Fuck yesterday's castles, they're all broken.

[elcachafaz]

I hate confusion, I hate not knowing what's going on with relationships, friendships, my future, anything. I hate giving 110% to people who make me an "option" at best and then realizing that I have only been giving 5% to people who make me a priority. And I hate getting manipulative letters from ex-boyfriends that remind me of why I can't fucking

Comments

[elcachafaz]

Oh, if only it were true that he's finally getting it. But he isn't--this letter is just him telling me what I want to hear. It's manipulative because he knows me too well--my first reaction was to cry and feel guilty (I actually had to go into the bathroom at work and cry), and to beg HIM for forgiveness. That's exactly what he wanted.
"But please just respond and let me know you got this and read it," that sentence, as Clay said, is rather unnecessary because he knows me and knows I couldn't NOT read it.
"I understand that you probably don’t want to talk to me ever again," is BEGGING me to prove him wrong.
"If you do ever want to talk to me again or if you ever need anything, I’m still here." He's clearly expecting me to want to talk to him again, he's leaving the door wide open expecting me to step on through like I always used to.
And, if all those things weren't proof enough, he called me yesterday to say, "You never told me whether you got my letter or not..." which proves CONCLUSIVELY that this whole thing about understanding that I won't want to talk to him and giving me space is complete and utter bullshit.

[sbrtooth1]

I think it's shortsighted to say that it's purely manipulative. People who are proud people, like Andre clearly is, don't readily admit to their own shortcomings just for the sake of manipulating someone. He might truly believe those things he wrote but he is so selfish that he can't let you go at the same time - even if it's the right thing to do.

You're the one in control of how you respond, not him. If you actually believed you had control over your ability to respond to this I doubt you'd be freaking out about as much as you are/did. It's your choice to pick up the phone when he calls and it's your choice whether or not you beg him for forgiveness. It's always been your choice just like it's his choice to be a liar and a coward.