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[elemmennope]

Yesterday I received an envelope stuffed full of pictures from my sister that she took while staying with me this summer. Gah, I look completely hideous in all of them. The person I see in the mirror everyday, while not the most beautiful person on earth, is at least ok looking. I don't walk around with horrible self-confidence and obsess about how

Comments

[brief_therapy]

Ditto. I was thinking this very thing this week when our class photo came out (I work in a school). I look absolutely hideous in that photo and all I could think was, "Is that how people see me all the time?" And, like you, I look in the mirror and have no such thoughts and do not look like I do in photos. Will the real person please stand up and stop looking so dopey?!

[elemmennope]

What is the deal with that? Why are there two different people? I don't get it!

[ellettra]

good grief, do i ever know what you mean about pictures. i have had thi conversation with friends before, though, demanding they look critically at the photo and tell me honestly if that's how they see me. and my friend kate, who is dear enough to me to be honest about stuff like that, once said, "yes, that picture makes you look rather wide. no, that is not what i see when i look at you." she then went on to point out that most people do not look at one another in a "photo" perspective; that is, straight on. kate is taller than me by a good 7 inches, so that's definitely not what she sees, but it makes sense in general. i am convinced that the angle is everything, and most candid-type shots are not carefully composed, and are therefore going to wash you out, make you look heavy, etc. but secondarily, i am almost positive no one else sees that stuff in everyday life. for example, my partner and i went to the beach recently and it was rainy and foggy and she took a picture of me from behind (!!) as i walked along. she liked

[elemmennope]

Big Red Coat Monster, lol!

I know what you mean. But still, in that second my sister was standing and composing these pictures, what she was seeing through the lens must be what I'm seeing in the print. Maybe they just always manage to catch me in the midpoint between expressions or something.

[triforcekt]

I'm not photogenic at all. I hate pictures of myself. Some people just don't look good frozen. Others do. But you have to remember, people that see you see all of you--your motions, expressions, and everything in between. You never look the way you do in a posed photograph unless you're a robot.

What helps me is looking at myself from all angles. The first few times I saw my profile in a picture, I was horrified. Now when I get ready in the morning, I check myself over from the side as well with a hand-held mirror. Somehow it's helped me avoid the OMG UGLY surprise feeling I would normally get from unflattering photographs.

What you need to do is set up your camera in front of a mirror and take some self-portraits of angles from which you feel you look okay. Vain, yes, but it will make you feel worlds better to see yourself pretty in print. I have one or two that I can look at and say, "See? I'm not actually hideous." ;)

[elemmennope]

I can't remember the last time I saw a photo of myself that didn't make me immediately turn away in horror. I have one photo I like, taken back in high school. It's getting on 12 years old now though, so it's a little ridiculous to still be the best one!

Yeah, I don't think I freeze well. I seem to always be in some in-between-expressions with some odd look on my face, mouth twisting, chin jutting out, something... yuck. They are so bad.

[bezigebij]

Yes, I too can completely relate to the first paragraph. When I see myself in the mirror, I am generally happy with what I see. I feel good about myself and my body. I am by no means gorgeous but I feel I am an attractive person. In pictures, on the other hand, I look so dumpy...so large! 9 out of 10 times I barely recognize the person in the picture.

Ah well, 'spose it's better to have a falsely good image of oneself than a falsely bad one. I'll keep believing what I see in the mirror and abide by the logic that the photos lie.

[elemmennope]

Yes, I was thinking the same. At least it's not like in anorexia where you look in the mirror and see something worse than reality. I'll continue to hope I'm as pretty as the reflection too. :)

[girlinthemoon]

i also can relate. i don't always love what i see in the mirror, but i think i have a generally good idea of how i look... i always either look sour or goofy or just cross-eyed in pictures... but i don't think i look that way in the mirror.

i liked 'me and you...' a lot. i thought it was the best sort of independent film... quirky, gritty/real... but also agreed that some of it needed to be more fleshed out, and it wasn't perfect. it made me laugh, though.

will have to add 'my summer of love' to my list, thanks.

[elemmennope]

I read some reviews last night and it seemed people either loved it, or thought it was pretentious and trying way too hard to be quirky with clever lines that were way too forced, and ridiculous situations that wouldn't really happen. I can see where they are coming from, but give me a movie like this over some manufactured Hollywood blockbuster anyday. At least this was trying to say something

[girlinthemoon]

actually rented that just recently myself...i haven't seen much else. i liked 'in her shoes'. it wasn't fantastic, but i like toni collette, and cameron diaz has her good films... this is one of them. did you ever see 'things you can tell just by looking at her'?
i thought the little boy's story was a little silly, too... which was too bad, because he was a cute little actor.
the girl with the hope chest was great, and i liked the two teenaged girls' storyline, as well.