Co-Dependent
I am a silly girl. As happy as I am with my future secured, and life staying in a simple loving state - I am still sad. Sad because I realized how little I will get to see my love now. We will work different shifts and be back to seeing each other one day a week, which is band practice day.
For some reason it hit me last night, and as great as everything is that is a regret. I know that in time I will be able to change my schedule, but how long do we have to wait for that? He is amazing though and even offered to get up in the middle of the night to spend time with me. Which of course I won't allow, but the gesture is gallant. He truly is my best friend that simple truth most marriages seem to lack. I could live everyday only seeing him for the rest of eternity and be content. More than content even, and without having to ask I know he would say the same. We conquer everything together and in his words "We have a love others only try to guess at. An unshakable love that comes from real understanding." So I know this silly not seeing each other so often thing is irrelevant, but what can I say I love to look at him as often as I can... not to mention no more lunch break kisses. Boo.
Most women seem to always want time away from their husbands, and that makes me wonder about their relationships. So, am I codependent as I have been called? Hardly. I am so strong willed no one can control me. In the years my love and I have been together we have never lost ourselves, but merely grew along side one another. I have simply found the man who never stops entertaining me. The man who always keeps me guessing. The man I can't live without. The man who puts up with my rage... The man who can calm that rage with just one look.
~ till the next ~
**EDIT** I guess it would be more honest to say I found the man that brings the best out in me, and makes me forget the rest of the world when he is around.
Even with our quirks that drive the other nuts: him being so awkward and needy in public settings making it hard for me to enjoy myself/ me being so naggy & over analytical about every look or sentence he or someone else says. Not to mention my demanding nature.(oh boy) :P Even through all those "negative" traits we would always choose the other over anything/anyone else. I am a lucky bastard, and yes I am still sad we wont see one another so often. But as they say absence makes the heart grow stronger. If that is the case my heart is made of metal. indestructible steel.
For some reason it hit me last night, and as great as everything is that is a regret. I know that in time I will be able to change my schedule, but how long do we have to wait for that? He is amazing though and even offered to get up in the middle of the night to spend time with me. Which of course I won't allow, but the gesture is gallant. He truly is my best friend that simple truth most marriages seem to lack. I could live everyday only seeing him for the rest of eternity and be content. More than content even, and without having to ask I know he would say the same. We conquer everything together and in his words "We have a love others only try to guess at. An unshakable love that comes from real understanding." So I know this silly not seeing each other so often thing is irrelevant, but what can I say I love to look at him as often as I can... not to mention no more lunch break kisses. Boo.
Most women seem to always want time away from their husbands, and that makes me wonder about their relationships. So, am I codependent as I have been called? Hardly. I am so strong willed no one can control me. In the years my love and I have been together we have never lost ourselves, but merely grew along side one another. I have simply found the man who never stops entertaining me. The man who always keeps me guessing. The man I can't live without. The man who puts up with my rage... The man who can calm that rage with just one look.
~ till the next ~
**EDIT** I guess it would be more honest to say I found the man that brings the best out in me, and makes me forget the rest of the world when he is around.
Even with our quirks that drive the other nuts: him being so awkward and needy in public settings making it hard for me to enjoy myself/ me being so naggy & over analytical about every look or sentence he or someone else says. Not to mention my demanding nature.(oh boy) :P Even through all those "negative" traits we would always choose the other over anything/anyone else. I am a lucky bastard, and yes I am still sad we wont see one another so often. But as they say absence makes the heart grow stronger. If that is the case my heart is made of metal. indestructible steel.