Alice's Answers; The Question Meme
ALAIH 'verse Alice answers tazza_di_jo's questions for this meme here
Giorgia's been quite sneaky about this because she already knows a lot of my headcanon. (I half expected her to pick Ianto because we've had lengthly conversations about my headcanon for him!)
What's your first memory of your father?
I don't remember my father from before my mother and I went into witness protection, so I guess my first memory of him would be the day he came back into my life. I was seven years old, out shopping with my mother, and suddenly this man came bounding up to us. I didn't know him, but there he was, your standard handsome hero type, in the most wonderful coat I'd ever seen. I don't remember much of what happened, just that he kept telling my mother how beautiful I was, how clever I was, how charming I was and I was completely taken with him from the word 'go'.
What drove you and your mother into witness protection?
I wouldn't say it drove me into witness protection exactly, I was very young. But a while before we went into deep cover there was an incident that put me in a lot of danger because my mother was helping Torchwood with something and, coupled with who my father is, I really wasn't safe and that tipped the balance and we disappeared off the radar. My mother had to cut contact with everyone, which is why I never knew any of my grandparents or aunts and uncles.
What were relations like between your parents, and how did this affect your own relationship with your father? How much was he present during your childhood and after?
Relations between my parents were.. awkward, to say the least. When I was young I always imagined they might get back together; I even tried to force them together once or twice, but it wasn't to be. My mother despaired at him. She thought everything he did was too much; he gave presents that were too lavish, he drove his car far too fast, he was too loud, he was there too long, he wasn't there often enough. They tended to drift between getting on for my sake and the days where my mother would entrust me into his care and disappear for a few hours so that she didn't have to spend time with him. And when I was younger, that made him all the more appealing. He seemed dangerous and exciting and my mother didn't like him and it all fit with my image of my father the hero. But when I was nine I ended up in danger because of my father and at that point my mother absolutely hated him and I think that's what stuck with me the longest; her hatred. When he came back into my life, her hatred of him had rubbed off on me; I never heard a single person say a good thing about him for the six years he wasn't in my life.
As for how much he was around, oh he'd have been there constantly had my mother have let him. I didn't used to believe it, but I know now that it was true. We had fairly limited contact when I was small, nobody at first knew he was my father and, for my safety, he had to act like he was just another friend. But when I was seven and he found us again I saw him regularly. Then nothing for six years and when I was fifteen he tried to get back in touch; pushed it for weeks and weeks before he gave up and waited for me to initiate contact, which I did when I got married, although he wasn't back in my life - I never told him where to find me or invited him to visit - until Steven was five. And then he was the model father; there every chance he got until I told him to back off.
How has your opinion/perception of your father changed/stayed the same through the years? What do you like/dislike about him?
I absolutely adored every inch of my father when I was a child. Have you met him? He's absolutely wonderful and as a child I couldn't see anything but the good points. But, when I was a teenager and he came back into my life I really hated him. I didn't want to know him, as far as I was concerned he abandoned me and my mother and my mother hated him too at that point. I tried to stay in touch when I got older, but our relationship was always distant, apart from a small amount of time when Steven was younger and before my mother died. After she died, at her funeral, I told him to stay away. I needed my mum and I resented that he would always be around but she would never be again; I was really angry at him for living through so many things that should have killed him, when my mother couldn't fight off a disease.
How did the events with the 456 affect your relationship with and your attitude towards your father?
It showed me new sides to my father. I learned that he was as dangerous as my mother had always told me he was and that he was as fantastic a hero as I'd always imagined him to be. I also learned what Steven and I mean to him, and I think that's what really changed our relationship. It isn't going to be easy, but I'm learning to trust him more and our relationship is getting better. But I'll never completely trust him, I'll always be wary and if anything happens to put my son in danger then I don't think I'd be able to maintain contact with him.
And one more because I'm cheating: What do you think of Ianto? :)
I'm not entirely sure what to make of Ianto. I think he's very good for my father and I do quite like him, but I'm still a little unsettled by the fact that he's younger than I am. Still, Dad is a lot older than he looks, so I suppose even someone twenty years older than me would be young to him. He's very good with Steven and he keeps Dad in line. I owe him my son's life, too, so I've got a lot of respect for him & I'll be eternally grateful for that.
Giorgia's been quite sneaky about this because she already knows a lot of my headcanon. (I half expected her to pick Ianto because we've had lengthly conversations about my headcanon for him!)
What's your first memory of your father?
I don't remember my father from before my mother and I went into witness protection, so I guess my first memory of him would be the day he came back into my life. I was seven years old, out shopping with my mother, and suddenly this man came bounding up to us. I didn't know him, but there he was, your standard handsome hero type, in the most wonderful coat I'd ever seen. I don't remember much of what happened, just that he kept telling my mother how beautiful I was, how clever I was, how charming I was and I was completely taken with him from the word 'go'.
What drove you and your mother into witness protection?
I wouldn't say it drove me into witness protection exactly, I was very young. But a while before we went into deep cover there was an incident that put me in a lot of danger because my mother was helping Torchwood with something and, coupled with who my father is, I really wasn't safe and that tipped the balance and we disappeared off the radar. My mother had to cut contact with everyone, which is why I never knew any of my grandparents or aunts and uncles.
What were relations like between your parents, and how did this affect your own relationship with your father? How much was he present during your childhood and after?
Relations between my parents were.. awkward, to say the least. When I was young I always imagined they might get back together; I even tried to force them together once or twice, but it wasn't to be. My mother despaired at him. She thought everything he did was too much; he gave presents that were too lavish, he drove his car far too fast, he was too loud, he was there too long, he wasn't there often enough. They tended to drift between getting on for my sake and the days where my mother would entrust me into his care and disappear for a few hours so that she didn't have to spend time with him. And when I was younger, that made him all the more appealing. He seemed dangerous and exciting and my mother didn't like him and it all fit with my image of my father the hero. But when I was nine I ended up in danger because of my father and at that point my mother absolutely hated him and I think that's what stuck with me the longest; her hatred. When he came back into my life, her hatred of him had rubbed off on me; I never heard a single person say a good thing about him for the six years he wasn't in my life.
As for how much he was around, oh he'd have been there constantly had my mother have let him. I didn't used to believe it, but I know now that it was true. We had fairly limited contact when I was small, nobody at first knew he was my father and, for my safety, he had to act like he was just another friend. But when I was seven and he found us again I saw him regularly. Then nothing for six years and when I was fifteen he tried to get back in touch; pushed it for weeks and weeks before he gave up and waited for me to initiate contact, which I did when I got married, although he wasn't back in my life - I never told him where to find me or invited him to visit - until Steven was five. And then he was the model father; there every chance he got until I told him to back off.
How has your opinion/perception of your father changed/stayed the same through the years? What do you like/dislike about him?
I absolutely adored every inch of my father when I was a child. Have you met him? He's absolutely wonderful and as a child I couldn't see anything but the good points. But, when I was a teenager and he came back into my life I really hated him. I didn't want to know him, as far as I was concerned he abandoned me and my mother and my mother hated him too at that point. I tried to stay in touch when I got older, but our relationship was always distant, apart from a small amount of time when Steven was younger and before my mother died. After she died, at her funeral, I told him to stay away. I needed my mum and I resented that he would always be around but she would never be again; I was really angry at him for living through so many things that should have killed him, when my mother couldn't fight off a disease.
How did the events with the 456 affect your relationship with and your attitude towards your father?
It showed me new sides to my father. I learned that he was as dangerous as my mother had always told me he was and that he was as fantastic a hero as I'd always imagined him to be. I also learned what Steven and I mean to him, and I think that's what really changed our relationship. It isn't going to be easy, but I'm learning to trust him more and our relationship is getting better. But I'll never completely trust him, I'll always be wary and if anything happens to put my son in danger then I don't think I'd be able to maintain contact with him.
And one more because I'm cheating: What do you think of Ianto? :)
I'm not entirely sure what to make of Ianto. I think he's very good for my father and I do quite like him, but I'm still a little unsettled by the fact that he's younger than I am. Still, Dad is a lot older than he looks, so I suppose even someone twenty years older than me would be young to him. He's very good with Steven and he keeps Dad in line. I owe him my son's life, too, so I've got a lot of respect for him & I'll be eternally grateful for that.