(no subject)
i found this online its fuckin hillarious
At age 71, the Pillsbury Dough Boy died yesterday of a yeast infection & complications from repeated pokes in the belly.
Dough Boy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies & Captain Crunch.
The grave site was piled high with flour, as long time friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Dough Boy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Dough Boy rose quickly in show business but in his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he even still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions. Toward the end it was thought he would rise again, but alas, he did not.
Dough Boy is survived by his wife, Play Dough, and two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
At age 71, the Pillsbury Dough Boy died yesterday of a yeast infection & complications from repeated pokes in the belly.
Dough Boy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies & Captain Crunch.
The grave site was piled high with flour, as long time friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Dough Boy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Dough Boy rose quickly in show business but in his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he even still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions. Toward the end it was thought he would rise again, but alas, he did not.
Dough Boy is survived by his wife, Play Dough, and two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.