Before the Blood Cools
Before the Blood Cools
Sparks before your eyes and you are getting cold
* * *
And all the shades of red and green seem ironic now.
* * *
Potter is over your face, sudden and solemn as Death, and this might all be a dream or a nightmare or pretend
But all you can see is her
* * *
Involuntarily, fighting for breath-you did not realize how much you feared this moment until it was upon you
But death is just, and death is kind and death is cruel and redemptive and…
* * *
You are no coward, Severus.
* * *
Her eyes are wide, scared, determined, hard, questioning...
So green
* * *
It’s your favourite colour, Sev! and she is excited
A present, your first, on your birthday, first year
Green, and hers, and his
How could she not have known they matched?
* * *
Fighting for breath and you did not realize how much you feared this moment
When you lose her
* * *
When you found her body there, you shut her eyes, do you remember?
* * *
The memories flicker faster than the fading light
Her smile and her eyes, the first time your fingers touched, the curve of her back on your palm…
5th year and her worry, the way she breathed your name, waking up, her tears making her lashes thick
The way she looked wrapped in your scarf, the way she looked wrapped in green sheets, the way she looked walking away
How she looked in his arms
* * *
You can hear her laugh
* * *
It will be quick, now, you realize, but long enough for you to suffer…
This is just, you remind yourself, and her ghost whispers it against your lips
So very cold and You have to do this she urges, you have to help my son
So you give it to him, to her, you give them everything
* * *
The light is fading from your eyes now, Severus…
Who will close them for you?
A plea, desperate
Your epilogue and ending
Look…at…me…
Her eyes are so green