Mr. Lonely
Over the past couple of weeks or so I've felt alone. And I'm not talking about the sitting by myself with no one to talk to or hang out with alone. I'm talking about the need of a female friend type of alone. I mean don't get me wrong, I've had a lot of fun during summer and have spent time with friends and family and have gone out a lot. But sometimes I can be out with a big group of people and having a great time, yet feel like there is something missing. It's become more evident during the last couple of weeks. It just seems as though everyone I know has someone special whom they can talk to and spend some time with. While I was in PR my best friend would spend countless hours on the phone talking to his girlfriend who was in the states. I mean, I don't feel the need to spend so much time on the phone talking to a person every single day, but in a way I wish I had something like that. Also while in PR, a girl whom I once liked a lot had her boyfriend fly over from the states and spend several days with her. To top it all off, I was at a wedding yesterday, were it seemed like everyone there had a significant other. By the way, congratulations to Stephen and Janet Roller! I hope you enjoy the rest of your lives together. I've never really had a significant other. I mean I have fallen for many girls but it's never really worked out. And it may seem like I'm in need of a gf, but it doesn't necessarily have to be a gf, it could be a very good "girl" friend. I once had a "girl" friend whom I was very fond of and cared about a lot whom I talked to pretty much every day and spend a lot of time with whom pretty much filled that void in my life. Unfortunately, I ended up falling for her and that pretty much changed everything. Do I regret falling for her? NO, not at all, I wouldn't change that for anything in the world. There is nothing like the feeling of waking up in the morning and the first thing on your mind being that special someone. Or going to bed at night and the last thing on your mind being that special someone. But I do regret the fact that a lot has changed because I fell for her. I guess love can sometimes be a double-edged sword. So why would I want a "girl" friend again, knowing that there's a possibility of going through this again? I guess because despite everything that has happened when I reflect upon it all, I can honestly say that some of the best times of my life where when I did have a "girl" friend, cause I didn't feel so alone.