Open Letter Time!

[elbiesee]

Dear Mickie:

Yes, the first day of summer vacation is here.

If you think this is a season pass to hang out in your underwear, unshowered, eating junk food all day, think again.

I have things to do today. And you have things to do as well - your last report card shows you need more structure this summer, not less.

Now. Get in the shower. We got things to do, girl-head!

Love,
Mom
_____________________________________

Dear Aunt Flo:

Would you stop it with the cramping and the psyche-spotting and the water retention and the moodiness and JUST GET HERE ALREADY?!? I need to get on with my life.

And if you think you can interfere with my weight loss goals, you got another think coming, Madam. As soon as you're gone, I'll probably be another pound lighter, and that means I add a Wonder Woman shirt to my wardrobe. Booyah.

Enjoy your breakfast of ibuprofen.

No Love,
Elbie
_____________________________________

Dear Brain:

Yeah yeah, I know, you+PMS hormones=Duh Moments.

Let's not make this a reason or, worse, an excuse.

Help me help you,
Elbie
_____________________________________

Dear Days Before Vacation:

Oh, sure. When I wasn't paying attention you flew by. Now that I have an idea how many of you there are, you start dragging your heels.

I'm not asking you to relight the fire under your hypothetical butts, but it's encouraging to see less of you, know what I mean?

With gentle urging,
Elbie

PS: take some weight with you when you go.
_____________________________________

Dear People Who Read My Blog (especially the New Ones):

Happy Friday! (And yes, I do this every so often.)

Love,
Elbie