The thoughts of a damn fool.
I really need to stop letting my emotions get the best of me. Jesus I’m so damn bitter…maybe Tim was right…maybe we just shouldn’t talk anymore. It does more harm than good. I want the friendship back…but it hurts ya know? I just can’t leave it well enough alone.
I know I sit here and bitch, piss and moan about how much of an asshole I painted him to be in my head but ya’ll know that I’ve been the bigger asshole. I always do the frosty bitch routine when someone hurts me. I do it was mom, dad, Megan and just about everyone else. It’s one of my many flaws and I feel like an idiot that I act so childish but I try to keep myself so guarded so something like this wasn’t going to happen. But then again I went and fucked up some where along the lines.
I’m sick of playing the angry ex…I just want my friendship back. I almost want to forget about our time so I can be friends with him. I had a helluva lot of fun hanging out with him as friends. Shit I miss jus talking to him…and just sitting there completely silent. He was very comforting…even in a non-relationship manner. He somehow managed to break through the bullshit and get to me…and help calm me down when I needed it.
Yep…I fucked up. I’ll admit it. I fucked up royally and well…it’s my own damn fault. I’ve got too much pride and too much of an ego. He bruised it up pretty good…knocked me down a few pegs…but in reality I think I did me some good.
Maybe I’ll grow up a little more. Make me put things back into perspective.
I know I sit here and bitch, piss and moan about how much of an asshole I painted him to be in my head but ya’ll know that I’ve been the bigger asshole. I always do the frosty bitch routine when someone hurts me. I do it was mom, dad, Megan and just about everyone else. It’s one of my many flaws and I feel like an idiot that I act so childish but I try to keep myself so guarded so something like this wasn’t going to happen. But then again I went and fucked up some where along the lines.
I’m sick of playing the angry ex…I just want my friendship back. I almost want to forget about our time so I can be friends with him. I had a helluva lot of fun hanging out with him as friends. Shit I miss jus talking to him…and just sitting there completely silent. He was very comforting…even in a non-relationship manner. He somehow managed to break through the bullshit and get to me…and help calm me down when I needed it.
Yep…I fucked up. I’ll admit it. I fucked up royally and well…it’s my own damn fault. I’ve got too much pride and too much of an ego. He bruised it up pretty good…knocked me down a few pegs…but in reality I think I did me some good.
Maybe I’ll grow up a little more. Make me put things back into perspective.