No Mother
No Mother
- A. Richardson
If courage was granted to me
I'd rip out my ovaries and throw them at you.
My eyes are like blinds on broken rollers -
They remain open to everything you do.
Your existence is a downward spiral
Engulfing all negativity;
My body is the firewall which you abuse
So as to not abrupt my sisters' simplicity.
Tiffany tip toes around your shadows
And I'm thankful she has not fallen in -
Brittany mocks the use of your prescriptions,
She's too young to grasp it's a sin.
I am the obvious paranoia of the two,
Of everything about to go wrong.
Trembling with the thought of your mentality,
I'm surprised I've been so strong.
Every word said or thing done
Along with the promise of fairy tales
Only endorses the conclusion we sought,
Result: another monster prevails.
Call me cold again, I truly don't mind,
You're not the one to remotely bother -
You don't digest the coils of rage this takes -
You're not the daughter.
No, I'm not a cunt or a failure,
I'm not all those things you had sworn
I'm independent, loving, and the greatest sister
And no, my dignity isn't all torn.
However, I am still young
And the futuristic path is not all shown
So I kill my ovaries with consumption
In fear of being like you to one of my own.
- Amanda, chewing gum for the first time in over 3 years