So a very good thing happened...
Ryan apologized to me yesterday, and today we talked normally for the first time in almost two weeks. I have come to realize that I need to love him enough to let him go be his own person. He told me he still loves me, and I love him too, it's just different now. We've both made our mistakes, but we're putting that behind us and starting over as friends. I'm really happy about it. :)