Sometimes I wonder what the hell I was thinking, becoming a mom. I think I needed to do some more things for myself before taking on mothering
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hey you,the feelings you are having are normal...and you probably are being attacked spiritually. you ARE a good mum. Let's hope your mum is buying that jacket for you. Is it even her style? I know what it's like to be an independent woman who has seemed to have lost her live-ly-hood...but your life has just begun...I really think the best for you n your family is that Jer gets that "better job",where he is payed what his work is worth...Financial stress is the worst for a family...and if you had 'spending money' all three of you would do more and maybe feel more relaxed...yeah,call me materialistic...but money does make a difference...I mean you already have the wonderful family--that's what counts,thus money is what's missing...being a woman,clothes are extremely important to us...that's never going to change...it's our culture and it's actually in every culture..women are suppose to get dolled up...or that's what we are taught...and you know what...i don't think it's bad,'cos i enjoy it.
It's hard being a mum,'cos you feel like you must justify why you are putting a pair of shoes ,or a dress or a wardrobe at that,on your card 'cos you have bills to pay--diapers to buy--teeth to fix....etc.,. but sometimes, it's one of the only ways to keep up your self esteem...
I am not saying one has to look good to be considered worthy...I am just saying this is all natural...your wants,which are in a way needs....to keep your family happy,you must be happy...thus you need to take care of yourself... so i think if there's anyway you can get a lil money on the side to treat mummy to some girlyness do it! Just make yourself a list of all the responsibilities...along with the wants and find a way to make it happen....I know you can....you are so smart and have so much talent (like the nursery you made and the invites).
I am glad you vent though...you need to.
And you know what....you may have been able to have so much more material-wise...but you HAVE SO MUCH MORE than most ppl...YOU HAVE A GREAT RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR DAUGHTER. She is beautiful,healthy,secure,and smart....she got that from you (the sacrificing attached parent that you are). These other mums that I see driving new cars,sporting new clothes all the time and other such...those that are going out every weekend...they did not breastfeed,their kids suffer in daycare all wk long then with a sitter on the wkends...those kids will grow up resenting their selfish mums or atleast have this empty feeling--like they missed something in life.(hopefully those kids will heal themselves)...i am rambling on n on...I just want you to know I feel for you...and I am sorry your going through a rough patch...hey if it make syou feel any better,hopefully not worse,the pants i was wearing to your house...are 6 yrs old
(i can't fit into anything else i use to wear)!!!! hee hee
oxox
and yes,both daughters kept me up all nite...thus i am retarded
It's hard being a mum,'cos you feel like you must justify why you are putting a pair of shoes ,or a dress or a wardrobe at that,on your card 'cos you have bills to pay--diapers to buy--teeth to fix....etc.,. but sometimes, it's one of the only ways to keep up your self esteem...
I am not saying one has to look good to be considered worthy...I am just saying this is all natural...your wants,which are in a way needs....to keep your family happy,you must be happy...thus you need to take care of yourself... so i think if there's anyway you can get a lil money on the side to treat mummy to some girlyness do it! Just make yourself a list of all the responsibilities...along with the wants and find a way to make it happen....I know you can....you are so smart and have so much talent (like the nursery you made and the invites).
I am glad you vent though...you need to.
And you know what....you may have been able to have so much more material-wise...but you HAVE SO MUCH MORE than most ppl...YOU HAVE A GREAT RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR DAUGHTER. She is beautiful,healthy,secure,and smart....she got that from you (the sacrificing attached parent that you are). These other mums that I see driving new cars,sporting new clothes all the time and other such...those that are going out every weekend...they did not breastfeed,their kids suffer in daycare all wk long then with a sitter on the wkends...those kids will grow up resenting their selfish mums or atleast have this empty feeling--like they missed something in life.(hopefully those kids will heal themselves)...i am rambling on n on...I just want you to know I feel for you...and I am sorry your going through a rough patch...hey if it make syou feel any better,hopefully not worse,the pants i was wearing to your house...are 6 yrs old
(i can't fit into anything else i use to wear)!!!! hee hee
oxox
and yes,both daughters kept me up all nite...thus i am retarded
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