Friday: Angry List
1. Bitch out sister if she's the one who made me angry.
2. Bitch out Jono if he's the one who pissed me off. A frequent occurrence.
3. Sulk in my room.
4. Practice with my sword or magic.
5. Hunt Mary Sues.
6. Fire!
7. Go drinking
8. Bother Kips.
"Alec," Jono asked hesitantly, "What are you doing?" The two of them were on a rocky cliff, surrounded by far too much snow for Jono's liking. He stuck his hands under his arms, willing the air around him to warm up. It took a moment but the air around him did start to feel warmer.
"Checking my arrows," Alec said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He held one up, twirling it around to check the fletching. The cold didn't seem to bother him much, which irritated Jono.
Rolling his eyes, he said, "I can see that, but why are we up here on this mountain in the snow which is definitely not natural?"
Alec pointed using the arrow he held. "See them, over there?"
Jono nodded, seeing the ten individuals struggling up the mountain: a tall man wearing gray robes and a pointed hat, two men in armor, a third man who carried a bow and arrow but nothing for the weather, a short and stout individual also armored, four small individuals who were child sized but didn't look like children and a woman who felt wrong. Blinking his eyes, Jono could have sworn he saw the woman shift or the air shimmer around her. "Yeah, what about them?"
"I'm gonna kill the woman."
"What! Why?" Jono asked, surprised. Alec didn't kill people. He new this. Jono knew Alec since they were five and he didn't have a single killing instinct. He gave Alec a bewildered look, "Did you hit your head on something?!"
Turning, Alec gave him a grin, "No, but she's not real, she's a parasite. Look at her, she doesn't fit, does she?"
"No..." he said, admitting it reluctantly.
"Exactly. Come on!" Putting the arrow back in his quiver, Alec started to bounce down the mountain towards the ten walkers. Sighing, Jono followed, wishing Alec would wipe that gleeful mad expression off his face. It was creepy.
Getting closer to the woman, he saw better what Alec meant about her not being real. No real human could have eyes that blaring shade of gold, black hair with red streaks and be so thin and young but having curves and being able to carry the full armored weight of the sword, backpack, knives, bow and quiver, more knives, another sword that glowed and... The white falcon was also just ridiculous. Finally she just gave Jono the willies.
The ten walkers halted as Alec approached, drawing their weapons. Jono didn't blame them, while not exactly cutting a dangerous figure, Alec did slice a rather crazy one. It was that mad grin at work again.
"Who are you?" the gray robed man, voice full of authority and definitely not human, Jono decided, said. The man felt like the stars to him.
Alec bowed. "I am here for you companion-"
The woman cut him off, "You shall not have Frodo or the Ring!" She stepped forth boldly, drawing out the glowing sword the other sword somehow having vanished and stepped in front of the small child sized individual who must be Frodo.
"I don't want Frodo."
The woman blinked, clearly confused.
"Princess Aurolia Silvermoon Rose Treewa of the Lost Kingdom of Dumar, you are a Mary Sue. You have turned Boromir into a male chauvinist, Legolas into a teenage girl, the hobbits into children. You are not related to Elrond's brother Elros. You do not have the power to resist the One Ring. You are annoying. And I'm cranky so I'm going to kill you," Alec said in one breath, impressing Jono greatly.
"You can't kill me! I have to help Frodo-" and this time Alec cut her off. Or really, cut her head off, which should be impossible but as Alec explained to him later, he had something called narrative causality and it's just cool on his side. Jono just sort of smiled and nodded.
"There that's better," Alec said as he kicked the head. It started to roll down the mountain, bouncing in a horribly gruesome yet fascinating way. Jono couldn't take his eyes off it. There hadn't even been any blood! Alec tugged at him lightly. "Come on, I want to go home."
Jono looked at him, the head finally having vanished, so did the other nine people. "Where'd they go?"
"Oh, they got reset."
"Reset."
"Yeah. Don't worry about it."
"Are you feeling better at least?" he asked, slipping an arm around Alec's waist. Alec leaned his head on Jono's shoulder with a "mmHmm". "Good, I'm glad."
2. Bitch out Jono if he's the one who pissed me off. A frequent occurrence.
3. Sulk in my room.
4. Practice with my sword or magic.
5. Hunt Mary Sues.
6. Fire!
7. Go drinking
8. Bother Kips.
"Alec," Jono asked hesitantly, "What are you doing?" The two of them were on a rocky cliff, surrounded by far too much snow for Jono's liking. He stuck his hands under his arms, willing the air around him to warm up. It took a moment but the air around him did start to feel warmer.
"Checking my arrows," Alec said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He held one up, twirling it around to check the fletching. The cold didn't seem to bother him much, which irritated Jono.
Rolling his eyes, he said, "I can see that, but why are we up here on this mountain in the snow which is definitely not natural?"
Alec pointed using the arrow he held. "See them, over there?"
Jono nodded, seeing the ten individuals struggling up the mountain: a tall man wearing gray robes and a pointed hat, two men in armor, a third man who carried a bow and arrow but nothing for the weather, a short and stout individual also armored, four small individuals who were child sized but didn't look like children and a woman who felt wrong. Blinking his eyes, Jono could have sworn he saw the woman shift or the air shimmer around her. "Yeah, what about them?"
"I'm gonna kill the woman."
"What! Why?" Jono asked, surprised. Alec didn't kill people. He new this. Jono knew Alec since they were five and he didn't have a single killing instinct. He gave Alec a bewildered look, "Did you hit your head on something?!"
Turning, Alec gave him a grin, "No, but she's not real, she's a parasite. Look at her, she doesn't fit, does she?"
"No..." he said, admitting it reluctantly.
"Exactly. Come on!" Putting the arrow back in his quiver, Alec started to bounce down the mountain towards the ten walkers. Sighing, Jono followed, wishing Alec would wipe that gleeful mad expression off his face. It was creepy.
Getting closer to the woman, he saw better what Alec meant about her not being real. No real human could have eyes that blaring shade of gold, black hair with red streaks and be so thin and young but having curves and being able to carry the full armored weight of the sword, backpack, knives, bow and quiver, more knives, another sword that glowed and... The white falcon was also just ridiculous. Finally she just gave Jono the willies.
The ten walkers halted as Alec approached, drawing their weapons. Jono didn't blame them, while not exactly cutting a dangerous figure, Alec did slice a rather crazy one. It was that mad grin at work again.
"Who are you?" the gray robed man, voice full of authority and definitely not human, Jono decided, said. The man felt like the stars to him.
Alec bowed. "I am here for you companion-"
The woman cut him off, "You shall not have Frodo or the Ring!" She stepped forth boldly, drawing out the glowing sword the other sword somehow having vanished and stepped in front of the small child sized individual who must be Frodo.
"I don't want Frodo."
The woman blinked, clearly confused.
"Princess Aurolia Silvermoon Rose Treewa of the Lost Kingdom of Dumar, you are a Mary Sue. You have turned Boromir into a male chauvinist, Legolas into a teenage girl, the hobbits into children. You are not related to Elrond's brother Elros. You do not have the power to resist the One Ring. You are annoying. And I'm cranky so I'm going to kill you," Alec said in one breath, impressing Jono greatly.
"You can't kill me! I have to help Frodo-" and this time Alec cut her off. Or really, cut her head off, which should be impossible but as Alec explained to him later, he had something called narrative causality and it's just cool on his side. Jono just sort of smiled and nodded.
"There that's better," Alec said as he kicked the head. It started to roll down the mountain, bouncing in a horribly gruesome yet fascinating way. Jono couldn't take his eyes off it. There hadn't even been any blood! Alec tugged at him lightly. "Come on, I want to go home."
Jono looked at him, the head finally having vanished, so did the other nine people. "Where'd they go?"
"Oh, they got reset."
"Reset."
"Yeah. Don't worry about it."
"Are you feeling better at least?" he asked, slipping an arm around Alec's waist. Alec leaned his head on Jono's shoulder with a "mmHmm". "Good, I'm glad."