers. However, I thought that "let's believe". I don't understand things like the development of a talent. Who would become what, and the like. However, the president must have put us together because he felt something in these members. At the present point, we were maybe leftovers. But, I thought that let's believe in our possibility.
Where did you think you should start for the sake of shining as a group?
First of all, all members needed to be able to wear roller skates and skate properly. I was the oldest one, so I thought that maybe I had try and make this group work in some way or another, so before the rehearsals started, I collected everyone up and we practiced. I also did things like, called to a scary choreographer teacher, saying "I would like you to watch us".
However, it seems that there was some rebellion, "the era's different", regarding roller skating among the members?
There was. Therefore, at times, I persuaded them with all my might (laughs). "Saying only negative things won't start anything. Try to change your point of view. This is the chance".
Once again, it was good he was there
However, Hey!Say!JUMP debuted before you.
I was seriously impatient. Because, it was "Heisei" and I was born in Showa period. It was a shock, there were maybe no possibilities for a debut anymore. For the members, for A.B.C-Z too, it was of course tottering. Sort of like receiving an uppercut. Everyone had stayed on in one way or another, but.
You also backdanced for Hey!Say!JUMP, right.
It was honestly mortifying. I continued thinking "what are we lacking?". Because I couldn't find a specific answer (to that question), I discussed it with the members, that even though we are now in the back there are many people watching this stage and if we could have even one person there thinking that “Kisumai is great”, (it would be good). We persisted in the pride that there absolutely were people coming to watch us.
In the middle of that, there was a turning point?
The president always told us "this is because YOU guys can't sing~". And it was a bit sudden, but as I was humming to myself, the president was walking in front of me. He quickly turned around and said "Kitayama?!". I asked "Did something happen?", and he said "no, it's nothing" and went off just like that. Next day, there was a TV recording, and "Midnight Shuffle - Kitayama Hiromitsu" was written (on the schedule). And then, I was able to sing it together with Kisumai. On that stage, Fujigaya was really cool. After that, the chances to sing as Kisumai increased little by little. Fujigaya also became able to do rap.
In Kisumai, you and Fujigaya-kun have the image of pulling the group along together?
That's because we were always together. And because at first, the younger ones couldn't do anything (laughs). The whole time, when me and Fujigaya were asked "can you do this?", we not even once said "we can't". We climbed over various things together. Therefore, we kind of didn't need words. During times when your spirit breaks and the like, he really understands, that guy. The time when it was still only four of us, Fujigaya was unexpectedly settled for a CM. I guess there were many things he was thinking. I feel so over again, but it was good that he was there. Now, there are also other members, and it's like we are maintaining a reasonable distance, but it's really a good distance. If it hadn't been him, I wouldn't be here, and if it hadn't been me, he wouldn't be here.
If it's for Kisumai's sake, it's okay to be hated by anyone
Nonetheless, there are no guarantees of debut for anyone. Who became your support?
Takizawa (Hideaki)-kun's existence was a big part, I think. It was the first time I made friends with someone older than me. And because he was the one who needed us.
You were needed?
At first, he let us be part of DREAM BOYS. Though, the first time I properly talked to him was at the time of the first performance of Takizawa Enbujou. It seemed that he had his eyes on me because I looked sour (laughs). That is, I didn't want to lose. I guess I appeared there with the attitude like "I absolutely won't lose!", against KAT-TUN, or against NEWS.
So it was like that.
Takizawa-kun invited me for a meal. I was told "If you weren't so impertinent, I wouldn't become friends with you" (laughs). But he also said "If you aren't a bit impertinent, you won't be able live in this world".
That kind of thing happened.
I said that if it was for Kisumai's sake, for me it's okay to be hated by anyone. I always thought like that. I worked hard and stood out a little because I felt like it would draw Kisumai's debut nearer. I think Takizawa-kun saw that kind of attitude as a bit risky. In reality, I also think that there were many people who didn't think of me very often (laughs). Since then, Takizawa-kun entrusted me and Fujigaya with important butai roles a lot. The fact that there was a person who called for us encouraged us immensely.
I see.
Personally, Ohkura (Tadayoshi)'s existence was also big. I've always been friends with him. Since the old days, he's been telling me that "you will absolutely do well!". Also: "If you ever think of leaving Johnny's, tell me first". Even though I felt like "what, saying all these cool things", I was happy that he told them to me seriously. In Ohkura's house, he also showed me the photobook from the 47 prefecture tour. While watching all the great photos, and impatiently thinking "I wonder if we can someday become like this", I simultaneously thought "We will definitely debut".
I kind of understood the meaning of living and the value of my own being
And, finally in 2009, you did your own independent tour.
How should I put it, when the tour was decided, I felt like "this is the start at last". At last we stood on the line where we were able to make negotiations with the president. Until then, when saying "we want to debut", there isn't the persuasive power, right. It isn't the position where you can say that. It's like, when you can properly collect the audience and fortify your steps, you can first say that. You are granted the chance. But we still couldn't say "we want to debut", not yet. The debut that seemed nothing but a shade flickered.
After that and the time until the debut, is there anything impressive that happened?
The press conference that we did on the stage of Yokohama Arena in front of the fans.
It was on March, 2010.
Yes. "What is your aim now?" Miyata, me, Fujigaya and Tama were asked in turns. I was thinking whether I should say that we want to debut. I had always been looking for the best timing to say those words. Then, Miyata, whose turn was first, said "we want to debut!", and I thought "Ah, he said it! Seriously?!"
Although you'd always been choosing the timing at your own discretion (laughs).
But now that I think about it again, I think it was good that it was Miyata who said it. Because it's Miyata who's always smiling without self-assertion, I think the feelings were transmitted.
That might be true.
Naturally, we had always been talking about how we want to debut with the fellow members. "Just how old are we already?" (laughs). But we hadn't thought that Miyata would have the courage to say that in front the fans, during a press con. I prepared myself for the worst.
But, from that point, the debut was still a bit ahead. Was there anxiety?
There always was. But after doing the first tour it was only us believing in ourselves. During lives and wherever, we only had to do the best performance. We had no choice but to get acknowledged. There was also pressure because failures couldn't be forgiven.
And then, 6 years after your formation, during your 2011 tour's Tokyo show, on the stage, there was suddenly a brown enveloped from the president that was delivered to you.
The envelope was entrusted to me, and when I opened it, it had "CD debut decided" written. The moment when I saw the words, like, I don't know what my true feelings were. If I were to put them in words here, it was the dream that we had forever and ever been embracing, coming true. Like, I didn't know how to convey it to the members or to the fans. And then, Miyata came to save with the "Oi!" (laughs). There are various things that are recalled in my mind. Bitter times, times that we worked hard, times that we fought... Then, when Yokoo-san was like "That's a freaking long letter!" And I was like, let me just enjoy this for a while.
At the time of the announcement, the fans were also very happy, right.
It was strange feeling. Like, although it was about yourself, it still kind of wasn't. Even if I was happy, the fans were also this happy. Around the venue, I could see the faces of fans who were laughing and who were crying. I had jumped in to this world because I wanted to give people deep emotions or give them courage. I thought "you can really do this kind of thing". Until then, I hadn't had any true feelings but at that moment, and this is maybe a bit exaggerating but, I kind of understood the meaning of living and the value of my own being.
It was a long, long journey until the debut.
Long, I wonder. Like, I always felt isolation. When I felt it was for the group's sake, I went and said things I wanted to say. But when the debut was decided, there were a great number of fans who were glad for us. Moreover, there were many mails coming from other Juniors like Yara (Tomoyuki)-kun and Tatsumi (Yuudai)-kun, saying, "I knew you could do it!". When seeing that, I seriously became teary. I had made friends who would face me properly like this. I swore that we’d debut with pride.
A message from a friend was "bitter feelings are treasures"
As you debuted at the age of 25, it was the record at that time.
I always thought that I have my own pace I go with. The age didn't matter that much. I joined juniors late, and always believed that I'm absolutely holding something. Even though I was made fun of by people around me countless times, and being told "aren't you a bit old", I thought "What do you know about me".
Well, then the meaning of the record of the oldest one to debut is just a decoration?
Yea. Before debut, my friend once said to me that "bitter feelings are treasures". When thinking about that, I was always bitter. Those bitter feelings became very much like energy and a power spring. If I don't forget that bitterness, I can keep aiming at the top forever. If I think back upon the vexing days, I can go back to the feelings I had when I stood on the start line. It was message that really pierced my heart.
Well, if you could tell something to your Junior self now (what would it be)?
If it's only one word/thing, then maybe "what if you’d be even more worried?". Until debut, we really kept on worrying. We saw off many senpai's and groups' debuts. Three or four different groups, even. That's why, as we kept wondering "well, how should we be", we understood an answer to that question only when it had been a year since our debut. We had various troubles respectively, had setbacks, made mistakes over and over again, continued worrying and debuted because of that.
If you were to give advice to current juniors?
It would maybe be: "continue believing". If one keeps on running, there will absolutely be something waiting. As for me, after doing soccer for 10 years, I quit on the way. If I was to say what remained, tangibly nothing did. But, the days I devoted myself to the passion and the days I cried and laughed together with my team mates won't disappear. Because, for 10 years I continued learning the wonderfulness of being able to attain (something) with all your might. I think that is an important thing, no matter what kind of world you're living in. Therefore, even if the flowers won't bloom in the form one wished, if you keep on running till the end, the time when you look back it's not supposed to be bitter.
Well, from now on, individually and as a group, how do you want to go?
As for the group, I really want to become SMAP-san level. Not only so that everyone knows us, but I want to become a group that is loved. For example, how should I put it, if Miyata had to be absent from a filming because of cold, when seeing that from TV, mothers anywhere would think "I wonder if Miyacchi is ok. I'm worried", that kind of feeling of distance. And like, if we met people on a location shoot, the kind of group which could make grandpas, grandmas, children, everyone smile. I want to become so that people could come and talk to us like "hello~". By no means putting on airs, and without being uptight.
And individually?
I want to be MC. I involuntarily think Nakai (Masahiro)-san as my teacher (laughs). Since "Handoku!!", after a long time I've found something I want to become. At the time when I appeared on a variety show alone after the debut, Nakai-san was the host. I thought that "this is really like a battlefield". The demanded talk speed is extremely fast. I thought that it's amazing to manage that. When I told my friend that I want to be MC in the future, he laughed "you can't do that". Well, that was my high school classmate Koike Teppei (laughs). Therefore, I said "It's amusing, isn't it. Just watch". Isn't it worth doing only so that people around you would think "No way! So that Kitayama is a guy who'd do this much!".
Lastly, how do you feel about the distance between you and Yamashita, who was like someone above the clouds in your high school entrance ceremony, now?
Yamashita's great even now. I think he's great, however, somewhere there's this feeling of absolutely not losing to him. There are things only he can do. However, there are also things only I can do. It's not something one can compare, because I'm weak myself, but thanks to the members I'm able to do various things. Do you remember what I said in the beginning of this interview, how "people aren't equal"?
Yes.
I still think so. The talent nature and ability people carry from birth aren't equal. However, if you have a dream and keep on running towards it, the chance will come to anyone equally.
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comments are appreciated! ♥
don't repost as a whole. taking/quoting shorter bits is okay, but a small credit would be nice.
thanks for reading~! :3