Fic: As Long As I Have (3/?)
Gwen had, unsurprisingly, fussed over Ianto the second she had opened the door. He had let her do it, it had been an emotional few days and he didn’t have the energy to fight her off. So he sat on the sofa and let her make him coffee - it tasted awful - and indulged her when she asked him to let her look at him. He didn’t even argue when she insisted he stay the night, he knew that he shouldn’t be alone tonight, and if he was honest, he didn’t really want to be.
That was why, in the small hours of the morning, he awoke on the sofa in Gwen’s living room. He was sweaty and out of breath and he didn’t dare close his eyes, lest the images of blood and pain, flashes of metal, of gas, of tears spilling from Jack’s eyes, returned.
He kicked the covers off and lay staring at the ceiling, struggling to catch his breath. It had been a long time since he’d had a nightmare, especially one as painful and vivid as that one. He lamented the lack of Jack’s comforting arms, his soothing voice and tender kisses, then mentally chided himself. He wasn’t that needy and as a grown man, he could cope with this alone. Still, Jack probably wouldn’t mind if he called, just to hear the sound of his voice for a moment. He reached for his mobile phone, just as Gwen appeared in the doorway.
“Ianto,” she whispered into the dark, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” he replied, putting the phone back down. He should let Jack sleep.
“I heard you calling out.”
“Oh,” he said, silently cursing, “Must have been in my sleep.”
“Are you sure you’re alright, Ianto?”
“Fine.”
He heard her move across the room and felt the bed dip as she sat on the edge. “Nightmares aren’t anything to be ashamed of, you know.”
“I’m fine, Gwen. It was nothing.” He paused. “Whatever it was.”
“If you’re sure,” she said. When he didn’t respond, she rose from the bed and crossed the room, pausing in the doorway. “Sweet dreams, Ianto,” she whispered, and was gone.
Jack stretched out in the all too large bed in Alice’s spare room. It had been years since he’d slept alone in a bed made for two (or more). He didn’t feel all that well rested, either. Guilt over yesterday’s events and worry about Ianto weighed on his mind. Jack had no clue how his lover had survived, but what he did know was that Martha Jones was the only medic who was getting within ten feet of Ianto. He would call her as soon as she returned from her honeymoon and ask her to check him out. It couldn’t hurt to get Tom to take a look at Steven either. He was, after all, a paediatrician, and Martha clearly trusted him. Jack had not allowed any other doctor to take a look at Steven, and Alice had agreed with his reasoning enough to wait.
The door to the spare room opened, pulling Jack from his thoughts. He looked up to see Steven’s face peering around the door. “Uncle Jack? Can I come in?”
Jack grinned and patted the bed. “Sure, come on in.”
Steven launched himself across the room and jumped up onto the bed, and Jack was happy to see his usual energy had been restored. He would still get Tom Milligan to look him over, though, as soon as possible though.
“Mum says I can stay off school today.”
“That’s good,” Jack said, letting Steven settle himself at his side. “We’ll have to think of something fun to do while your mom’s at work.”
“She’s not going to work. She said we’re all staying here.”
Jack felt a slight irritation that Alice didn’t trust him alone with Steven, but, then again, he couldn’t blame her. Not after the danger he’d put him in, put them all in. He looked over at Steven, whose eyes were drifting closed, the warmth and comfort of the bed carrying him off to a dreamland. He considered joining his grandson, another hour’s sleep couldn’t hurt. Just as he felt his eyelids fall shut he heard Alice in the doorway and opened his eyes again.
She was smiling, “Wish I had the camera.”
“You okay?” Jack asked, sleepily.
“Yeah. Phone for you,” she said, and held out his mobile. He slid from the bed, careful not to wake Steven, and took the phone from Alice.
“Hello?”
“Jack. It’s Gwen.”
“Hello. Everything okay? Ianto alright?”
“He says he’s okay...”
Jack frowned down the phone. “But he isn’t?”
“I think he had a nightmare last night.”
“Oh.” Ianto had stopped having nightmares a while ago, and Jack’s own had become few and far between; they took comfort in each other’s presence to ease their night demons. He sighed. Him being here left Ianto alone and whatever had happened, it had been Jack’s fault. “I’ll be home soon,” he told Gwen. “Just don’t let him go anywhere. I’m worried about him.”
“So am I, Jack,” Gwen said, clearly irritated, “But we can’t treat him like a child.”
“Gwen, please. He’s more fragile than he makes out.”
“I know. I’d better go, he’s getting out of the shower. Bye Jack.”
Jack groaned in frustration as Gwen ended the call. Alice gave him a look. “Is something wrong?”
“Not really. Just Ianto… It’s okay, he’ll be fine for a few days.” He didn’t really believe that Ianto would be okay, but he couldn’t bear to leave his family, not now.
“You know,” Alice said, smiling at him, “Steven’s never been to Cardiff.”
Ianto was sick of being mothered, and despite both Gwen and Rhiannon’s protests, he had insisted on returning to his own house. It seemed far too quiet and empty without Jack there, causing trouble and making mess, but he still took comfort in being in his own home.
He had just sat down on the sofa with a cup of coffee when he heard a key in the lock. He frowned. “Gwen,” he said, standing up. “I said I’d be fine on my- Jack.”
Jack grinned at him. “Honey, I’m home.”
Ianto laughed, “Shut up.”
“I brought some visitors. That okay?” Ianto looked past Jack to where Alice was standing in the doorway, holding onto Steven’s hand.
He smiled. “Come in. Coffee, anyone?”
“You, Ianto Jones,” Jack said, gently tugging him towards the kitchen, “Are the most wonderful Welshman I have ever met."
They decided to go out for lunch. With the large majority of the bay still closed to the general public, they opted to go into town and afterwards took a walk through Bute Park. Steven was racing ahead excitedly, while Alice walked a short way in front of her father and his lover.
Ianto glanced at Jack as they walked. “Why are you here?”
Jack gave him a grin. “Well, you know, I re-grew most of my body parts and we never did get a chance to test them out…”
Ianto stopped and looked at Jack, trying to read him. He sighed. “Gwen called you, didn’t she?”
He took Jack’s silence as an affirmative.
“You didn’t have to come.”
“I wanted to,” Jack told him, gripping at his hands. “I needed to.”
Ianto opened his mouth to speak, but Jack stopped him with a firm kiss. Ianto closed his eyes, letting Jack take him a thousand miles away from all his worries and nightmares. Jack rested his forehead against Ianto’s and interlinked their fingers. They stood there for a moment, in the middle of the park, their eyes closed and their foreheads pressed together, oblivious to anything but each other, needing, after everything, to find comfort in their closeness.
It was Steven’s voice that drew them apart, calling for their attention, and Jack turned, smiling, to look at his grandson. “What is it, soldier?” he asked, keeping one of Ianto’s hands in his.
“You stopped. Come on…”
“Alright, we’re coming,” Jack told him, and squeezed Ianto’s hand. Ianto smiled, Jack’s presence alone had soothed him, but having physical contact with him made Ianto feel far safer than he ever could alone.
Ianto looked over at Steven, who had run back to Alice, and turned to Jack. “Looks like he’s okay, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah,” Jack said, “I’ll still get Tom to look at him when they get back, though.” He paused. “I’d like Martha to check you out, too.”
“I’m fine.”
“Ianto, you died and came back to life.”
“You do it all the time,” Ianto commented flippantly.
“I’m immortal,” Jack told him, “You’re not.”
“I don’t know what happened, Jack.”
“All the more reason for Martha to poke at you a bit.”
“Poke at me Jack?” Ianto asked, an eyebrow raised. “That doesn’t sound appealing.”
“Would it appeal more if I was the one doing the poking?” Jack asked, a filthy smirk spreading across his face.
Alice left Steven in Ianto’s bathroom, brushing his teeth, and made her way down the stairs to get him a glass of water. She paused as she reached the kitchen door and watched the two men in the room move about each other as though they had done this a thousand times. As her father put their plates into a cupboard, she wondered if they had, wondered how long he had been spending his time here. Although he had told them this was Ianto’s house, it was clear to her that her father spent most of his time here. Not just from the easy way he moved about the place but by the dirty boots by the door and the shirts piled up on the tumble dryer, the stack of records on Ianto’s coffee table that she was sure didn’t belong to the Welshman and the aeroplane cufflinks abandoned on the hallway shelf.
She smiled as he stopped moving and turned his head to ask Ianto a question she couldn’t hear. Ianto nodded, a smile on his face, and leant back against the kitchen counter. He looked tired, Alice noticed, but then, that was why they were here; so that her father could take care of him. They seemed happy though, she thought, as her father closed the cupboard and moved to rest his hands on Ianto’s waist. She turned her eyes away as he ducked his head, not wanting to invade their privacy. She moved away from the door, and back up the stairs, deciding that Steven could cope without his water for one night. Her father seemed happier than she had seen him in a long time, and she wasn’t going to interrupt their moment, however long it lasted.
Chapter 4
That was why, in the small hours of the morning, he awoke on the sofa in Gwen’s living room. He was sweaty and out of breath and he didn’t dare close his eyes, lest the images of blood and pain, flashes of metal, of gas, of tears spilling from Jack’s eyes, returned.
He kicked the covers off and lay staring at the ceiling, struggling to catch his breath. It had been a long time since he’d had a nightmare, especially one as painful and vivid as that one. He lamented the lack of Jack’s comforting arms, his soothing voice and tender kisses, then mentally chided himself. He wasn’t that needy and as a grown man, he could cope with this alone. Still, Jack probably wouldn’t mind if he called, just to hear the sound of his voice for a moment. He reached for his mobile phone, just as Gwen appeared in the doorway.
“Ianto,” she whispered into the dark, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” he replied, putting the phone back down. He should let Jack sleep.
“I heard you calling out.”
“Oh,” he said, silently cursing, “Must have been in my sleep.”
“Are you sure you’re alright, Ianto?”
“Fine.”
He heard her move across the room and felt the bed dip as she sat on the edge. “Nightmares aren’t anything to be ashamed of, you know.”
“I’m fine, Gwen. It was nothing.” He paused. “Whatever it was.”
“If you’re sure,” she said. When he didn’t respond, she rose from the bed and crossed the room, pausing in the doorway. “Sweet dreams, Ianto,” she whispered, and was gone.
Jack stretched out in the all too large bed in Alice’s spare room. It had been years since he’d slept alone in a bed made for two (or more). He didn’t feel all that well rested, either. Guilt over yesterday’s events and worry about Ianto weighed on his mind. Jack had no clue how his lover had survived, but what he did know was that Martha Jones was the only medic who was getting within ten feet of Ianto. He would call her as soon as she returned from her honeymoon and ask her to check him out. It couldn’t hurt to get Tom to take a look at Steven either. He was, after all, a paediatrician, and Martha clearly trusted him. Jack had not allowed any other doctor to take a look at Steven, and Alice had agreed with his reasoning enough to wait.
The door to the spare room opened, pulling Jack from his thoughts. He looked up to see Steven’s face peering around the door. “Uncle Jack? Can I come in?”
Jack grinned and patted the bed. “Sure, come on in.”
Steven launched himself across the room and jumped up onto the bed, and Jack was happy to see his usual energy had been restored. He would still get Tom Milligan to look him over, though, as soon as possible though.
“Mum says I can stay off school today.”
“That’s good,” Jack said, letting Steven settle himself at his side. “We’ll have to think of something fun to do while your mom’s at work.”
“She’s not going to work. She said we’re all staying here.”
Jack felt a slight irritation that Alice didn’t trust him alone with Steven, but, then again, he couldn’t blame her. Not after the danger he’d put him in, put them all in. He looked over at Steven, whose eyes were drifting closed, the warmth and comfort of the bed carrying him off to a dreamland. He considered joining his grandson, another hour’s sleep couldn’t hurt. Just as he felt his eyelids fall shut he heard Alice in the doorway and opened his eyes again.
She was smiling, “Wish I had the camera.”
“You okay?” Jack asked, sleepily.
“Yeah. Phone for you,” she said, and held out his mobile. He slid from the bed, careful not to wake Steven, and took the phone from Alice.
“Hello?”
“Jack. It’s Gwen.”
“Hello. Everything okay? Ianto alright?”
“He says he’s okay...”
Jack frowned down the phone. “But he isn’t?”
“I think he had a nightmare last night.”
“Oh.” Ianto had stopped having nightmares a while ago, and Jack’s own had become few and far between; they took comfort in each other’s presence to ease their night demons. He sighed. Him being here left Ianto alone and whatever had happened, it had been Jack’s fault. “I’ll be home soon,” he told Gwen. “Just don’t let him go anywhere. I’m worried about him.”
“So am I, Jack,” Gwen said, clearly irritated, “But we can’t treat him like a child.”
“Gwen, please. He’s more fragile than he makes out.”
“I know. I’d better go, he’s getting out of the shower. Bye Jack.”
Jack groaned in frustration as Gwen ended the call. Alice gave him a look. “Is something wrong?”
“Not really. Just Ianto… It’s okay, he’ll be fine for a few days.” He didn’t really believe that Ianto would be okay, but he couldn’t bear to leave his family, not now.
“You know,” Alice said, smiling at him, “Steven’s never been to Cardiff.”
Ianto was sick of being mothered, and despite both Gwen and Rhiannon’s protests, he had insisted on returning to his own house. It seemed far too quiet and empty without Jack there, causing trouble and making mess, but he still took comfort in being in his own home.
He had just sat down on the sofa with a cup of coffee when he heard a key in the lock. He frowned. “Gwen,” he said, standing up. “I said I’d be fine on my- Jack.”
Jack grinned at him. “Honey, I’m home.”
Ianto laughed, “Shut up.”
“I brought some visitors. That okay?” Ianto looked past Jack to where Alice was standing in the doorway, holding onto Steven’s hand.
He smiled. “Come in. Coffee, anyone?”
“You, Ianto Jones,” Jack said, gently tugging him towards the kitchen, “Are the most wonderful Welshman I have ever met."
They decided to go out for lunch. With the large majority of the bay still closed to the general public, they opted to go into town and afterwards took a walk through Bute Park. Steven was racing ahead excitedly, while Alice walked a short way in front of her father and his lover.
Ianto glanced at Jack as they walked. “Why are you here?”
Jack gave him a grin. “Well, you know, I re-grew most of my body parts and we never did get a chance to test them out…”
Ianto stopped and looked at Jack, trying to read him. He sighed. “Gwen called you, didn’t she?”
He took Jack’s silence as an affirmative.
“You didn’t have to come.”
“I wanted to,” Jack told him, gripping at his hands. “I needed to.”
Ianto opened his mouth to speak, but Jack stopped him with a firm kiss. Ianto closed his eyes, letting Jack take him a thousand miles away from all his worries and nightmares. Jack rested his forehead against Ianto’s and interlinked their fingers. They stood there for a moment, in the middle of the park, their eyes closed and their foreheads pressed together, oblivious to anything but each other, needing, after everything, to find comfort in their closeness.
It was Steven’s voice that drew them apart, calling for their attention, and Jack turned, smiling, to look at his grandson. “What is it, soldier?” he asked, keeping one of Ianto’s hands in his.
“You stopped. Come on…”
“Alright, we’re coming,” Jack told him, and squeezed Ianto’s hand. Ianto smiled, Jack’s presence alone had soothed him, but having physical contact with him made Ianto feel far safer than he ever could alone.
Ianto looked over at Steven, who had run back to Alice, and turned to Jack. “Looks like he’s okay, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah,” Jack said, “I’ll still get Tom to look at him when they get back, though.” He paused. “I’d like Martha to check you out, too.”
“I’m fine.”
“Ianto, you died and came back to life.”
“You do it all the time,” Ianto commented flippantly.
“I’m immortal,” Jack told him, “You’re not.”
“I don’t know what happened, Jack.”
“All the more reason for Martha to poke at you a bit.”
“Poke at me Jack?” Ianto asked, an eyebrow raised. “That doesn’t sound appealing.”
“Would it appeal more if I was the one doing the poking?” Jack asked, a filthy smirk spreading across his face.
Alice left Steven in Ianto’s bathroom, brushing his teeth, and made her way down the stairs to get him a glass of water. She paused as she reached the kitchen door and watched the two men in the room move about each other as though they had done this a thousand times. As her father put their plates into a cupboard, she wondered if they had, wondered how long he had been spending his time here. Although he had told them this was Ianto’s house, it was clear to her that her father spent most of his time here. Not just from the easy way he moved about the place but by the dirty boots by the door and the shirts piled up on the tumble dryer, the stack of records on Ianto’s coffee table that she was sure didn’t belong to the Welshman and the aeroplane cufflinks abandoned on the hallway shelf.
She smiled as he stopped moving and turned his head to ask Ianto a question she couldn’t hear. Ianto nodded, a smile on his face, and leant back against the kitchen counter. He looked tired, Alice noticed, but then, that was why they were here; so that her father could take care of him. They seemed happy though, she thought, as her father closed the cupboard and moved to rest his hands on Ianto’s waist. She turned her eyes away as he ducked his head, not wanting to invade their privacy. She moved away from the door, and back up the stairs, deciding that Steven could cope without his water for one night. Her father seemed happier than she had seen him in a long time, and she wasn’t going to interrupt their moment, however long it lasted.
Chapter 4